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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24239827">Justice and Harmony</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/geeky_page/pseuds/geeky_page'>geeky_page</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Angst, Hogwarts Eighth Year, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 20:00:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>65,575</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24239827</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/geeky_page/pseuds/geeky_page</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Draco landed on his chair and looked at his hands. It was over. Everything was over. His life, his dreams and hopes, ambitions and plans. Nothing mattered anymore, he couldn’t control anything. Except for one thing. He won’t let them see him cry.</p>
<p>-Court calls for witness on Mr. Malfoy’s side,-Draco looked up as he heard Kingsley. He didn’t have a witness, he didn’t have anyone to stand up for him.</p>
<p>-I didn’t…</p>
<p>-Mr. Potter approached me yesterday, saying he wants to testify for you. I couldn’t say no to him,-Draco looked at the door as it opened. Harry quickly walked in and stopped beside Draco. He was looking right into Kingsley’s eyes, with ambition and determination in his eyes.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>261</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The court room was so huge that the light from open windows hardly was enough, even during mornings. It was almost deadly hot, but as the room started filling with people, and each and every single one of them starred at Draco, he started feeling goosebumps and uncomfortable cold on his skin. It seemed like half a Ministry was there, all abandoned their jobs just to decide whether or not Draco Malfoy deserves to have a future. Draco knew that his chances were basically equal to zero. Yet, he hoped. For a miracle, since it was the only thing that could help him.</p>
<p>	Kingsley looked at him with weird compassion, creating a very false illusion that he was on Draco’s side. Or maybe his new raise to Minister of Magic still blew his mind enough to care about other people. Yet, when the trial started, all Draco’s hopes faded away. He was looking at 20 years in Azkaban. More than enough to drive a person crazy, more than enough to kill. Draco listened to Kingsley’s speech as he listed everything Draco was accused for. Malfoy had pretty much nothing to defend himself with. His father had already given out all the names of Death Eaters Ministry would want to know. It didn’t help him. It could have helped Draco though.</p>
<p>	All Draco’s attempts to save himself were small and pathetic. He tried to make them understand why he did what he did, told them all about the threats and dangers that Voldemort promised, told them about tortures and everything that went down in Malfoy Manor over that summer. He really tried to make one himself heard, to make one thought realized by everyone present. He didn’t have a choice. Not really, not ever. But faces of people who were about to decide Draco’s entire life remained indifferent, with a splash of disgust.</p>
<p>-Are you done, Mr. Malfoy?-Kingsley asked. Draco was standing up, all alone against at least 50 people. He was on verge of tears.</p>
<p>-I…I suppose,-he whispered.</p>
<p>-Very well. You may sit down,-Draco landed on his chair and looked at his hands. It was over. Everything was over. His life, his dreams and hopes, ambitions and plans. Nothing mattered anymore, he couldn’t control anything. Except for one thing. He won’t let them see him cry.</p>
<p>-Court calls for witness on Mr. Malfoy’s side,-Draco looked up as he heard Kingsley. He didn’t have a witness, he didn’t have anyone to stand up for him.</p>
<p>-I didn’t…</p>
<p>-Mr. Potter approached me yesterday, saying he wants to testify for you. I couldn’t say no to him,-Draco looked at the door as it opened. Harry quickly walked in and stopped beside Draco. He was looking right into Kingsley’s eyes, with ambition and determination in his eyes.</p>
<p>-Nice to see you, Minister,-he said.</p>
<p>-Likewise, Mr. Potter. Ready to start?</p>
<p>-Of course,-Draco was looking right at Harry, hoping to meet eyes. But Harry ignored him,-I hope it won’t be long since Malfoy’s situation is pretty obvious to me.</p>
<p>-Does it?</p>
<p>-Yes. Draco Malfoy is not an actual Death Eater. He never was,-Harry said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. His statement caused a few gasps over the room. A small smirk appeared on Kingsley’s lips.</p>
<p>-A mark on his arm wouldn’t agree with you, Mr. Potter</p>
<p>-How do you know he wasn’t forced into accepting it? How do you know it was his intention?-Harry asked. Draco had a thought that he had accidentally fallen asleep and this is all a dream. A weird embarrassing dream where Harry Potter chimes in and saves him, defends him in the court in front of 50 people who loathe him, makes everything right again. </p>
<p>-Because he would definitely tell us so, if it was, right?</p>
<p>-He was 16.</p>
<p>-So were you when you killed Voldemort,-even after his death, that name caused anxious whispers to fly over the room,-Given the circumstances, Mr. Malfoy has to be judges as an adult. Especially since he is about to turn 17.</p>
<p>-That is not my point. Draco was given a task and told that unless he completes it, he will die. How is it not clear that Voldemort forced him to do what he did?</p>
<p>-The same thing happened to half of the other Death Eaters. Or so they claim. How do you expect me to believe him?-Kingsley asked.</p>
<p>-Don’t believe him, believe me. I know it wasn’t his intention,-Harry said and for a second put his hand on Draco’s shoulder.</p>
<p>-Mr. Potter,-a lady in a black shirt with very short hair chimed in,-I would like to remind you that the actions of Lucius Malfoy had let to the death of your Godfather in this very Ministry,-Harry closed his eyes and sighed.</p>
<p>-Trust me, I remember that very well. And I would like to remind you that it is not Lucius Malfoy sitting before you.</p>
<p>-Yes, but don’t you think that if Mr. Draco was as innocent as you think he is, he would try and stop his father? Or affect him and his actions in any way?-she asked. Draco didn’t like it. Hearing them talking about his dad and not being able to say anything.</p>
<p>-Are we accusing Draco of not stopping Lucius Malfoy, one of Voldemort’s closest and most powerful allies?-Harry was getting mad,-He is not his father,-Harry added in a much calmer voice and Draco looked up at him again. Potter never took a seat that was offered to him before, and was standing tall beside Draco,-And accusing him of his father’s crimes is not fair.</p>
<p>-According to my information,-the same witch wouldn’t stop,-You and Mr. Malfoy had never been friends in school. Some even referred to you two as “enemies”. How would you know what he wanted?-Harry was silent for a moment. Witch’s usually evil face turned into a very happy and satisfied grin.</p>
<p>-That is true. I wasn’t Draco’s friend. We fought a lot. But I can tell a difference between a truly evil man and a child being pulled into their war,-Harry’s words caused a moment of silence. A witch in black definitely didn’t have anything to say to that.</p>
<p>-Mr. Potter,-Kingsley called, with an intention to finally end everything,-I want to ask you something. Do you truly, genuinely think that Draco Malfoy is innocent? That he had been pulled into the war involuntarily? That his and Voldemort’s views and intentions didn’t match?  </p>
<p>-Yes,-said Harry right away. Draco’s heart jumped,-I do. He was scared, we all were. He didn’t have a choice. Draco is innocent.</p>
<p>-Even though his family is responsible for so much damage that has been done to you?-witch that both Harry and Draco already hated asked,-Even though Mr. Malfoy was the one who led Death Eaters into Hogwarts?</p>
<p>-Yes. If it’s so important, I don’t blame Draco for anything. Even for that,-Harry said through his teeth, but meant every word.</p>
<p>-Thank you, Mr. Potter,-Kingsley said. He looked at his colleagues and after earning a slight nod from almost each one of them, looked at Draco. Malfoy absolutely froze and even If the miracle happens and he gets to walk away free, Draco wouldn’t be able to move.</p>
<p>	Seconds lasted like hours. Draco was physically shaking, yet just the presence of calm and tough Potter made him feel better. Made him feel protected. He looked at him and back at Kingsley.</p>
<p>-Mr. Malfoy, I am pleased to inform you that the court of Ministry of Magic agrees with Mr. Potter and finds you innocent. You are acquitted of all charges.</p>
<p>      Draco sighed and closed his eyes. It all felt like a dream. One that started as a nightmare and ended as the happiest dream in his life. He just couldn’t believe it. Couldn’t believe that he was free, free to live on, free to have a future, free to do whatever he wants with his life. He hid his face in his hands and tried to normalize his breath. Draco heard Kingsley saying something. Congratulations, something about Hogwarts, something about his parents. Draco hardly heard him. He finally looked up and saw Harry walking away and thought that he should thank him. He wanted to thank him. But his legs just wouldn’t work and his chest felt so free without this huge stone of guilt and fear.</p>
<p>	It was a mystery to Draco why on Earth Harry Potter decided to show up and ruin Ministry’s plans to lock another Malfoy away. He heard and memorized every word Harry had said. Heard them, but didn’t know if he should believe them. They seemed too good to be true. How could Potter forgive him, when Draco hadn’t even forgiven himself? How could Potter talk about his innocence and being pulled into the war, when Draco had never hated himself as much as he does now? Why was Potter even here? Who asked him? Why?</p>
<p>	Eventually, some lady approached Draco, gave him his wand and asked if he needed help. Draco said no and finally got to his feet. He walked out of the court room with a weird feeling that his body wasn’t even his, and the reality he was in right now, wasn’t the real one. He saw Harry talking to Kingsley, and before he could tell himself not to, he hid around the corner where he could hear every word they said.</p>
<p>-Very noble of you, Harry,-Kingsley said. Harry didn’t say anything, but Draco was sure he shook his head,-Did you mean what you said? You can tell me now, it won’t affect Malfoy.</p>
<p>-I said the truth,-Draco imagined Harry shrugging,-Of course I meant it.</p>
<p>-Well,-Kingsley sighed,-Have a nice summer then,-Draco heard steps disappearing in the air and once he walked out of his hideaway, Potter was standing on the same spot, watching Minister go. Draco carefully approached him, with absolutely no idea what to say.</p>
<p>-Potter,-his voice came out weak and dry. Harry looked at him with unreadable face.</p>
<p>-Malfoy.</p>
<p>-I…I didn’t know you’d…,-Draco sighed and ordered his brain to start working on producing actual sentences, but it didn’t comply,-Thank you,-he breathed out.</p>
<p>-You’re welcome,-Harry said sincerely,-You’re okay? Have a place to go?-Draco nodded,-Okay. See you in Hogwarts, I guess.</p>
<p>-Yes, see you,-Harry smiled and walked away. And that’s when Draco actually realized the words he’d just said,-Wait, Hogwarts?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em>     9 and ¾</em> platform had never been this crowded before. For the first time in his life Harry got there by himself. Not with Dursleys, in their car listening to endless complains and insults. Not with Weasleys, hoping that floo powder will be enough for everyone. Not surrounded by aurors or members of the Order. Harry woke up a little earlier than usual, grabbed his bag and apparated straight from his apartment at 12 Grimmauld Place to King’s Cross Station. By the time he got there, Ron, Hermione and a couple more familiar faces had already been waiting for him.</p>
<p><em>    A couple</em> wasn’t an understatement. The platform was full of children, but not many of them were his course mates. Harry himself wasn’t sure if going back to Hogwarts was a right thing to do now. But once he approached Ron and Hermione, the doubts faded away a bit.</p>
<p> <br/>    It took them a lot of time and ambition to find a free compartment, but once Harry, Ron and Hermione had settled for one, the usual 1st of September talk started. Ron and Hermione were now officially together, which was great, but Harry couldn’t help but think that the time when the three of them did everything together and had their legendary adventures was behind them and a constant role of the third wheel was now expecting for Potter. Not that he wanted to do anything legendary this year. Not at all. Harry hoped for a calm year, for tons of homework that will distract him from memories and flashbacks. He hoped for a good opportunity to move on and start over. He hoped to discover himself all over again and find out what he truly wanted from life, now that his life had finally started. He really hoped for a very boring 8th year. Boring, according to Hogwarts’s standards.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Not everyone came back, I see,-Ron said as another couple of first-years ran across the train.</p>
<p>-Yeah, but it’s a good thing we did,-Hermione said. Ron smiled, obviously misunderstanding why Granger was so glad to be back,-We need to graduate to find proper jobs.</p>
<p>-For your information,-Ron said,-Me and Harry were already offered to join Aurors Academy. Even without graduating,-Weasley was pretty pleased with himself and smiled at Harry. Potter quickly nodded and tried to smile back. He didn’t know how to tell Ron that the thought of becoming an auror didn’t attract him that much anymore.</p>
<p>-Still, it is important,-Hermione said and started listing all the reasons why without Hogwarts diploma their lives would fall apart and in what ways. Harry wasn’t really listening, instead he studied his window view. Ron just liked hearing his girlfriend talk about something she was passionate about.</p>
<p>-By the way,-Ron said once (or slightly before) Hermione was finished,-I saw Malfoy getting on the train. Can you believe he’s coming back?-Harry was torn away from his thoughts.</p>
<p>-You see, even Malfoy understands how important it is to…,-Hermione started, but Ron shook his head cutting her off.</p>
<p>-I mean, he is supposed to be an Azkaban with his father, not back in school.</p>
<p>-I heard they let him go,-Harry said carefully. He hadn’t told anyone about his visit to Ministry of Magic during Malfoy’s trial and didn’t plan to.</p>
<p>-Someone testified for him,-Hermione, who always knew more than everyone else, said,-But the trail was closed and that person requested to remain anonymous.</p>
<p>-Why would someone do that? And who even has the power to set him free?-Ron asked.</p>
<p>-Well, he didn’t even kill anyone, so…,-Harry said. Ron looked at him, confused by his words.</p>
<p>-I wouldn’t be so sure. He was a Death Eater, he almost killed…Dumbledore,-even after more than a year, it was hard to talk about that loss. It will always be.</p>
<p>-I also don’t think Draco was ever evil,-Hermione said confidently, earning a surprised look from Ron,-He was way too young to be an actual Death Eater. He was forced into it,-Harry silently thanked Hermione for being so understanding. And then he wondered why he actually cares about all that.</p>
<p>-Still, this year is not going to be any fun for him,-Ron said, sighing. Yet, that thought didn’t seem to upset him much</p>
<p>-What do you mean?-Harry asked.</p>
<p>-Hardly anyone else from Slytherin is coming back. There’s him and a couple more people max.</p>
<p>-Well, there aren’t many Gryffindors as well.</p>
<p>-More than Slytherins. Malfoy’s friends Goyle and Parkinson aren’t coming for sure.</p>
<p>-How do you know?-asked Harry.</p>
<p>-Dad told me. Many Slytherins now have more important things to do. Like trying to escape Azkaban, for example,-thinking about his peers actually looking at a horrible life and untimely death in the wizarding world’s worst place didn’t make Harry happy at all. He couldn’t think of Slytherins, or even of Malfoy, as his enemies anymore. Harry had one true enemy and he’s dead. The rest are just people he didn’t get along with it, which could be changed.</p>
<p>     Actually, Harry wondered if those people had changed and how. He imagined how Hogwarts would greet him just in couple hours and how people would look at him. He didn’t want any praise, he just hoped that the warm feeling of being home Harry had every time he had crossed Hogwarts doors wouldn’t disappear.</p>
<p>     As the train had arrived and Harry set foot to Hogwarts, he smiled. For a second, all his doubts about coming back were gone. Harry was happy to be back. Happy to go through another year there, a whole year when he has every right to feel and act like a child. And maybe it was too soon to tell, but Harry sincerely hoped and believed that this year would give him enough positive memories to outweigh all sad ones. At least he wanted to believe in that. Months that it took to rebuild Hogwarts, only made the castle better. It still had its magical, warm, home-like atmosphere, but it also felt new, reborn.</p>
<p>     All 8th year students were asked to follow Headmistress McGonagall once the Sorting ceremony was over. It was nice to be led by her, personally. Took them back to their first year. Minerva brought students to the tower they hadn’t seen before and stopped in front of the tall wooden doors. She smiled warmly at everyone. It looked like she was happy to see every single student who came back. She really was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I am very happy that you have decided to continue and finish your education here, in Hogwarts,-she said,-The castle is always ready to welcome whoever truly wants to learn something. And now you are standing in front of your new common room.</p>
<p>-Our? We will all live together?-a girl from Hufflepuff asked.</p>
<p>-Exactly,-McGonagall smiled again,-I think the events of past year had taught us many lessons, but the biggest one, in my opinion, is how important it is to be united,-Harry heard someone groaning,-It is my decision to do my absolute best to stop the rivalry among Hogwarts Houses. And not a single professor disagreed to support it. So, our first step is to unite someone who had already been through way too much together. You.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>    Harry didn’t know how to feel. He looked around and saw people he used to study and live with. Ron, Neville, Hermione, Dean. Saw faces of Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs he knew, but not really. They looked at him and at McGonagall with a fair share of skepticism and curiosity. And Harry saw only two Slytherin students who decided to come back. Draco, who actually didn’t get to make this decision and whose face remained indifferent and emotionless; and Zabini. Blaise looked around with unfriendly and cold smirk, showing that if there’s anyone Harry should be looking out for, it’s him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Since your program is slightly different from the 7th grade, there’s been made a decision to educate you separately from the rest of Hogwarts. But still, you are the part of it. Crucial part. You will participate in the House Cup Championship, have your own Quidditch team,-a couple people gladly exclaimed,-I knew it would make you happy. If you want to try and join the new team, you can approach…,-Harry saw how McGonagall looked it him and knew she was about to say his name. Well, it was fair, for the last time Hogwarts was safe enough to have Quidditch, Potter was the captain of Gryffindor’s team. But now, he didn’t want anything less than being a captain again. He slightly shook his head and looked at the Headmistress with plea in his eyes. She realized everything right away.<br/>-You can approach Professor Hooch. She will form your team,-Harry gave McGonagall a warm, thanking smile, but she acted as if nothing happened,-If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to ask me,-everyone was so excited to see the new common room that even if they did have questions, they weren’t as important.</p>
<p>-Well. Welcome back, I wish you a good year. Your first password is “Concordia”,-she said and walked away. Harry heard Hermione’s whispers to Ron that “Concordia, actually, means Harmony” and Ron’s pretty fake but pretty adorable gasp.</p>
<p>    Their new common room looked like a mix of all the old ones. It didn’t have one color or a theme. Some walls were bright yellow, others red or green. The ceiling and the floor were deep blue, there were numerous paintings (one of a very nervous man guarding them outside, whose voice broke once he asked McGonagall for the password) on the walls. Overall the room looked as an attempt to please everyone at the same time, or as Ron called it, Hogwarts in a nutshell.</p>
<p>    Two doors in the opposite sides of the common room led to girl’s and boy’s dorms. Ron made another joke saying that they could have them not separated, earning supporting chuckle from some boys and nothing but rolled eyes from girls, including Hermione.</p>
<p>    Harry walked into one of the multiple bedrooms and put his bag next to the bed closest to the window. And when he walked out of it, he saw his own name on the table right outside the door.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Guys?-Harry called for boys’ attention. The knight on the painting next to the dorm smirked.</p>
<p>-Has it been like this before? In Gryffindor?-Anthony Goldstein, a Ravenclaw student, who Harry knew back in DA days asked. Harry shook his head. Ron shrugged and tried to walk into the same dorm, but it seemed like some invisible obstacle didn’t let him do it.</p>
<p>-What the hell?-he asked after trying again and again. </p>
<p>-Quit torturing yourself, child,-knight on the wall, right next to the door told Ron,-One ex-Gryffindor had already walked through this door, no other shall.</p>
<p>-Excuse me?-Ron said.</p>
<p>-Don’t you see? Four beds for four different houses,-Anthony pointed,-They want us to mix.</p>
<p>-That’s just stupid. We can’t choose who to share our dorm with?-Ron asked, not believing him.</p>
<p>-We can,-Harry chimed in,-As long as it’s someone from another house,-Ron sighed and seeing Harry’s not really upset face couldn’t help but feel a little hurt.</p>
<p>-Do you mind?-Goldstein asked Harry, about to enter the room.</p>
<p>-Of course no,-Harry said and another name added to the table. And another; Ernie McMillan, a Hufflepuff student joined them after a minute of thinking. Now they needed a Slytherin.</p>
<p>-Not much of a choice, mate,-Ron smirked,-Malfoy or Zabini. I recommend the second one,-even despite the evil stare he received from Blaise earlier, Harry agreed. He thought and hoped it would be easier with Zabini. Until he saw him walking out of another dorm, without his bag.</p>
<p>-Looks like there is no choice at all,-Harry said, doomedly. Malfoy made one pointless attempt to join Blaise in his room, but it wouldn’t let him in. He sighed helplessly and looked into Harry’s dorm.</p>
<p>-Mr. Malfoy, I am afraid there is no choice here,-the knight from the painting reminded him.</p>
<p>-Who’s idea was it to mix all the houses?-Ron asked, knowing the answer perfectly well.</p>
<p>-A direct order from Headmistress. I am sure she will be more than happy with the results,-knight answered gladly. He obviously took all the credit for the way things turned out; two known “enemies” sharing a dorm.</p>
<p>-What if we talk to her?-Blaise asked,-These two will kill each other if you put them in the same room together.</p>
<p>-You could try. However, I’m afraid it will not lead to anything,-he replied,-Mr. Malfoy, if you are ready to stop wasting everyone’s time,-knight took out his sword and pointed it at the door and table next to it, that still missed one name.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Draco looked into the painting, not sure what to do. Ron’s and Zabini’s words didn’t bother him. Potter’s silence sort of did.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-This is stupid,-he mumbled, passing through the door and as his name finally filled the table, knight applauded. Draco would have already regretted coming back to Hogwarts, if he actually was here on the free will. Instead, he just left his things on the only free bed and dashed out of the common room. Harry saw him out and noticed that even after the midnight, when everyone was done discussing new rules and circumstances they were supposed to live in, and finally went to bed, Malfoy’s bed still remained empty.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>New part :)<br/>I think I'll update this series every other day, but more comments and kudos may make me reconsider and post every day!<br/>Either way, thank you so much for reading. Hope you liked it.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It wouldn’t be fair to say that nothing had changed in Hogwarts and that war hadn’t left any consequences. Everyone tried to act as if it hadn’t, for themselves or for others, who knows. Especially professors and the Headmistress. They kept talking about friendship among houses, about love and harmony, and sometimes it couldn’t help but annoy. Of course, no one wanted to forget everything that happened or those who gave their lives to this war, but still, it was naïve to expect students to sustain that harmony McGonagall wanted so bad.</p>
<p>	And they didn’t. Harry constantly caught weird stares at him, frequently was a subject of discussions, some brave students even asked him questions. How was it, looking for the horcruxes? Were you scared? How did you come back? Why did Malfoy’s mother lie for you?</p>
<p>	Malfoy himself didn’t lack attention too. And that attention seemed to have been very unwanted by him. Draco walked around the school mostly by himself, very rarely with Blaise. During breakfasts and dinners, he sat alone in the very end of a brand-new table, brought into the Great Hall specifically for the 8th year. There was no usual fire in his eyes, no sly smirk on his lips, all faded away. It looked like Draco himself was fading away, slowly getting smaller and even a little translucent. If Harry was to take the courage and assume what was going on with him, he’d say Draco just wanted everyone to leave him alone.</p>
<p>	But apparently, that was too much to ask. It’s unlikely that Hogwarts’s walls had ever seen this much hatred directed at one person. Every joke and insult Malfoy had ever thrown at anyone now seemed pathetic, compared to what he was going through. It looked like nearly every student felt like it was their obligation to remind Malfoy about all his actions before and during the war, about the black serpent on his arm, about that name he hoped to never hear towards himself ever again.</p>
<p>	If this year truly was supposed to be about healing and moving on, Draco had no idea how he was supposed to do that, if people keep reminding him. He heard hateful “Death Eater” from every corner, every evil mouth. Saw people starring at him as if he personally was responsible for every horror wizarding world had to go through. Heard the whispers behind his back, that were nothing compared to loud insults right into his face. Saw people leaving the room when he walked in. Younger students, who were told by their parents to stay away from him, even some of his course-mates. Draco saw a share of sense in this. People needed someone to blame, someone to hate. A particular alive person; it made the pain from all the losses not so sharp. And there he is, an evil Death Eater, on a silver platter.</p>
<p>	Harry and his friends saw it all too. Obviously, they didn’t take part in bullying, but no one rushed to defend and protect Malfoy either. Potter thought that something like this could happen in Hogwarts once they all come back. Many children lost their parents or other loved ones. In a way, hating on Malfoy was natural for them, though, of course, he didn’t deserve any of it. And though Harry managed to prove Draco’s innocence to the Ministry, he knew he didn’t stand a chance when it came to a bunch of angry sad teenagers, even if he tried.</p>
<p>	What Potter did not expect, is that Draco wouldn’t fight back. At all. To anyone. He ignored every insult, every verbal and even non-verbal punch. He let people talk, let them spread any rumors they want, no matter how cruel or bizarre. His face remained indifferent, and if Harry hadn’t seen that sincere shock and fear on Draco’s face back in court, he’d assume Malfoy really doesn’t care. </p>
<p>	Maybe because of boredom (professors decided not to torture the Mister National Hero with homework that much), maybe because of Harry’s natural curiosity, but once again, he tried to keep a close eye to Malfoy and what he was doing. Now his motives weren’t as ominous as two years ago, but he still thought Draco wasn’t acting like himself. It could have been too much to expect, but Harry sort of thought (or even hoped) that some kind of relationship with Malfoy would inevitably start, now that the war is over. At least he had every right for it after he bailed him out of Azkaban. But Draco didn’t even honor him with a glance on their first day back in school or ever after. They shared a dorm and managed not to talk even once. Once Malfoy’s name appeared on that table on their wall, Harry imagined his endless complains about having to be in Potter’s presence all the time, thought that every day of his 8th year in Hogwarts would end in a fight with Malfoy. But he didn’t say a thing. Ever.</p>
<p>	Was Harry offended? No. He had other friends and mostly people were kind to him. And Draco did say thank you. He didn’t really expect any gratitude from Malfoy anyway. That’s now why he did what he did.</p>
<p>	But was he disappointed? A little. Concerned? Yeah…He couldn’t help it. He saw that happiness and relief on Draco’s face once Kingsley told him he was free. Malfoy looked as if the world was laying in front of his feet and he didn’t even have to reach to grab whatever he wanted. Harry just wanted him to look like that again. He wanted everyone who fought through this horror, who sacrificed their childhood to feel this way. Harry Potter was ready to die just so other people would get their second chances, including those people who made terrible mistakes, but deep inside regretted them and wanted to be better. Especially those people. </p>
<p>	But still, Malfoy remained as untouchable as ever. Harry’s rare signs of attention were completely ignored and often glances during classes were never returned. Draco acted cold, colder than ever. And that just sharpened Harry’s interest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Hey,-it was probably the first and only time Draco showed up in the dorm before Harry was already asleep. Actually, Potter had no solid proof Malfoy had ever slept in his bed before. He laid down when Harry was already deep in his dreams, woke up before Potter finished watching them. But not today; 11pm on the clock and Draco falls into his bed, ignoring Harry’s greeting.</p>
<p>	Except for them two, the room was absolutely empty. Harry was sitting on his bed, finishing his History of Magic homework. But every once in a while, he looked up at Draco. Only snow-white hair could be seen from under the covers. His chest was slowly raising, but Harry didn’t hear even Draco’s breath and couldn’t help but think that Malfoy was fake-sleeping solely to avoid talking to him. </p>
<p>	Over that half an hour it took Harry to give up on his essay and put it away, Draco really fell asleep. Potter tried to be as quiet as he could not to wake him up. Still he knew that any minute know laughing Anthony and Ernie will storm in and ruin his sleep. </p>
<p>	But before that could happen, Harry got under covers himself. He laid down and starred into the ceiling, counting spots and cracks on it. This year was so…weird. Harry felt a little out of place. There was nothing to do, nothing to fight for and it was a strange, unfamiliar feeling. Life didn’t feel like his anymore. He tried not to think about the future, but it was impossible. Potter’s future profession was a closed case for almost everyone who knew him. Kingsley announced it publicly that Auror Academy’s doors are always open for Harry Potter, since there is no other man with his skills, and most importantly his heart. Harry didn’t agree at all. His intention wasn’t to show some extra fake modesty, but he just couldn’t, didn’t want to take all credit for Voldemort’s fall. Whenever someone brought that up (which happened way more often than Harry would want), Potter replied with infamous “Yes, but…”</p>
<p>“Yes, but I wasn’t alone”</p>
<p>“Yes, but Ron and Hermione did just as much”</p>
<p>“Yes, but those who had to stay in Hogwarts, they are the real heroes”</p>
<p>“Yes, but so many people died trying to protect me”</p>
<p>        The ghosts of Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Dumbledore, Snape, Fred, even Cedrick wouldn’t stop haunting Harry. He couldn’t feel any satisfaction from the defeat, knowing that Teddy Lupin will never meet his parents. Knowing that Amos Diggory had to bury his own child. Knowing that George Weasley will never be able to look into his own reflection without a second thought. </p>
<p>	A loud gasp tore Harry away from sad thoughts. He looked up and saw Draco sitting on his bed, trying to catch a breath.</p>
<p>-Are you okay?-Harry asked. Malfoy nodded, looking anything but okay. A nightmare, classic post war symptom. Harry gets them too,-Bad dream?</p>
<p>-What?-Draco asked through deep breaths.</p>
<p>-You…You had a nightmare?</p>
<p>-Very observant, Potter,-Draco got up and walked out of the dorm, not looking back. Harry saw him out. Without realizing it, he waited for Draco to come back. A minute turned into 5. Then into 10 and 15. When 20 minutes had passed, Harry started getting not worried, but a little concerned. He decided to give Malfoy 5 more minutes to get back. But when they passed and his bed remained empty, Harry got up, opened his messed-up luggage and almost at the bottom of it found the Marauder’s Map.</p>
<p>	With a quiet sigh he pointed his wand at it and whispered the sacred words. A very detailed map of Hogwarts opened up in front of him. He saw himself, saw Ron surrounded by Hermione, Dean and some Hufflepuff student in the common room. He kept looking until his eyes stumbled on Malfoy’s name. Draco was in boys’ bathroom, just like Harry expected. The problem is, he wasn’t alone. In concerning proximity to him there were 4 ex-Ravenclaw students, now their course-mates. And during those 10 seconds it took Harry to correlate their names with their faces, he remembered the fact that made him jump from his bed, throw on the invisibility cloak and run to the said bathroom.</p>
<p>	Names on the map didn’t move, only Harry’s was getting closer and closer to them. The door was shut closed, but Harry opened it. Just slightly, for now. None of the present noticed it and Harry started listening.</p>
<p>	Draco was slammed against the door. Not fighting back at all, he was still held by 3 pretty strong looking Ravenclaws. Their “leader”, Michael Harris was standing in front of Draco, looking at him with rage and excitement in his eyes. Draco looked back at him with a cold smirk and confident stare Harry was starting to miss.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-If you could actually do anything to me, you would have already done it,-Draco spit out.</p>
<p>-You think so? Death Eater?-Malfoy rolled his eyes.</p>
<p>-Come up with something new, Harris. I’m getting bored.</p>
<p>-Oh, I bet you were having fun back then, weren’t you? You enjoyed it? Killing, torturing? Having your Lord right in your house?-Draco didn’t say anything to that, but his face had changed. Harry could see how much effort it took him not to punch the idiot in the face,-I know everything about you, Malfoy. You should be locked away.</p>
<p>-You think you know me?</p>
<p>-Yeah. You’re pathetic and weak. Found someone to get you out of Azkaban. Who was it by the way?</p>
<p>-Well, if you know so much about me, I’m sure you already know who that mysterious stranger is,-Malfoy smirked again,-And if I’m so pathetic and weak, how come you need three of your buddies just to hold me back?-Draco’s words were met with a harsh, strong punch right into his stomach. Ravenclaws didn’t let him fall down, but his face twisted in pain. Dave Griffin, one of Michael’s friends, threw an unsure glance at him, but Harris was losing his temper with every second and didn’t notice it.</p>
<p>-Who got you out? Tell me!-he grabbed Draco by the collar of his shirt,-Who did it?!</p>
<p>-Why the hell do you care so much?-Draco asked, voice weaker</p>
<p>-Because my parents are dead because of you and people like you. You all deserve to rot in Azkaban!,-he raised his fist for another punch, but before it could meet Draco’s face, Harry pushed the door open, throwing the cloak off beforehand.</p>
<p>-Four on one, Harris?-Harry asked with his loudest strictest voice,-Very noble.</p>
<p>-What do you want, Potter?-he asked. His friends were clearly confused and almost let Draco go.</p>
<p>-Leave him alone</p>
<p>-This is none of your business, hero,-he said with a smirk,-I’m doing your work, actually.</p>
<p>-Oh really? Maybe if you had done any work during the war, we’d win faster,-Harry approached Draco and grabbed his hand. No one dared to keep holding him back,-Say hello to McGonagall for me, you all will see her very soon,-without looking at anyone in the room, even Draco, he rushed out of the room, still hand in hand with him. Malfoy was still too shocked to react, but once they reached dormitories, he woke up and pushed Harry away.</p>
<p>-Are you spying on me again, Potter? Hadn’t dropped your heroic tendencies yet?,-he said to Harry, and Potter knew it was the closest thing he’d get to a thank you,-I don’t like it when they’re directed at me.</p>
<p>-I don’t like your tendencies of getting into trouble,-Potter replied,-You could tell them it was me.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-That I testified. You could tell them.</p>
<p>-I’m more than okay with no one knowing. Can’t help but brag a little?-Draco approached his bed.</p>
<p>-That’s not…,-Harry groaned,-They wouldn’t beat you up, if you told them!</p>
<p>-That’s not beating up, Potter,-Draco scoffed and got into his bed, marking an end of this conversation. Harry stood there for another second, just trying to process what just happened, and laid down too. Sleep hadn’t come relatively soon to either of them</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I don't know what to say, here's a new part. Thank you for your kudos and comments, feedback means a lot to me!<br/>Hope you enjoyed :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>That late-night incident remained a secret between Draco and Harry. They never talked about, just both of them woke up with a thought that no one should ever know about what had happened. The only other person who found out was obviously Headmistress McGonagall after Harry kept his promise to Ravenclaws and gave her the list of their names. Seeing the disappointment on her face hurt as her illusions about union and harmony among 8th year students fell apart, but it was better than letting the attackers walk unpunished. </p>
<p>	Malfoy himself was always good at acting as if bad stuff hadn’t happened at all, when he needed to. In the morning he didn’t even look at Harry, walked out of the common room, ignoring Potter’s “Good morning”. However, it did attract the attention of everyone else in the room, including Ron, who looked at Harry as if he had just blown a kiss to Voldemort himself.</p>
<p>	Harry didn’t care. That attack he accidentally witnessed made him ten times more interested in Draco’s life and condition. What he knew was that his father’s sentence in Azkaban wouldn’t let him see his son anytime soon, and his mother had been MIA ever since the end of the war. Harry didn’t believe that a woman like Narcissa, the I-will-risk-my-life-and-lie-to-Voldemort-to-save-my-son one, could just abandon him. But still, Malfoy was obviously very lonely and needed someone to help him cope with everything he had been, and still is going through. At least that’s what Harry thought.</p>
<p>	But that didn’t mean Draco would welcome Potter into his almost non-existent inner circle with open arms. If Harry didn’t know any better, he’d assume Malfoy was onto something again, that’s how suspiciously quiet he was, and every time these thoughts kept coming back, Harry had to wake himself up, remind himself that the time when he could easily be betrayed by anyone and no one could be trusted was gone. Sometimes it was hard to realize and keep in mind that he was safe. Sometimes even a simple headache from studying too long gave him huge panic attacks; Harry couldn’t tell if it was the scar that ached or not. </p>
<p>-Okay, Quidditch tryouts are tomorrow, who do you think will be the captain?-Ron jumped onto the seat between Harry and Hermione during the breakfast. Potter’s drink inevitably spilled right on his bacon, but Ron was too distracted by making out with his girlfriend to notice. By the time they finished, Harry already swapped their plates, waiting for Ron’s reaction as he tries pumpkin flavored bacon.<br/>

-Not me,-he replied to Weasley’s question and it took Ron a second to remember what was it he had asked.</p>
<p>-Why not?-Ron grabbed a fork and started stuffing his mouth with food, still talking and not even noticing that anything was wrong,-You were a good captain back then, you were just…distracted,-Hermione nodded, but decided not to add whatever was on her mind. When Ron and Harry talked about Quidditch, she tried not to interfere. She considered those conversation boring and pointless.</p>
<p>-Anyway, I’m not interested. I’ll try to get the Seeker, but nothing more,-Harry replied, pouring himself another cup of juice and putting it as far away from Ron as possible.</p>
<p>-Well, you will get the Seeker, that’s not even a question, mate,-Ron smirked.</p>
<p>-What do you mean?</p>
<p>-You think anyone else will try out for that position? Dare to challenge the Great Harry Potter,-Hermione chuckled and Harry kicked Ron’s leg under the table, slightly blushing,- I don’t think anyone who used to be a Seeker is studying with us,-Ron added.</p>
<p>-Malfoy,-Harry said,-He was Slytherin’s Seeker.</p>
<p>-Don’t worry about him. Even if he dares to try, you will defeat him. You’ve done it before,-Harry’s eyes automatically moved to the edge of the table. Draco was sitting all alone, piercing his food with a fork, looking down. Even exceptionally hot September couldn’t force Malfoy into losing the long sleeves and Harry knew why. He sighed and looked back at Ron and Hermione, who were already having their own conversation. Ron made her laugh and Hermione gently touched his hand, smiling and shining with happiness. Harry was happy for them. Of course he was. </p>
<p>	It just…It didn’t really make him feel any better when his friends didn’t notice him if he left the table earlier, for example. Or stopped waiting for him to get to the class together. Harry understood it all. Love, what can they do? They stopped noticing everyone and everything except for each other, and had every right to. There was no reason to look after each other now, everyone was safe, and if one of them gets late for the class, it’s because they slept in, not because they were kidnapped.</p>
<p>	But still, sometimes Harry wished he also had someone to get lost in. A person who occupies your entire mind, at least for a while erasing all your worries and fears. All 8th year students were allowed to go to Hogsmeade by themselves any time on the weekends, and Harry didn’t even have anyone to invite. </p>
<p>	Of course, there still was Ginny. This amazing, almost perfect girl, who was there for him from the beginning, who was simple and even easy to love. Harry probably could love her, if he tried. But he didn’t want to try. He wanted to have what Ron and Hermione have, something so fantastic that makes actual magic seem boring. Ginny just wasn’t his person and Harry didn’t want to waste her time. She deserved better. The problem remained that he had to say all of this to her. And to be honest, defeating Voldemort was less scary.</p>
<p>	The Saturday before Quidditch auditions that ex-Gryffindor trio decided to spend in Hogsmeade promised to be bright. There was a lot to discuss, even except for Ron’s favorite topic, Quidditch. Headmistress just announced that there would be a Ball right before Christmas break. A Ball. Again. Harry could have sworn that he heard the whole school groan once McGonagall told them about it. She said it would be useful for students to have a little fun, a little celebration after the war. Harry thought it was an unnecessary reminder of two things. First, the said war. Second, Harry has no one to invite.</p>
<p>-Are you going to ask Ginny?-Ron asked Harry carefully, as they were walking to Gladrags Wizardwear, Ron needed a new pair of trousers . Harry was kicking falling leaves with his feet, deeply inhaling the most perfect smell of the autumn. It rained the day before and it felt like everything outside was reborn. Harry wished it was the same with people. Go through sad times, walk out more beautiful and new than ever.</p>
<p>-I…I don’t know yet. Do I have to invite anyone?</p>
<p>-Most likely,-Hermione answered and took Ron’s hand as he was getting angry.</p>
<p>-You have to talk to her at least, you know? She’s waiting</p>
<p>-I know, Ron!-Harry raised his voice, though he didn’t plan to. He would rather talk about Quidditch again,-This stupid ball is more than 3 months away, do we have to talk about this now?-Ron mumbled something rude under his breath and the topic was changed. But the mood had changed completely too. Harry was looking for an opportunity to bail and leave the love-birds alone, which, according to Harry, was probably what they wanted anyway.</p>
<p>-I’ll catch up with you later,-Harry said as they passed The Three Broomsticks without stopping in it. He thought he had seen a familiar figure in the window, and decided to use it as an excuse to distant himself. Ron shrugged, not very upset with Harry leaving them. Hermione asked if everything was okay and after getting a positive answer didn’t insist on anything and walked away. </p>
<p>	Harry stopped in front of the pub and looked inside through the window. Yes, that’s what he thought. Malfoy was sitting all alone at the table in the corner of the room. He had a glass of butterbeer in front of him and was staring outside through the glass, thankfully not noticing Harry. </p>
<p>	Harry couldn’t tell if his face was sad or just peaceful. Still, he had an impossible urge to go up to him. Turns out he wasn’t the only one. Michael Harris and his little company slowly walked towards Draco, whispering something to one another. Once Harry saw those sly smirks and evil stares, he flew into the pub, pushing his way through the crowd full of bored teenagers and overtook the Ravenclaws. Potter basically fell into the seat opposite to Draco’s in the least graceful way possible, making Draco jump.</p>
<p>-Potter? What the hell?-Harry looked around and not noticing anyone, looked back at Draco with an awkward smile.</p>
<p>-What’s up, Malfoy? What are you doing?-he asked in a friendly tone that was clearly a little fake.</p>
<p>-Same question,-Draco answered, still a bit shocked.</p>
<p>-I’ve just been walking around with...</p>
<p>-No,-he cut Potter off,-What are you doing here? At my table?</p>
<p>-Well, did you buy it? It’s not like I’m interrupting anything.</p>
<p>-That’s none of your business.</p>
<p>-Oh, really? Were you expecting anyone? A date?-Harry gasped, but Draco just rolled his eyes. Potter called for a waitress and ordered two more glasses of butterbeer, ignoring Draco’s rejections.</p>
<p>-So,-Harry started as an older witch took their order,-Ready for tomorrow?</p>
<p>-What’s tomorrow?-Harry held himself back from making a very obvious but very stupid joke, thinking that there is no way Malfoy would approve of it and reminded him about Quidditch tryouts.</p>
<p>-I’m not going,-Draco said and looked into the window.</p>
<p>-Yes, you are,-Harry said.</p>
<p>-I’m not.</p>
<p>-You are! There’s no other Seeker, are you kidding?</p>
<p>-There is. You,-their butterbeers arrived and Draco finally had something to do with his hands.</p>
<p>-Except for me. It won’t be fair, if it’s just me,-Draco shrugged indifferently,-Come on, Malfoy. You have to try!</p>
<p>-For what? They’ll choose you anyway.</p>
<p>-Why? Who flies better and catches the snitch gets the position,-Draco almost laughed at Harry’s naivety,-What?</p>
<p>-That’s sweet. You actually think any kind of rules still apply to you!</p>
<p>-Not funny, Malfoy,-Harry mumbled. That was exactly the type of conversation he hated.</p>
<p>-I wasn’t joking.</p>
<p>-Okay, listen,-Harry looked straight into Draco’s eyes,-I promise you a fair competition if you show up. Just you and me, same school broomsticks, who catches the snitch becomes the Seeker. You’re in?</p>
<p>-Why do you think I even want it?</p>
<p>-Because first of all, it’s not like there is much going on in your life. Or in mine,-Draco looked down for a second,-And second of all, I don’t believe you can just hand this position to me. Not when we both now you’re equally as good, if not better,-Harry offered Malfoy his hand,-So? Are you in?</p>
<p>-Screw you, Potter, fine,-Draco shook Harry’s hand, holding back a smile. Harry wasn’t. He smiled brightly and sincerely.</p>
<p>-Cheers,-he raised his glass and Draco rolled his eyes,-To your defeat tomorrow.</p>
<p>-In your dreams, Potter,-they cheered, and this time even Draco couldn’t hold back a smile. Harry started laughing and Draco almost did too, but he accidentally looked into the window and froze.</p>
<p>-What?-Harry looked out and saw Ron and Hermione starring at them through the glass. Neither of them could tell for how long they were there, but judging by Ron’s red shocked face, it’s been long enough.</p>
<p>-I gotta go,-Harry jumped up,-Don’t you dare not show up tomorrow!-he said to Malfoy on his way out, preparing for one of the most uncomfortable conversations in his life.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey!<br/>Thank you so much for reading, hope you enjoyed:)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Just the fact that Harry had spent some time actually talking to Malfoy was enough to shock Ron to his core. Weasley kept asking what they were talking about and why, and how come the conversation ended with them shaking hands, cheering and smiling to each other, instead of turning the entire Three Broomsticks into a war zone. Harry just kept shrugging and making jokes. Something in him, something he wasn't yet ready to address, didn’t let him reveal their conversation to his friends, as innocent as it was. Hermione gave Potter her usual all-knowing, all-understanding glance and didn’t ask a thing. Harry didn’t even know whose reaction concerned him more.</p>
<p>Ron was careful with Harry till the end of the day, but on the next morning, the Quidditch tryouts morning, he was too excited to even remember what happened the day before. He was very serious in his intention to get his previous position, a Keeper. It was all he could talk about and even poor Hermione couldn’t stand listening to him for the whole morning, and during the breakfast, she, a little shamefacedly, sat next to Ginny.</p>
<p>	Harry, who had to stay and be the victim of Ron’s entire verbal diarrhea, only half-listened to him. He was looking around every five seconds, starring into the entrance of The Great Hall. From time to time he smiled and nodded to Ron, but his attention was actually occupied by something else. Someone else, actually.</p>
<p>	The tryouts were scheduled right after the breakfast, and Draco Malfoy seemed to have decided to skip both. He was nowhere to be seen at their table, and Harry would gladly go back to their common room to check on him, or even forcefully bring his skinny ass to the Quidditch field, but Ron dragged him out before Harry could even think of an excuse to go back. He hoped Malfoy would have enough decency to keep his yesterday’s promise.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Is everyone here?-Professor Hooch asked as the field started getting crowded. Half of their class was there, but once she checked the list, it turned out Malfoy was the only one missing. Potential members of Hogwarts’ newest Quidditch team lined up in front of the professor and waited for her orders,-As usual, Seekers are the last ones to try out, so Mister Malfoy still has some time. However, if he doesn’t get here in time, Mister Potter, the position is yours.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Harry nodded, but inside, he didn’t like it at all. Draco seemed pretty into the idea of challenging Harry yesterday, and despite everything that was still going on with him, Harry believed Malfoy wouldn’t miss that opportunity. But time passed, Chasers and Beaters were found. A couple people wanted to try out for a Keeper’s position, which would take approximately half an hour. Then it’s seeker’s turn.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I have to go,-Harry turned to Hermione as Ron stepped on the field.</p>
<p>-He will notice. And he will kill you,-Hermione answered in a calm voice, not asking Harry where and why he was going.</p>
<p>-Tell him I got nervous and had to throw up. And don’t let Professor Hooch just hand me this position,-Harry said and ran towards the castle. He didn’t turn around once, too afraid to see Ron’s disappointed eyes on him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Harry ran through empty halls, looking out of every window he came across. Ron was still up in the air, but Harry had no idea how well he was doing. He knew that he was supposed to be there and his conscious was screaming inside of him. Harry was supposed to be cheering for Ron, yelling “Ron Weasley is our king”, being a proper damn friend. But no, he’s running across the entire Hogwarts, to check on a guy who couldn’t give less of a shit about him. </p>
<p>	Harry stopped to catch a breath before entering the common room when he heard voices coming out from the closed door. There were two people talking, one of them was Malfoy, the other was some woman Harry couldn’t yet recognize.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-You’re not even trying to understand,-Draco said to her, downhearted. Harry knew this conversation wasn’t meant for his ears, but he couldn’t just chime in now! And leaving after making all of this way was stupid too. </p>
<p>-Draco, please,-a quiet female voice made Harry get even closer to the door to hear it.</p>
<p>-There is no point of me staying here!-Draco yelled</p>
<p>-That’s not true. Ministry…</p>
<p>-Ministry couldn’t care less about me! Or any of us! They wanted me out of their hair, locking me up in this school was just another way!</p>
<p>-We can’t just disobey their orders, honey,-Harry could have sworn he heard Draco scoffing.</p>
<p>-Easy for you to say, mother. You’re living your best life. I’m stuck here all alone,-he said.</p>
<p>-I’m sorry. I can’t take you with me now. If I could, you’d already be here,-Narcissa Malfoy had a very thin, apologetic tone. It was hard to correspond the voice Harry was hearing with the actual woman it belonged to. Or at least her image in Harry’s head. He doubted he had ever heard a Malfoy, any of them, being this vulnerable.</p>
<p>-You don’t have to take me with you! I could start working on saving the Manor</p>
<p>-There’s nothing to save, Draco,-Narcissa cut off her son. Him mentioning the Manor seemed to have woken her up. Draco’s mother now sounded firm and strict.</p>
<p>-We can’t just give up on it. It’s our home!</p>
<p>-Is it? I don’t want to go back there,-for a few seconds Draco remained silent. Harry just stood there, with no idea what to do. He had already forgotten about Ron, or Quidditch, or why he was there in the first place. He waited for Draco to say something, and accidentally touched the doorknob, that inevitably made a sound that Malfoy couldn’t help but notice. During that fraction of a second, Harry already cursed whoever had built and rebuilt Hogwarts. Why would there even be any doorknobs when the doors are opened by passwords?</p>
<p>-I have to go,-Draco mumbled and Harry heard approaching steps. He looked around and saw an absolutely empty hall that literally welcomed him to use it as an escape plan. But Harry decided not to. With a heart beating way too fast, he waited for what was to come. Draco opened the door and looked right at Potter. His face was red, so were his eyes. He starred ahead of himself with pure rage mixed with sadness. So much sadness.</p>
<p>-How much did you hear?-he asked.</p>
<p>-N-nothing,-Harry answered,-I just came here,-Draco sighed and went back to the common room. Harry followed him and closed the door after them. The fireplace was slowly going out, Draco sat down on the couch closest to the window.</p>
<p>-Who were you talking to?-Harry asked, carefully approaching him. Draco was so obviously holding back tears that Harry’s conscious was eating him up alive for even being there.</p>
<p>-My mother,-Draco answered. Harry took a seat on the chair opposite to Draco.</p>
<p>-Is she okay?</p>
<p>-She’s spectacular,-Draco answered putting so much pain, rage and childish, fake hatred to his mother into his words. Tears started shining in his eyes again,-Living her best life with her friends in France.</p>
<p>-Oh,-Draco finally looked at Harry.</p>
<p>-Did you know that if you want to divorce a husband who’s in Azkaban, you don’t even need his awareness? They probably think he will die anyway,-a couple of tears fell down his eyes. Harry didn’t know how to react. If it was Ron or Hermione crying in front of him, he’d hug them, tell them he loved them and that they will go through it together. What was he supposed to say to Malfoy? </p>
<p>-I’m…I’m sorry,-Draco looked at Harry as if he just remembered he was there.</p>
<p>-Potter, what are you doing here?-he asked.</p>
<p>-I came to get you. Quidditch,-Harry nodded at the window, realizing how ridiculous he looked now.</p>
<p>-I’m not in a mood,-Harry didn’t know whether he should just drop it, or keep pushing Draco. Either way, he couldn’t just leave him alone.</p>
<p>-Yes, and Quidditch always used to cheer you up,-Harry said, as if he knew the first thing about what cheers up Draco Malfoy,-Come on, don’t let me win without a fight.</p>
<p>-Potter, I don’t care, okay?! Leave me alone,-Draco spat out. Harry took a deep breath, got up and sat next to Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Okay, I did hear something from your conversation with your mom,-Draco looked as if he was ready to kill him,-I’m sorry! I just…I did come here to get you outside! Skipped Ron’s tryouts for you,-he mumbled,-What I wanted to say is that I don’t know anything about your mother as a person. But I know one thing. Your mother’s love to you was enough to stop a war. She wants only the best for you. Draco,-he added, and maybe that, or maybe Draco’s shocked eyes starring into his, gave him goosebumps. Harry felt his cheeks warming up.</p>
<p>-If we go now, we’ll make it to the tryouts,-Harry said after Draco stayed silent for too long.</p>
<p>-You are literally the most stubborn person I had ever had misfortune to meet. Ever,-Draco said. Harry smiled and they both got up. Neither of them talked until the reached the Quidditch field, but both felt way more comfortable to be in each other’s company now. Harry was glad he’d said what he said. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Mister Potter!-Professor Hooch attacked them the minute Draco and Harry showed up on the field,-Do you think none of us have anything better to do than wait for you the whole day?</p>
<p>-I’m sorry, Professor, it was my fault,-Harry stepped up immediately, not giving Draco even a chance to open his mouth,-Can we still try out? Please?</p>
<p>-Fine,-she sighed,-Grab the brooms, I’ll throw the snitch,-more than a half of the crowd was already gone. Harry, still afraid to meet eyes with Ron, just grabbed two relatively same school broomsticks, threw one to Draco and waited.</p>
<p>-Please don’t make it long,-Hooch asked. The snitch flew up into the sky. Two pairs of eyes followed it. Draco already looked fresh, sober, ready to fight. It made Harry smile.</p>
<p>-One,-Hooch started,-Two! Three! Go!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Two figures flew up with impressive speed. Old school broomsticks were annoying, but Harry quickly made his peace with it. He saw Draco on the opposite side of the field. Their eyes were hectically searching for a small golden dot in the sky, but it moved too fast. Harry heard someone screaming his name from the tribunes, but it only distracted him. He almost met eyes with Draco when Malfoy suddenly flew to his right. He was like a bullet, eyes concentrated on his goal. Harry immediately followed him. His instincts took over, instincts of a pretty damn good seeker. He saw a snitch. Draco was closer, but nothing was over yet. Harry could already feel a small sphere in his hand, his heart was beating out of his chest. And when Potter finally overtook Draco, snitch made a sharp turn to the left. And Draco was the first one to react.</p>
<p>	He fell off the broom. Fortunately, the height wasn’t big enough for him to get hurt. By the time Harry landed next Draco, Malfoy was shockingly starring at the round object in his hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I did it,-he whispered, not believing himself. Professor Hooch quickly approached them, looked at the snitch in Draco’s hand, nodded and wrote something down in her pad.</p>
<p>-Congratulations, Mister Malfoy. The team is formed, your captain will schedule the date of the first training session,-she said, glad that she could finally wrap this up, and left. Draco hadn’t even moved.</p>
<p>-You did it!-Harry fell on the grass next to Draco and chuckled. He was even happier than how he would have been If it was him holding a snitch right now. </p>
<p>-Did you play along?!-Draco looked at Harry,-Be honest, Potter!</p>
<p>-No, no, I swear I didn’t. All you, Malfoy,-he smiled. Draco took a deep breath and chuckled,-Congratulations, Mister Seeker,-Harry got up, offered Draco his hand to get up too. Malfoy looked at it for a second, took it and got on his feet. The crowd around them was booing disappointedly. If either Harry or Draco cared enough to look around, they’d see how they were the only people on the field happy with the way these tryouts ended.</p>
<p>-Thank you, loser,-Harry smirked. By the time they realized they were still holding hands, Ron and Hermione approached them.</p>
<p>-Hey, Harry,-Hermione carefully called him out,-Are you okay?</p>
<p>-Yeah, of course,-Harry said, still smiling ear to ear,-Why?</p>
<p>-You just…lost,-she said.</p>
<p>-Oh…Yeah. It was fair,-he shrugged. Draco didn’t say anything,-What about you, Ron?</p>
<p>-I’m in. The captain, actually,-Hermione smiled proudly as Ron said it.</p>
<p>-Really? This is amazing!-Ron didn’t look so excited anymore,-I mean, you totally deserve it. I’m very proud of you,-Draco felt like he should leave them alone. He wasn’t a part of this. Wasn’t supposed to be.</p>
<p>-Yeah. Thought we’d have another year playing together,-Ron said in a disappointed tone,-The training’s on Tuesday after the Potions. Don’t be late,-Ron said to Draco and walked away. Hermione stayed.</p>
<p>-He noticed you left right away,-she said,-I lied, he didn’t believe it.</p>
<p>-He’s not…that mad, right?</p>
<p>-Well,-Hermione sighed,-Give him some time. Congratulations, Malfoy,-she said to Draco and walked towards the castle. Harry and Draco went back together, talking about their little “duel”. Malfoy wasn’t really the type to brag, it was mostly Harry who kept bringing up the game, amazed and impressed by his own loss. Draco just listened to him, nodded, and smiled as he saw sparkles of joy in Potter’s eyes.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello, everyone!<br/>Hope you're all doing well &lt;3<br/>Please tell me what you thought about this chapter!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once the Hogwarts sank into the darkness and silence of the night, Harry finally laid down in his warm soft bed, hopeful to fall asleep right away. The night had other plans, and Potter stayed up for quite some time then. The day full of events flew in front of his eyes. He wondered how the hell he managed to miss that snitch. He had every opportunity to catch it, for years he considered himself a good Seeker - better than Malfoy – and a couple years ago even a thought of such scenario would’ve been insulting. But when his fancy broom was gone and the entire school wasn’t cheering for him, Potter lost. For 6 years Quidditch had been an integral part of his school life, now it was gone. It was a weird realization. But what surprised Harry more is that he wasn’t even that upset.</p><p>	Analyzing every bit of Harry’s feelings to understand why did Quidditch went down on his list of things that mattered to him was hard, if not impossible. Also, pretty stupid. Maybe he was glad to lose even more pressure, put the responsibility of the “youngest, most promising” Seeker on Draco’s shoulders. Malfoy needed that win way more anyway. That he knew for sure.</p><p>	Maybe Quidditch will become the thing that will make Draco want to stay. Harry knew Malfoys didn’t like being told what to do, and if it wasn’t for Ministry, Draco definitely wouldn’t be here. He feels like he’s wasting time. And since there’s really nothing better to do, Harry can at least try to prove him wrong.</p><p>	Because Draco is lonely. Because he feels like the whole world had turned its back on him. Because he is desperate, insecure and lost. And though Malfoy would rather die than admit any of it, he doesn’t really have to, not to Harry. It takes one to know one, right?</p><p>	Harry knew loneliness first hand. Maybe Draco’s parents weren’t dead, but they couldn’t be with him now when he needed them. And unlike Potter he never had a big loud happy family of a friend to give him a home when he needed it. Never had friends that would give up on anything for him and follow him till the very end. And seeing that, Harry, who had spent most of his life assured in his own absolute loneliness, now knew how wrong he was. </p><p>	Draco though still avoided him all day all week. Still ignored Potter’s attempts to start a conversation. Still was so unbelievably distant and even oblivious to everything around him, not just Harry. A new Quidditch position calmed his detractors down a bit, but it wasn’t enough. Just as Draco expected, no one really took pleasure in being his teammate. Ron was the only one who didn’t speak or act on it – captain’s duties didn’t let him – but the rest of the team never missed an opportunity to mention here and there how Draco “stole” that position and how much “like him” it was. From time to time Draco thought about quitting, giving people what they want. But the last remaining bits of his pride wouldn’t let him. He couldn’t just let them win and every other day came to the Quidditch field and did his absolute best. To prove people wrong, to prove himself worthy to himself. Not to give up. </p><p> Harry also started coming to his Quidditch training sessions. Thankfully, he had a solid cover through Ron. He could tell he was there to support his friend. Or to help him, he knew what it’s like to be a captain. His actual motives were a little more complicated. He came to steal a couple of minutes before they’d start to wish Malfoy luck, just to get a confused nod from him. Or to at least try to stop those endless fights and conflicts. He never jumped to defend Malfoy though, even if he wanted to. He knew how Draco would react, more importantly he knew how the rest of the team would react. It would only cause more problems.</p><p>So instead Harry would bring his homework and complete it listening to screams and rare laughter coming from the field. This way he also felt as if Quidditch was still a part of his life. It reminded him of the first time he caught a snitch. Or of that ridiculous story that actually got him on the team. Which also happened because of Draco. Huh.</p><p> </p><p>-I’m a horrible captain,-Ron said to Harry as they walked back into the castle after one of the trainings. It was late September, there was a little over two weeks before the first game of the season with Hufflepuffs. Ron started getting nervous. And when Ron gets nervous, he starts doubting himself.</p><p>-That’s not true, Ron,-Harry assured him, truly meaning it. Back in his time he didn’t like being captain at all and definitely knew how hard it was. He remembered how on his 6th year, Oliver’s and Angelina’s behavior stopped seeming so weird. They were actually pretty goof at holding it together.</p><p>-Of course it’s true,-Ron groaned but quickly calmed down once he saw Draco walking by,-I can’t even handle this stupid ferret!-he whispered once Draco was far enough. Harry smiled.</p><p>-Don’t measure your skills by whether or not you can handle Malfoy,-they reached the castle and started moving up the stairs, that always changed direction, but Harry stopped noticing it long ago.</p><p>-Why did you have to let him win, Harry? The victory would already be ours if you were the seeker!</p><p>-I didn’t let him win, I’ve told you already,-Harry said,-It was a fair game,-friends were already approaching the common room. Harry mumbled the new password “Amaryllis” and the door opened.</p><p>-I’m sorry, mate, but I can’t imagine a fair game with you losing to…,-Ron got quiet once he looked into the room. Ginny was sitting on their couch, clearly waiting for someone. Ron and Harry froze. Harry wanted to run.</p><p>-I…I’m gonna check on Hermione…in the library,-Ron mumbled and took off. Harry saw him out with eyes filled with jealousy.</p><p>-Hi, Harry,-Ginny smiled and nodded at a place next to her. Her voice sounded calm and friendly,-Are you free now?</p><p>-Y-yes,-Harry slowly walked towards the couch. By the time he reached it he noticed that the room was almost empty, only Malfoy was quietly writing something at the table next to the fireplace. Probably the only person Ginny didn’t manage to kick out.</p><p>-I wanted to talk to you,-she said once Harry finally sat down,-Alone, but this was the closest I could get,-she threw a venomous glance at Draco, who remained absolutely uninterested in what was going on.</p><p>-Okay,-Harry said. It’s not that he was afraid of this conversation (and he already knew what kind of conversation it was). He just wanted to postpone it as much as he could. Maybe if they don’t rush with it, Harry will figure out what was going on inside of him. Ginny had every right for clarity. Harry just…didn’t have it yet.</p><p>-How are you doing?-she asked. And Harry realized that they hadn’t even talked properly since the beginning of the year. He definitely had been avoiding her,-I heard you didn’t make it to a Quidditch team.</p><p>-Yeah, it’s fine. I’m fine. How are you?</p><p>-Harry, I’m sure you know what I wanted to talk about,-Ginny lowered her voice almost to whisper. But the room was so quiet, Harry was sure Draco still could hear her, if he wanted. Does he want to?</p><p>-I…I don’t…</p><p>-I can handle a no from you, you know? I’ve done it before,-Ginny said and a sad smile bloomed on her beautiful lips. Harry felt like an idiot. An idiot who was breaking the heart of the most perfect girl he had ever met, a girl he definitely didn’t deserve. </p><p>-I’ve never…</p><p>-Yes, you’ve never actually rejected me, but come on. You knew I liked you since the day we met. But you only started noticing me when I’ve moved on,-Ginny said. Harry had nothing to resist with. She was right.</p><p>-I don’t know what to say,-he decided to be honest.</p><p>-Do you still like me? Do you still want…this?-Ginny asked. Her straight-forwardness amazed and terrified Harry at the same time. He could never just come up to a person and ask if they like him. </p><p>-Of course I like you,-Harry said, which was god’s truth. Still, he felt very uncomfortable talking about his feelings. Especially with the third party present,-But…</p><p>-Listen, I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want. I just want things to be clear between us, okay?-she asked, not a single sad note in her voice.</p><p>-I’m sorry, Ginny. I just…I don’t think I’m ready for it now,-Harry sighed. How much he wanted Ginny to believe him now. How much he feared she’d think of his words just as a lame excuse,-But I still want you in my life. I really want you to be my friend.</p><p>-Of course I’ll be your friend, Potter,-Ginny smiled and her smile really seemed to be sincere. She reached to hug Harry, and that hug really set him free. It took off another pile of pressure off of his chest. Potter almost felt like he could fly.</p><p>-Oh, I forgot to tell you,-she said after letting him go,-When you all had a Quidditch training, McGonagall announced some Career Orientation sessions or something. She’ll basically talk to us about our future and what profession we should choose. It’s for 7th and 8th year. Tell the rest, okay?-she got up.</p><p>-Sure. Thank you, Ginny. A lot,-Weasley winked and disappeared behind the door. Normally, people feel sadness and pain after such conversations. Harry felt hopefulness. And something told him Ginny felt the same. Or almost the same. He truly cared for Ginny, saw her as a family. Loved her. Just not in the way he was expected to.</p><p>	Harry got up and looked around. His eyes fell on Malfoy, who didn’t seem to move at all since Harry showed up.</p><p>-Eavesdropping, Malfoy?-Harry asked playfully.</p><p>-Believe it or not, I have zero interest in your pathetic love life,-Draco mumbled without looking up from his homework.</p><p>-How come I never noticed how charming you are?-Harry joked and left to room to find Ron and Hermione. Draco breathed out once the door closed behind Potter. Very tips of his ears got slightly red and a small, silly smile appeared on his lips.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On the next morning the usual noise and chatter that flew over the great hall during the breakfast reached its peak. Graduates, who now made up a significant percent of the Hogwarts population, discussed their future plans with one another, preparing for their Career Orientation sessions. The trio wasn’t an exception, except Ron didn’t see much sense in discussions, since all three of them had already made their choices. Hermione would go to the Ministry and do her best to fix all the injustice and make the world a better place, which, in her occasion, weren’t just empty ambitions.</p>
<p>	And of course, Ron and Harry were already expected in the Auror Academy. Weasley was very excited to spend another three years shoulder to shoulder with Harry, graduate to fight for peace, stop the evil and do the right thing. It was what they’d wanted for 4 years now. What they talked and daydreamed about. Except…</p>
<p>	When you literally die once and right after that kill your biggest enemy, it sort of changes the way you see things.  And after spending 7 years of your life, of your childhood, fighting, losing, fearing, seeing blood, seeing friends and family go before their time, seeing lives being destroyed, children turned into orphans, it can’t help but leave a mark on you.  One, that just won’t let you sign up for a lifetime of blood, pain and fights again. And of course the evil didn’t end with Voldemort and there was still a lot in this world to change, a lot to fight, but Harry had done his job, fulfilled his destiny, if you will. Why can’t someone else handle the rest? </p>
<p>	And while Ron was enthusiastically listing all the pros of being an auror, Harry tried to find a way to express all his feelings in words and deliver them to his best friend. He will understand, eventually, but Harry couldn’t - didn’t want to -  see that look of disappointment, even if it will only be there for a second. Instead, he kept nodding and agreeing, hating himself for his cowardice. Defeat Voldemort? Sure. Crash your friend’s dreams to study together again? Ugh…</p>
<p>	Headmistress McGonagall volunteered to host the sessions for most of the 8th graders, especially those she taught herself during their last years in Hogwarts. Every student had been given their own time to approach her office, each session was supposed to take less than half an hour and students were advised to at least try to prepare some ideas and plans for their future, just something to start with. Harry had no idea what he was going to talk about.</p>
<p>	It’s unlikely that it was an accident, but according to their schedule, Hermione, Ron and Harry went one after another, and as soon as their actual classes ended (academic aspect of that year was so simple and primitive that Hermione considered going up to McGonagall specifically to talk about that, but Ron convinced her to enjoy the simple life), three of them headed to the Headmistress’s office. Harry was visibly nervous and did his best to avoid any conversation. He had an idea on what kind of questions he will be asked - they had similar sessions back in 5th year - but didn’t know any answers. Back then McGonagall made a very dramatic and heartfelt promise to do everything she could to make Harry an auror. Is he about to disappoint her too?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-It’s my time,-Hermione said as one of the Hufflepuff 7th year students walked out of the office. She was holding a brochure that said “Astronomy! A new way to look at life!” and had a few tears on her eyes that contrasted with a big bright smile on her lips. The girl threw a hopeful glance around herself and ran towards her common room. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>	The door closed after Hermione and it was just Ron and Harry. There were a few other students, who decided that it’s better to be early than late. Harry wondered if Ron felt as awkward as he did. The second he was about to open his mouth and try to get rid of that awkwardness at least somehow, Draco Malfoy appeared out of nowhere. He saw Ron and Harry and stopped at considerable distance from them. Harry gave him a hardly noticeable smile. Draco returned even a less noticeable nod.</p>
<p>	In less the 10 minutes Hermione walked out of the room. She was holding at least 6 different brochures, each on everything slightly related to her field of interest. Reminding Ron about his turn, she went to the common room, eyes glued to one of the booklets. </p>
<p>	Once Ron disappeared behind the doors, Harry threw a sight at Draco. Malfoy was standing there, patiently starring into a wall.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-When’s your turn?-he flinched a little once Potter appeared next to him. But instead of replying, silently handed him his piece of paper with a number on it,-Right after me,-Draco nodded,-Do you already know what you want to do?</p>
<p>-Right now? Die,-Harry rolled his eyes,-I don’t,-Malfoy said eventually.</p>
<p>-Me neither,-Harry sighed</p>
<p>-Really?-Draco finally looked down at him,-What happened to future Head Auror?</p>
<p>-I don’t know. It’s not me,-he shrugged. Draco looked at him for a couple seconds and then looked away. He didn’t care. And that what made it was so easy to tell him. He didn’t have any expectations on Harry whatsoever and Harry could be himself, could tell all the truth, not just a part of it, could not fear disappointing him. It was…refreshing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Draco and Harry didn’t talk anymore. They just stood beside each other and waited for Ron to come out. And once he did, holding a “Auror: the most important job in the Wizarding World” brochure, Draco smirked and threw a weird glance at Potter. Harry looked at him with a plea/threat in his eyes, hoping Draco would get it and not open his mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-How did it go?-Harry asked when Ron approached him. Weasley was rather surprised to find him in such weird company, but decided not to act on it.</p>
<p>-Great,-Ron didn’t want to tell much in Malfoy’s presence and it was visible,-You’re next, Harry. Want me to wait for you?</p>
<p>-You don’t really have to,-Harry mumbled.</p>
<p>-It’s no bother,-Harry nodded awkwardly and stepped into Headmistress’ office. It hardly changed since the last moment Dumbledore had it. Maybe it felt a little more…strict. Minimalistic. Official. Minerva McGonagall drowned in Dumbledore’s huge old chair and once she saw Harry at the doors, she smiled and asked him to take a seat.</p>
<p>-Mister Potter,-McGonagall started and Harry thought that they had crossed the “last names” base a long ago,-How are you feeling? You seem tense.</p>
<p>-I’m fine, thank you,-Harry responded quickly.</p>
<p>-Ready to begin?-Potter nodded. McGonagall opened a rather thick binder full of Harry’s grades, academic and not achievements, professor’s comments and recommendations on him. She slowly turned pages, looking up on Harry from time to time, as if waiting for him to say something.</p>
<p>-If your desire to become an auror is still as strong as three years ago – or as strong as Mister Weasley’s – we won’t be here for long.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Harry could tell McGonagall already knew she was wrong. There was something about her smile that calmed Harry down. At least a little.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I think I…changed my mind,-Harry said and Minerva didn’t seem a single bit surprised </p>
<p>-May I ask why?</p>
<p>-I don’t know,-he sighed,-I just…want something different.</p>
<p>-Like what?</p>
<p>-I don’t know,-he looked down, embarrassed by his own indecisiveness. National Hero isn’t supposed to act this way. He’s supposed to always know what he wants and do whatever it takes to have it. </p>
<p>-Well, I wish I could say it was the first time I heard that,-the binder closed and Harry immediately felt more free and light,-Mister Potter, future profession is an extremely important decision. However, it doesn’t mean that you have to get it right on your first try.</p>
<p>-I don’t understand.</p>
<p>-What is one thing that makes you happy? One thing you would agree to do for the rest of your life?-she asked. Harry felt like a fool. What was he supposed to say? All I ever did was fighting Voldemort and playing Quidditch. "Sorry I never really had any hobbies"?</p>
<p>-I’m not sure.</p>
<p>-It’s absolutely okay. You know, when I heard that you all were offered an opportunity to come back to Hogwarts and graduate, I particularly hoped that you would take this offer, Harry.</p>
<p>-Why?</p>
<p>-Because I think you could use this year to find out what you want. Truly want. Where your hearts is,-McGonagall made a pause,-You still have time to think, a plenty of it. But if you want my opinion…</p>
<p>-Yes, please,-Harry doubted that Headmistress could recommend anything less than excellent. </p>
<p>-I’ve talked to many students who used to be members of Dumbledore’s Army,-McGonagall smiled. Warmly and motherly,-And to say the least, you exceed almost every Defense Against Dark Arts professor Hogwarts had seen in years,-Harry’s eyes sparkled. It was one of the best compliments he had heard in his life. And a couple seconds later, Harry finally understood what McGonagall was implying. </p>
<p>-Do you think I could…?-Harry didn’t dare to finish that sentence.</p>
<p>-Of course. Not right after your graduation, you can’t possibly expect me to hire an 18-year-old. But once you’ve gained some experience, some maturity…it would be an honor for Hogwarts and its future students,-Harry desperately blushed. He couldn’t believe McGonagall thought so highly of him,-Mister Potter, you don’t have to settle on this now. If you find something you like more, it’s great. I just want to give you a back-up plan. It’s always easier if you have one, right?</p>
<p>-Yes. Thank you. Thank you so much,-he thought about getting up and hugging her, but managed to hold himself back. </p>
<p>-Of course. Ask Mister Malfoy to come in next,-Harry nodded and rushed to the door, but once he almost reached it, he stopped.</p>
<p>-I’m sorry,-he approached the desk,-Can I…can I have one?-Harry pointed at the brochures.</p>
<p>-Any one you’d like,-Harry quickly grabbed Aurors’ brochure and without looking at McGonagall, disappeared behind the door. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Harry felt…refreshed. Hopeful. Optimistic. His breath was quick and short, as if he just ran a mile, Harry was desperate to tell someone about his conversation with McGonagall. But instead, he approached Ron, showed his Aurors’ brochure and smiled to him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Let’s go find Hermione,-Ron said, but Harry didn’t follow him.</p>
<p>-You go, I’ll catch you later,-he said as the door behind him closed again.</p>
<p>-Why?-Ron asked.</p>
<p>-I…I’ll wait here,-Harry asked and internally begged Ron to just leave already.</p>
<p>-For what?-he asked, but got the answer himself,-For Malfoy?</p>
<p>-Yes…</p>
<p>-Why?-Ron was deeply surprised. Harry just shrugged.</p>
<p>-Hermione is probably looking for you already,-he said awkwardly. Ron, still shocked, left. Harry sighed with relief mixed with a little bit of embarrassment. He had no idea what Ron must’ve been thinking. He didn’t even know what he was thinking when he decided to stay and wait for Draco. Just another stupid impulse he followed.  </p>
<p>	Meanwhile Malfoy himself had already entered McGonagall’s office, even more nervous than Harry was.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey.<br/>I wasn't sure if it was appropriate for me to post anything now, when everyone's attention should be directed towards something way more important. This update in no way disrespects POC community.<br/>Here's a link where you can find ways to help; donate, sign petitions or just educate yourself. Please visit it. We all should do our best to help. <br/>https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/<br/>Thank you!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>-Mister Malfoy, please take a seat. How are you feeling?-Draco mumbled something remotely similar to “fine” and sat down. McGonagall opened a new binder that was in front of her. Relatively smaller than Harry’s.</p>
<p>-So? Have you already decided on your future profession?-Draco shook his head and asked himself why he even bothered to come there,-No? Well, not a problem. Let’s take a look at your grades,-Headmistress gave Draco a small smile and started studying the material in front of her.</p>
<p>-I wanted to ask,-Draco spoke up finally. McGonagall looked it him,-Does it even...make sense?</p>
<p>-What does?</p>
<p>-Me making any decisions. Is it even…worth trying?</p>
<p>-Of course. What else do you plan to do after graduation?-her smile was so open and pure that for a second Draco thought that she actually had no idea what he was talking about. Or that his worries really didn’t have any ground.</p>
<p>-I mean...no one would hire me anyway,-he said, for now only opening up about the least of his concerns.</p>
<p>-Mister Malfoy,-McGonagall closed the binder with a sigh. She knew that possible unemployment was only the tip of the iceberg,-I would love to tell you that your past won't ever affect you or your future in any way and that there is nothing but happiness coming your way. Unfortunately, there isn't a single person in this school I can say that to,-she made a pause, watching Draco’s reaction, but he remained unconvinced,- What had happened to all of us couldn't help to leave impact. On ones worse than on others. Yet, that doesn’t mean we should just give up on ourselves.</p>
<p>-Yes, but…,-Draco wasn’t sure how to finish that sentence. He just hoped that McGonagall would still understand, because Malfoys don’t whine and pout, even when they’re convinced that their life is over.</p>
<p>-I think you will agree with me when I say that you are one of the brightest representatives of your Hogwarts House. You have always had enough ambitions, your leadership skills are very high, you are obviously very cunning and resourceful young man,-Draco wasn’t sure where she was going with this,-If I’m not mistaken, it took the sorting hat less than a second to put you into Slytherin. Right?</p>
<p>-Well, yes</p>
<p>-I’ve had pleasure to work with many great Slytherins during my life. Great in completely different ways. But what they all had in common, is that none of them could ever be stopped by a closed door or a simple no. I don’t believe that you can be too, Mister Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Yes,-it was stupid to deny it. It had always been like this, once Draco wants something, like <em>really wants</em>, a “no” is an empty sound,- And isn't it a bad thing?</p>
<p>-It could be. Or not. Depends on what you choose to do,-Draco clenched his fists,-Every single trait a person has can be both good and bad. It can be used as a tool to create something wonderful, to help you on a journey to the happiest life, or it can absolutely destroy it. You make the difference. You draw the line,-as fascinating and inspiring the speech was, Draco’s doubts didn’t disappear. How could they? If he is the one to make the choice, to draw the line, what happens if he makes the wrong choice again? How can he trust himself now, when two years ago people had suffered, nearly died because of him? And is it really about whether it’s worth it or not to make an effort? Does Draco even deserve a second chance, a redemption of a kind? Maybe he actually is free now solely because of Potter’s efforts and if it wasn’t for him and his connections in the ministry, Draco would be where he truly belongs. In the Azkaban, where all the death eaters are, all those who hurt and tortured innocent people, those who started the war who took away so many lives.</p>
<p>“How can I just keep living and hoping for the second chance, when so many people who actually deserved it, didn’t have it because I took it away from them?”</p>
<p>-Mister Malfoy?-Draco was so deep in his thoughts that for a second he even forgot where he was. He looked up and his eyes met McGonagall’s careful glance, full of concern and a little bit of fear.</p>
<p>-I’m sorry. I think I should just go,-he started getting up, but McGonagall whispered the spell that locked the door.</p>
<p>-I don’t mean to scare you, Draco. But maybe it’s time we had a heart-to-heart, do you agree?-Draco sat back down, not responding to her question. He didn’t want that heart-to-heart. By that time he had already regretted asking anything from her. Could’ve just waited for McGonagall to analyze his marks, give him some recommendations and let him go. But then again, who else could he talk about that with?</p>
<p>-I truly don’t want you to give up on yourself, Draco. It would be such a loss,-with pouted lips, Draco was starring at his own hands,-You have been proven innocent, legally no one can use your past against you.</p>
<p>-Are you aware how that trail went down, Professor?-Draco asked. Potter’s presence was a secret, but something told him that Headmistress knew how to keep one,-Harry Potter testified for me. He convinced the minister to let me go. I haven’t been proven innocent, Potter bailed me out,-he sighed, as if admitting his weakness. Draco still wasn’t sure what he felt about Harry’s actions in court. He was obviously very relieved and grateful, he valued his freedom a lot. But at the same time, Draco now owed that said freedom to someone else, owed his whole life basically, because in his case, going to Azkaban equaled to death. And his pride absolutely hated the fact that Harry Potter had saved his life, without ever asking for anything in return.</p>
<p>-I didn’t know about that…but I assure you, even Mister Potter wouldn’t have enough power to affect minister’s decision if you were truly guilty,-she said,-If Potter really helped you, it’s great. But it doesn’t mean that you “cheated” or that you don’t deserve your freedom. You do.</p>
<p>-But…but I did horrible things! People could have died, Dumbledore died and…</p>
<p>-And you have absolutely nothing to do with it,-Draco had goosebumps as a familiar deep voice flew across the room. He looked up and saw Albus Dumbledore, not exactly in the flesh, smiling to him from his portrait,-I apologize for the interruption, Minerva,-he said. McGonagall just smiled sadly,-And you, Mister Malfoy, need to stop taking blame away from Voldemort. If there’s anyone responsible for the horrors of past couple years, it’s him. And definitely not you.</p>
<p>Draco didn’t know what to say. He got pale, but at the same time an unexpected warm feeling flooded his heart.</p>
<p>-Thank you, Albus. Now could you give us some privacy?-McGonagall asked. Dumbledore gladly nodded and disappeared from his portrait,-Now, do you believe me, Draco? -he nodded, not too confident though,- Your past doesn’t define you. You are not your mistakes,-Draco nodded again, a little more firmly,-And are you finally ready to take a look at your grades?-she smiled. Draco couldn’t help but smile back.</p>
<p>-Yes,-Draco blushed as McGonagall opened the binder and happily gasped. He knew his grades were good. Even better than good.</p>
<p>-Mister Malfoy, I will never allow you to give up on yourself with such grades!-she exclaimed,-Not a single failed exam, ever! This is great! Your grades are good enough for basically any sphere you would want to try yourself in. It’s all up to you now,-Draco’s boost of mood went back down. And it was noticeable for Minerva. Unfortunately, only a very small percent of graduates had any idea on what they were going to do in life,-If you’re not sure now, it’s fine. But I can help you a little.</p>
<p>-Okay.</p>
<p>-We will play a game that should help us narrow your opportunities down. Now, close your eyes,-Draco did as he was told. His heart immediately started beating faster,-Imagine that none of your previous actions or mistakes have any impact on your future. Imagine that all of your grates are excellent, which is almost true, imagine that all the doors are open,-Draco slightly nodded. He liked what he was seeing,-Also, you don’t have to make money. There’s no such thing as money. And not a single person in this world has any expectations on you. No peer pressure, no social statuses, nothing. Imagined?</p>
<p>-Yes.</p>
<p>-Do you like that world?</p>
<p>-Yes,-Draco sighed.</p>
<p>-What would you do in it? What would you dedicate your life to?-McGonagall asked,-It doesn’t have to be a profession. Could be a hobby, or even some abstract concept,-an answer appeared in his head almost right away. Draco just desperately didn’t want to say it out loud.</p>
<p><br/>-I’m not sure.</p>
<p><br/>-I can tell you have something on your mind, Draco. I’ve worked with children for decades now,-her voice sounded playful. Draco was still scared,-You can tell me and it will stay between us. Even if it’s too bizarre or silly,-she promised.</p>
<p><br/>-I want…I want to help more people than I’ve harmed. Make up for what I did,-he quickly mumbled with his eyes still closed. It was easier this way. For a few moment Headmistress office was absolutely silent. Minerva wanted to go back to that conversation and reassure Draco that he didn’t actually have much to make up for, but at the same time…if it truly was what he wanted…</p>
<p><br/>-Mister Malfoy, as I recall your favorite subject used to be potions?-she asked in a very casual tone. Draco finally looked at her and nodded,-What do you think about trying to become a healer?</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Harry couldn’t help but notice that Malfoy took way more time that both Hermione and Ron. For at least 40 minutes Potter walked around, starred at the door, made small talk with some other students, until he heard a loud squeak and Draco walked out of the office with an unreadable expression, putting the brochure into his bag. Unfortunately, Harry didn’t catch a single word on it, which teased his curiosity even more.</p>
<p>-What are you doing here?-Malfoy asked as Harry approached him. He looked pretty surprised to see Potter in the same hallway while he was supposed to be off with his friends.</p>
<p>-Nothing. How did it go?-Harry asked, hoping to engage him into a conversation.</p>
<p>-Were you waiting for me?-as unbelievable as that thought was, Draco couldn’t find another reason for Harry to spent at least half an hour extra in front of Headmistress office.</p>
<p>-Yeah, so how did it go? What did she say?-Harry was so desperately trying to switch the subject that Draco played along. But knowing that someone, no, not just someone, that Harry actually waited for him was...nice.</p>
<p>-Fine,-he said and they started moving towards the common room.</p>
<p>-And what did you choose?</p>
<p>-I didn’t choose anything.</p>
<p>-Wasn’t it the whole purpose of those sessions?</p>
<p>-Potter, do you expect me to have my whole future figured out after a 30 minutes talk?-Draco asked. Harry rolled his eyes.</p>
<p>-No. But you were supposed to get closer to that. And you did, I saw the brochure,-Draco’s heart skipped a beat, but he played it cool.</p>
<p>-If you saw it, why are you asking me?</p>
<p>-I couldn’t read it. I just saw that you had one,-Draco shrugged, relieved. They were already approaching the common room,-Come on, just tell me!-Harry kept asking. Draco just liked annoying him.</p>
<p>-Why? Why do you care?</p>
<p>-Pure curiosity. I told you mine!-Draco mumbled the password and both of them walked into the common room, though Harry wasn’t really noticing much around himself</p>
<p>-You actually didn’t say a word about your own profession,-Draco said, a sly smirk playing on his lips.</p>
<p>-I did tell you that I changed my mind. No one else knows that,-Harry said. Draco opened his mouth to say something and quickly closed it, looking at something behind Harry.</p>
<p>-Changed your mind on what?-Harry closed his eyes and sighed as he heard Ron’s voice. He threw one helpless look at Draco before turning to face Weasley.</p>
<p>-Oh, Ron. I didn’t notice you,-Ron had that look he always had before starting a fight. Cheeks a little red, eyes slightly narrowed down, jaws clenched.</p>
<p>-Changed your mind on what?-he repeated his question. Draco was looking for an escape plan.</p>
<p>-Ron, I…it’s not important,-Harry mumbled.</p>
<p>-Do you not want to be an auror anymore? Is it what this is about?-Ron asked.</p>
<p>-Well…yes,-Harry said, preparing for a storm.</p>
<p>-And why didn’t you tell me?</p>
<p>-I think I should go,-Draco mumbled as quietly as he could, but Ron heard him and looked at him as if just remembered that Draco was there. An even better target for his rage.</p>
<p>-Oh no, Malfoy, please don’t go!-he almost yelled,-You are the one Harry shares everything with now, you should be a part of this conversation,-Draco froze.</p>
<p>-Ron, can we all calm down and just talk about it?-Harry asked. There were still a few other students in the room and more than anything Harry wanted to just calmly and privately explain everything to Ron.</p>
<p>-I’m calm, Harry,-Ron said. He wasn’t,-I honestly don’t care that you decided not to be an auror. It’s your life, mate. I just don’t understand why you were lying to me. Why does Malfoy deserve to know and I don’t?</p>
<p>-Because of this!-Harry’s tone almost matched Ron’s,-I didn’t want to have this conversation! I knew how you’d react!</p>
<p>-So you just told him instead?-Ron looked at Malfoy like at trash.</p>
<p>-Why does it matter?</p>
<p>-Because I am your friend, not him! You’ve been acting weird since the beginning of the year! First Quidditch, now this!-Harry slightly blushed.</p>
<p>-This is stupid, Ron,-he mumbled. Draco was listening to everything and Harry really wanted this conversation to stop,-Honestly, why does it even matter?</p>
<p>-It does! And I’m just trying to understand, okay? Why such sudden change of heart?-Harry didn’t reply. Even if this question was asked in more appealing circumstances, Harry still probably wouldn’t have an answer.</p>
<p>-I don’t know what you’re talking about,-Harry said. His annoyance, anger even, grew with every second.</p>
<p>-I don’t like being lied to. And I don’t like being anyone’s second choice. Especially after Malfoy. You decided to switch sides now?,-for a second Harry just couldn’t believe what Ron just said.</p>
<p>-How can you say that?-now he truly exploded,-After everything we’ve been through together, how can you say that?! I’ve seen you at your absolute worst and stuck around! And now you’re accusing me of this just because you weren’t the first person to hear the news?!-Harry was yelling,-You are impossible sometimes, Ron! Stubborn, stupid, unbelievably closed-minded! What sides are you even talking about?-he asked with a scoff,-I’m done seeing enemies in everyone, I’m done wasting my time fighting and hating people. I’m honestly tired of this,-his tone went back now, now sounding more disappointed than angry,-But you, keep that blindfold on, life seems easier this way for you,-Harry spat out and walked into his bedroom. Ron just stood there, replaying Harry’s words in his head over and over again, but still not realizing them completely.</p>
<p>Draco too felt as if the ground vanished from under his feet. He had seen Harry in rage before, but that was something absolutely different. Before Weasley could wake up, Draco sneaked into the dorm too. Harry was either pretending, or already asleep. Either way Draco had nothing to say to him. He knew he was an indirect reason why Harry and Ron just had that fight. And he knew that what Harry did was basically taking Draco’s side, which already felt weird enough. He didn’t want to be in a center of another conflict, or a reason of two best friends’ break up. But it was Harry’s choice. To defend him again, to be by his side, to stand up for him. Draco laid down sleepless, absolutely amazed by that thought.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey, guys.<br/>Life had been pretty crazy lately and i couldn't find time to update.<br/>Anyway. Hope you're doing well, considering everything.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Almost 6 hours of dreamless sleep didn’t help Harry’s anger wear off. He woke up feeling just as annoyed as the previous night and got off the bed only after the dorm deserted. </p>
<p>	Making his way to the Great Hall, Harry tried his best to avoid all morning people eager to have the most meaningless small talk with him, but the person he really didn’t want to run into was Ron. Weasley though, as if nothing happened, was talking to some younger Gryffindors over the breakfast, sitting on his usual place. Harry’s seat was empty, yet it didn’t look very welcoming. Potter froze in the very entrance of the Great Hall, looked over his table and if it wasn’t for his empty stomach making resisting sound, he would have turned around and went back to bed for his well-deserved extra 20 minutes of sleep.</p>
<p> Harry looked at Ron. Not hiding it, not even trying to make it subtle. Watched him laugh and smile, and frustrations grew inside of him. It was like a tradition of its kind, every year something just HAD TO happen to drive the trio apart. Any little thing could grow into a huge drama that would last for weeks. Weeks of complete avoidance, of angry glances, of heartache.</p>
<p>	And Harry saw nothing but a waste of time in this. But at the same time, he was too convinced in his own rightness to go up to Weasley and talk. Instead he just looked at him for a couple seconds, feeling even angrier and sadder than after waking up and noticed Hermione. She sat next to Ron, but didn’t share his positive mood. She nodded at Harry, as if acknowledging his presence and saying “Hey! I’m still here!”. But her eyes were sad and she didn’t rush to invite Harry to sit with them.</p>
<p>	Harry sighed and looked at the very end of the table. It was a lot quieter and roomier there. Social hierarchy worked even on the dining tables and everyone who considered themselves someone, or wanted to be seen with someone, did their best to occupy the seat out in the front. People who either didn’t care or had no choice sat in the back.</p>
<p>Harry wasn’t really surprised to see Draco there, sitting alone with a letter in his hands. Not that Potter considered him a loser, he seemed more like a “people who don’t care” category. Or maybe Malfoy created his own category. “People who want to be left alone” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Hey,-Harry landed right next to him, ignoring a bunch of available seats around them. Before Draco could react, he started filling his plate with food, as if claiming the seat his own.</p>
<p>-Morning…,-Draco was more surprised than annoyed. He put down the letter and Harry got a glimpse of beautiful careful handwriting,-What are you doing?</p>
<p>-Interesting question, Malfoy,-Harry responded, quickly devouring everything in the close proximity to him. He wanted to eat and run off as quickly as he could.</p>
<p>-I mean here. Are you still not talking to Weasley?-Draco seemed genuinely surprised by that thought. In his mind, a conflict like that would be resolved in a minute, especially between two best friends.</p>
<p>-Is there a Quidditch training today?-Harry asked, ignoring Draco’s question completely. Malfoy didn’t pressure him and nodded at his question,-And when’s the game?</p>
<p>-In a little less than two weeks,-Draco said, looking into the direction Potter was starring at. Harry may have been talking to Draco, but his eyes didn’t come off Ron.</p>
<p>-Catch the snitch,-Potter said</p>
<p>-What? Why?</p>
<p>-Because then it will be your win. Not his,-he nodded at unbothered laughing Ron. Harry rolled his eyes, got up and disappeared outside the Great Hall.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Next time Draco saw Potter that day was on his way to the class. The second class of the day, actually, because Mister Potter, for a reason known only to him, had decided not to honor the mortals with his presence on the Potions. Draco could hear Snape’s voice saying those words, added to many other taunts and sadly smiled to himself.</p>
<p>	Malfoy marched to another wing of the castle looking around himself. Slowly but firmly the school started falling into the madness familiar to everyone who had studied here during the Triwizard Tournament. The preparations for the Ball. Students were hysterically looking for partners, deciding on the outfits, dedicating most of their days to that one night that was still months away. Draco wasn’t even going to go. The only person he could’ve invited even just as a friend had better things to do than go back to Hogwarts that year and Draco respected her decision. He thought that maybe he’d chime in for a second if he gets too bored, but mostly, the ball didn’t attract him at all. </p>
<p>	Harry, too, seemed to have better things to worry about than a ball partner. Now that he had officially broken up with Ginny and didn’t “have to” invite anyone, the Ball stopped feeling like an obligation. He just hoped Hermione turns out to be wrong and no one would actually force him to go. Which was...pretty unrealistic. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Once Harry stepped into the class – 5 minutes late, but it’s the History of Magic, so who cares – he was facing the exact same problem as earlier this morning. Normally, he sat right behind Ron and Hermione during the classes. This way they were still technically sitting together, and also Hermione with her hair and Ron with his abnormal height could hide sleeping Harry from the professor.</p>
<p>	His seat was still available. The word about their fight hadn’t gone out yet, so no one would even think about sitting there. But neither did Harry. Instead, he took his seat in the back of the class. Next to Malfoy. Again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-What are we doing?-he asked Draco as if his behavior was absolutely normal. Confused Malfoy silently pointed at the chapter they were reading, earning a nod from Potter. They hadn’t talked till the end of the lesson, but it all just felt so…casual? Casual, but weird. How Harry just sat down next to him as if he had every right to, as if it was just something that they did. How their arms touched every time each of them had to write something down. How Harry accidentally touched Draco’s knee with his and then whispered a quiet “sorry” without even looking up. How he just casually used Draco’s textbook because he didn’t bring his own. </p>
<p>Draco knew himself enough to admit, it was nice. Really nice. But at the same time he was playing a role of a replacement here and was aware of it. Maybe Harry hoped Ron would notice them and get jealous. Maybe Potter just couldn’t stand being alone, even for one class. Either way, he didn’t sit next to Draco because he actually wanted to sit with him. And once Malfoy’s illusions bumped into that thought and fell apart, Draco felt a familiar wave of self-hatred coming up to him. </p>
<p>	The classes ended unusually, for the history of magic, quickly. 8th year’s Quidditch team headed to the field for another training, and so did Harry, following his newly obtained habit. That day he sat down farther away from the field. He couldn’t hear the players talk anymore before and it made him feel more like an outcast. It was the first time Harry watched the training and actually missed being the one on the broomstick. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I didn’t see you at the Potions today,-Hermione sat down next to Harry. He smiled to her as seven figures flew into the sky.</p>
<p>-I really wanted to sleep,-he confessed,-What are you doing here?-Quidditch wasn’t one of Hermione’s interests, and even being an amazing girlfriend of the captain she is, she rarely visited the trainings</p>
<p>-I don’t know when I’ll get another chance to talk to you properly,-she said, tone full of sarcasm.</p>
<p>-He already told you everything, didn’t he?-Hermione nodded,-And? What do you think?</p>
<p>-I think you are both idiots. And I’m definitely not taking anyone’s side here.</p>
<p>-But he was wrong!-Harry said so loudly that even Sue Li, the team’s new Beater looked at him,-He was!-Harry repeated, lowering his voice.</p>
<p>-You did lie to him. And chose to tell everything to Malfoy. I mean…Malfoy!</p>
<p>-This honestly has nothing to do with Malfoy,-Harry said, a little more annoyed than he implied,-You should have heard Ron yesterday. Why does he even hate Draco so much?-Harry mumbled, mostly to himself.</p>
<p>-Because of Fred, probably,-Hermione said. And Harry felt a sharp prick of conscience.</p>
<p>-He didn’t kill Fred,-Harry said.</p>
<p>-No, he didn’t. But he was one of the Eaters,-Hermione shrugged. And though Harry still thought that it was unfair to blame Draco for what he hadn’t done, he now felt more indulgent towards Ron.<br/>But seriously, why didn’t you tell us you didn’t want to be an auror anymore?-Hermione asked after a pause.</p>
<p>-I knew how he’d react. He was so excited about it, I just…I guess I didn’t want to disappoint him,-Harry sighed, looking up. Ron caught a quaffle and threw it back at the chaser, Terry Boot. </p>
<p>-And what about me?-Hermione asked,-You could have told me then,-Harry stuttered. He could have. But he didn’t. Why?-I am still your friend, you know? Not just Ron’s girlfriend,-she said and there was too much pain and unspoken resentment in her voice. </p>
<p>-Of course you are! I just…,-he sighed. Granger just nodded.</p>
<p>-I just feel like you are getting distant from us. And I don’t like it,-she said.</p>
<p>-Distant? Me? No offence, but I’m sure that if I was suddenly to disappear, it would take you and Ron at least a couple of days to even notice that,-Harry’s mouth once again outran his brain. Hermione starred at him in shock. She wanted to say something, but before she could, a loud thud was heard down from the field. Harry immediately got to his feet and looked down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Draco was on the ground, his broomstick laying next to him. Team’s beater and Draco’s personal bully Michael Harris was standing upon him yelling something. Draco just starred up at him, visibly doing his absolute best not to respond. No one on the field was doing anything to stop Harris. Only after he pulled out his wand and pointed it at Malfoy, Ron got worried</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Expelliarmus!-Harry yelled as he and Hermione ran down to the field. The wand jumped out of Michael’s hands,-What the hell is going on?-Draco quickly got up, fixing his uniform. His hair was messed up and his clothes were dirty, yet somehow managed to keep more dignity than anyone present.</p>
<p>-None of your business,-Ron chimed in. Harry really hoped he wouldn’t.</p>
<p>-Really? That’s normal for you? Players attacking each other, especially when one of them is down?</p>
<p>-What are you even doing here?-Ron asked. Hermione approached him, trying to calm him down, but that rarely worked out,-Came to look after your new best friend?-heat touched his cheeks, but Harry ignored it. </p>
<p>-Just trying to see how hopeless you are,-he said,-I guess I’ve seen enough,-Harry felt a strong desire to grab Draco’s hand and drag him away from this field. From Ron, who obviously blames him for their fight, from all the other teammates who use him as a puppet to let their anger out on. Just take him away and protect him from all this mess. Instead he just looked at him with a silent “are you okay?” in his eyes. Draco seemed to have gotten it and gave him a slight nod. One of the last trainings before the match was over.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Heeey!<br/>Hope you enjoyed the new chapter!<br/>It would mean a lot if you left kudos and comments, feedback is very appreciated</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The excitement of the first Quidditch game of the season brought its fair share of stress and nerves too. Mostly to Ron Weasley. And with nerves, the realization of how much he needed Harry’s support came too. It was his first game as the captain, he had no right to mess this up. He had to win, to establish himself as a good captain, to make the team believe in themselves, to prove himself capable of doing this. Ron looked at his team, a group full of talented people who would rather die than miss an opportunity to start a fight with each other and just hoped that they would take that passion and bring it to the field. </p>
<p>	When the match was a couple days away, Ron almost lost sleep. Having gone through the war, you’d think it would take more than a school sports game to scare him. But it was a pleasant kind of fear. It felt so weirdly normal to be afraid of losing a Quidditch cup again, not starving to death in the middle of nowhere.</p>
<p>	Harry meanwhile, was very glad it was Ron wearing captain’s mantle, not him. Knowing the stress and the pressure that captaincy brought firsthand, Harry didn’t really miss it. And he did wish he could be there for Ron, comfort and support him. But as soon as Harry finally decided to act on these feelings and make amends with Weasley, he’d inevitably do something to make him change his mind. And that circle didn’t seem to have an ending yet. </p>
<p>	Harry’s days as an ex-war hero, now a simple Hogwarts student mostly looked exactly like previous ones. Harry would wake up a little later than he probably should, have a quick breakfast with Malfoy at the end of the table and run to the classes. With Malfoy. Again.</p>
<p>	Not that he didn’t have other friends. And not that Hermione stopped being his friend. And definitely not that Draco now suddenly became his friend. They just…matched. In their own very weird and unique way. They had mountains of issues and unspoken feelings to go over, but instead they talked about simple things; about Quidditch, about classes and homework, about that Ball neither of them was excited about. Avoidance of all important topics was probably the only thing that was holding Harry and Draco back from becoming real friends. But even that progress was excellent, compared to what they were to each other just a year ago.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	The date of the first Quidditch match came way quicker than anyone could expect. The players and the fans couldn’t talk about anything else; no one could hold back their excitement. Hufflepuff vs. the 8th year, Ron Weasley vs. Dora Williams, their captain. Ron was sitting at the breakfast, pale as the tablecloth. Hermione comforted him as much as she could, but at times like this, only victory could calm Ron down. </p>
<p>	Harry watched him from his seat, surprisingly all alone. Draco, who always found a way to show up in the Great Hall before Potter did, was now very, very late. Harry looked at the clock every 3 minutes and waited for Draco upon his now empty plate, and when by the end of the breakfast Malfoy still hadn’t showed up, Harry had no choice but to leave without him. Until…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Oh, God,-Draco entered the Great Hall, hiding his face. His hair, now longer than ever, was combed in a way to cover the left part of his face, Draco was looking down and didn’t notice Harry who basically ran into him.</p>
<p>-Potter!-in surprise Draco raised his head and revealed what Harry thought he saw a few seconds ago.</p>
<p>-What happened to your face?-Harry asked, resisting a strong urge to touch his cheek. Especially, the dark purplish-green spot right under his eye.</p>
<p>-Nothing,-Draco fixed his hair and tried to walk past him, but Harry grabbed his elbow and dragged him away from the curious eyes of their schoolmates,-What the hell are you doing?-Draco pushed him away.</p>
<p>-Who did this? Who?-Harry asked with all his rage and Draco wanted to laugh</p>
<p>-No one, relax,-he made another attempt to set himself free and failed once again.</p>
<p>-So you gave yourself a bruise?</p>
<p>-You could say that. Can I go?</p>
<p>-No!-Potter changed his tone to more comforting one, as he thought,-Does it hurt? </p>
<p>-No, it doesn’t hurt, let go off me!-Harry just noticed he was still holding his arm. And didn’t let go,-Potter, piss of, I’m not in a mood!</p>
<p>-Then tell me what happened!</p>
<p>-Nothing!</p>
<p>-Liar!-now Draco was actually mad. And it even surprised Harry, because he had seen Malfoy in rage. Mostly after or during their fights. But never when he was shown concern. Not that Harry had ever shown him any concern.</p>
<p>-Leave me alone and find another charity case, okay?-before the meaning of his words could reach Harry, Malfoy knocked his shoulder with his and walked by. He grabbed an apple from the table and quickly rushed to the class. In a couple seconds, Harry went there too. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Malfoy neglected their usual spot. He sat a little closer to the teacher, next to an ex-Hufflepuff student, probably assuming she’d be too nice to kick him out or start asking questions. Harry spent the whole lesson sitting all alone and starring into Draco’s back, not honoring the new DADA Professor with even a small share of his attention. In his head, he scrolled through the list of potential suspects who could have wanted to hurt Malfoy and it was painfully long. Michael Harris and his friends weren’t the only ones wishing ill to Draco. Half of the school had lost either a friend or a family member during the war, and though all of them knew perfectly well that he was acquitted of all charges, it didn’t mean anything to them. Once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater. </p>
<p>	Harry reached the common room faster than Draco did. The match was two hours away, the crowd started slowly gathering on the field as Hufflepuffs had their one last training. Tense atmosphere took over Hogwarts. Tense, but exciting.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Are you ready to talk now?-Harry asked the second Draco crossed the boys dorm.</p>
<p>-Dear Merlin!-he jumped and touched his chest in a scare. Potter couldn’t help but smile</p>
<p>-Did you go to Ms. Pomfrey’s at least? She should be able to heal bruises,-Harry said, sitting on one of the beds.</p>
<p>-I did,-Draco closed the door and opened his closet, taking out his Quidditch uniform,-It’s not just a bruise and she said it would disappear in a few hours. Or days.</p>
<p>-Not just a bruise?-a small light-bulb came on in Harry’s head,-Wait…boxing telescope? Is that what happened to your eye?-he smiled as memories flooded his head. The first time he had seen that thing was a few years ago and it was Hermione who was doomed to walk around with a black eye. Boxing telescope was one of Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes’ biggest hits. A perfect prank, as Weasleys called it.</p>
<p>-You mean that piece of trash Weasley is making? Yes, that’s what happened,-Draco rolled his eyes, which hurt unexpectedly badly.</p>
<p>-Well, you are lucky then,-Harry said as he got up and started digging his way through his still unorganized luggage.</p>
<p>-Oh yes, very. Very lucky! Purple really fits me!</p>
<p>-No, you are lucky because I am still friends with George Weasley,-Harry said pulling out a very old, but still functionate Bruise removal paste,-Nothing else will help and the bruise won’t fade away by itself,-Harry opened up the tube and squeezed some of the paste on his hand,-May I?,-Draco shrugged and sat down on the bed. Harry stepped closer to him and started gently and slowly applying the paste on Draco’s bruise.</p>
<p>-It smells horrible,-Draco said, closing his eyes</p>
<p>-Maybe it’s just your hair,-Draco opened his eyes in shock and Harry chuckled.</p>
<p>-Not funny, Potter</p>
<p>-Sure,-he kept applying the paste, taking his time and feeling Draco’s pale, almost transparent skin under his very fingertips. Just a thought that Draco allowed it mesmerized him,-So someone slipped you a Boxing Telescope. Who?</p>
<p>-No idea. One of ours</p>
<p>-Harris?</p>
<p>-Could be him,-Draco said and indifference in his tone pissed Harry off. But it also upset him.</p>
<p>-I have to say this,-he said. He was halfway done with the paste,-It’s so weird seeing you like this.</p>
<p>-With a bruise?-Draco asked opening his eyes</p>
<p>-No, close your eyes!-he commanded, Draco complied,-Not with a bruise…So…broken? Defeated, in a way,-Harry expected a punch coming after his words, but Draco didn’t touch him. He didn’t even say anything for a while</p>
<p>-Shut up,-he said.</p>
<p>-No, I mean…isn’t fighting back your entire personality? A couple years ago you wouldn’t sleep until you found who did this to you. And then you’d get them expelled. And definitely threaten to get the school closed,-Harry smiled, hoping to make Draco laugh too, but he remained painfully serious. Harry knew they were crossing the line of their first serious conversation, and though Potter both realized it had to be done, and even wanted to do it, it was still scary. It reminded Harry of interacting with a wild animal. One not careful word, one sudden move and you lost him.</p>
<p>-My father would have done all of that,-Draco whispered after a pause. Harry’s hand froze. He had two options now; either back up, or go further and try to finally get Draco to open up.</p>
<p>-Do you miss him?-Harry asked probably the stupidest question in his head, but he didn’t know any other way to get Draco to keep talking about his father. He finished fixing up his eye, hid the tube in his pocket and sat down to the opposite bed.</p>
<p>-Believe it or not, I do,-Draco sighed. He opened his eyes, but chose to look at the floor. It’s always easier to tell the truth if you’re not looking your opponent in the eyes,-Even though he’s an “evil man who pulled him into his war”,-Harry recognized his own words right away.</p>
<p>-I said it just so the ministry would let you go,-Harry said, not sure why he was looking for excuses for the truth</p>
<p>-But you meant it. And you didn’t really lie,-Draco said. And Harry thought that his relationship with his father could have been way more complex than he ever thought.</p>
<p>-He’s still your father. Mine was a bully when he was a little younger than us,-Harry realized it was a shitty example just after he said it. And made sure of it after Draco scoffed sadly.</p>
<p>-But he is a hero who would have done anything for his family. For his son. Mine wouldn’t,-it felt like Draco’s words were supposed to be drenched in sarcasm, but they weren’t. At all,-Forget it. I don’t know why I just told all of this. Thanks for the eye,-Draco started getting up, but Harry made a risky move and grabbed his hand.</p>
<p>-I don’t mind. Really. You can tell me what you want,-he said. Draco starred down at him, eyes red and a huge purple spot that only started fading away.</p>
<p>-Why?-he asked.</p>
<p>-That’s what friends do,-another risky move, even worse than the first one. Harry also let go of his hand, because now he was almost sure Malfoy wouldn’t run away.</p>
<p>-You want to be my friend? You?</p>
<p>-I thought we were almost there,-he shrugged</p>
<p>-This is not friendship. I owe you,-Draco said.</p>
<p>-For what?</p>
<p>-Azkaban. You saved me. I owe you now.</p>
<p>-No. You didn’t ask me for anything. And it doesn’t really matter, even if I wasn’t there, they still would have let you go,-Harry said, really believing his words</p>
<p>-They wouldn’t have. I told them the same things you did, but no one cared. Ministry just couldn’t say no to you,-Draco had a point and Harry hated it.</p>
<p>-Either way…it doesn’t matter now! You’re free, you can just forget about it all,-Harry said, getting up.</p>
<p>-How I wish it were true,-Draco said under his breath</p>
<p>-What do you mean?</p>
<p>-Don’t you understand? I’m not actually free and probably will never be. I’ll always be one fight away from an Azkaban cell,-Draco got up too,-One conflict, one complain about me, and all your efforts will be a waste! That’s why I can’t fight back! That’s why I let Harris and his idiots do whatever they want to me! That’s why I want to leave this damn place more than anything!-by the time Draco finished, he already regretting saying so much. And Harry was starring at him in shock. He never even thought of it all this way.</p>
<p>-I had no idea...</p>
<p>-Forget it, really,-Draco grabbed his uniform and stormed out of the room. The match was getting closer with every minute.</p>
<p>-Wait! Malfoy!-Harry followed him. Thankfully the common room was empty too,-Draco!</p>
<p>-What?-it was probably his first name that made Malfoy stop and turn around.</p>
<p>-I just…I wanted to say I’m sorry and…you really don’t owe me anything, I mean it,-Harry was mumbling. He took a deep breath to get his thoughts in order and looked Draco straight into his eyes,-I have no idea where you get that patience from, I would have already fought half of the school if I was you,-Harry said,-And…if you can’t stand up for yourself, I’ll do that,-that promise came out awkward, not half as strong as Harry implied. But he meant it, every word.</p>
<p>-I already told you, I don’t want to be your charity case,-Draco said through his teeth.</p>
<p>-I don’t even know what that means,-Harry started approaching him. A slight smile started blooming on his face,-But I want to be your friend. And I can’t stand seeing my friends being treated like that.</p>
<p>-Why would you want that?-Draco said through a sigh. He didn’t believe him and Harry didn’t know how to change his mind.</p>
<p>-What kind of question is that, Malfoy?-he smiled, now being just a couple steps away from him,-I mean, Draco. Friends don’t use last names.</p>
<p>-I’m not calling you Harry,-Draco said after a pause. He wasn’t yet smiling, but the sad and suspicious shade started disappearing from his eyes.</p>
<p>-We’ll see,-before Draco could resist, Harry looked at his watch,-We better go to the field if you don’t want Ron to kill you. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Harry and Draco ran to the Quidditch field, and while Potter was a couple steps ahead and couldn’t see Draco’s face, he smiled. And wasn’t as assured in Hufflepuff’s victory as he was an hour ago.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So here's another part.<br/>Hope you're enjoying this silly little fic. I'll try to post more often from now on.<br/>Please let me know what you thought!<br/>Thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry was slowly losing the last drops of his patience as he waited outside the boys changing room for Malfoy, who had been in there for at least 15 minutes now. Harry couldn’t imagine a scenario where it would take him 15 minutes to put on his Quidditch uniform.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-If you don’t come out now, they will have to delay the match!-Harry yelled through the closed door and smiled at people who looked back at him,-Draco!</p>
<p>-Piss off, Potter, I’m coming!-Malfoy opened the door, almost hitting Harry with it. In Potter’s humble opinion, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the way Draco looked, but Malfoy didn’t agree,-This uniform looks ridiculous,-he complained and, to be honest, had his reasons.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Choosing uniform was a whole issue for the team. The players obviously had to look different from the others and their old uniforms didn’t serve that purpose anymore. Ron did his best to arrange a proper meeting and discuss what kind of uniform everyone wanted. Most of them just shrugged and said “whatever you want”. Draco didn’t even show up on the meeting. One of the few girls on the team offered to make a compromise and combine all 4 main colors of Hogwarts houses in the design, using black as the base. Ron didn’t come up with anything better. He tried to please everyone, and in the end, they all hated the result.</p>
<p>  The same thing happened with the name of the team. At first people say they don’t care, then they try to put all the responsibility to the captain’s shoulder, and in the end complain that he didn’t do a good job. But here Ron decided to be careful and left a simple “8th year” as the name of the team. The disappointed look on Professor Hooch’s face stayed with him for a while.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I look like a peacock,-Draco mumbled, looking at his own clothes with disgust. The brightness of yellow and blue pissed him off, and wearing a Gryffindor house color was almost insulting.</p>
<p>-It’s basically all black,-Harry said</p>
<p>-All black?-Draco asked, confused and partly insulted,-Are you blind even with glasses on?</p>
<p>-Okay, you’re grumpy when you’re nervous, noted,-Harry said and Draco gave him a dead stare.</p>
<p>-I’m not nervous!-he said and proceeded to mock Harry until Professor Hooch asked both teams to get on the field. And then Harry saw that Draco was, in fact, nervous.</p>
<p>-You got this,-he said, putting a hand on his shoulder,-Break a leg.</p>
<p>-What did you just say to me?</p>
<p>-It’s…It’s a muggle expression,-Harry rushed to explain himself,-Means “Good luck”,-Harry smiled weakly, but Draco just shook his head in shock.</p>
<p>-How sweet,-he took a deep breath and headed to the middle of the field where the rest of his teammates were already gathering. Harry watched him leave with a smile on his lips, until his eyes stumbled on Hermione kissing Ron for good luck. Weasley looked very pale and visibly nervous. Harry wanted to run up to him, but didn’t move. After a minute Hermione approached him and together, they got up to the tribunes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  The match promised to be at least not boring and Harry made sure of that when he saw that day’s commentator. Luna Lovegood, without the usual lion’s head hat, but in not any less interesting outfit took her place next to the microphone. Horace Slughorn was sitting next to her, ready to take over once Luna starts to drift away, which will inevitably happen. </p>
<p>  She was wearing a dress that reminded of the 8th year’s team's new uniform, but was multiple times brighter. The tips of her hair were blue, her make-up was equally beautiful and crazy. It was obvious which team she was rooting for and Harry smiled every time he looked at her. She seemed like the only person whom war didn’t change that much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-So…how’s Ron? Nervous?-Harry asked Hermione once they reached their seats.</p>
<p>-Nervous doesn’t even begin to cover it,-she said. The game hadn’t started yet but it was minutes away,-And how’s Malfoy?-there was only a drop of bitterness in her voice, but even that didn’t go unnoticed.</p>
<p>-Fine,-Harry said. Hermione nodded and looked into the field. Harry hated how forced their conversation was,-Someone slipped him a Boxing Telescope,-he said, just to say something.</p>
<p>-Really? Do you know who?</p>
<p>-No. Neither does…Malfoy,-Harry made a half second pause before “Malfoy” as his first name almost slipped out of his mouth.</p>
<p>-Well, it wasn’t Ron, if that’s what you’re asking,-Hermione said,-Or me.</p>
<p>-No, I didn’t even think of that!-Harry sighed. Hermione still didn’t even look at him,-Hermione.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-I’m sorry, okay? That we fought, I really want to make up with Ron, it’s just…</p>
<p>-Just stop lying to him. He already forgave you, just don’t let it happen again,-Hermione said. And Harry wished he could say that there were no lies between them anymore, that their fight could be forgotten and they could trust each other again. But…,-What?</p>
<p>-There’s one thing…</p>
<p>-Of course,-she sighed. Professor Hooch blew a whistle, very soon this field will be way too loud for casual conversations.</p>
<p>-It’s not exactly a secret,-Harry started, trying to speed up,-I mean, it’s not only my secret. That’s why I couldn’t tell anyone.</p>
<p>-Even us? Really?</p>
<p>-No, of course I should have told you…And I will tell Ron, just…let me do it myself, okay?</p>
<p>-Fine. What is it?</p>
<p>-During the summer I…it was me who…,-Harry kept stopping and stuttering, still not completely positive if he even had a right to reveal what he was about to say.</p>
<p>-Testified for Malfoy in court?-Hermione expressed his thoughts and smirked seeing shock on Harry’s face.</p>
<p>-How did you know?</p>
<p>-It’s pretty obvious when you think about it,-she said, flipping her hair to her shoulder,-I noticed you started showing interest towards Malfoy and wondered why. And then I thought, who in the world has enough power to convince Ministry to let an ex-Death Eater go? Who Ministry owes so much to? The answer was obvious. You are the only one who had both motive and resources,-Harry stared at her in shock. Everyone knew Granger was smart, but when she pulled off something close to actual mind-reading, it was scary.</p>
<p>-Wow…,-Hermione chuckled,-And you’re not mad?</p>
<p>-Why would I be mad? You saved someone, isn’t it just something that you do?-she smiled. Harry did too. He immediately felt lighter.</p>
<p>-I think we’re kind of friends now,-he said, finally feeling like he could say it.</p>
<p>-You and Malfoy?-he nodded,-I see.</p>
<p>-You’re not mad?-Harry asked again and Hermione smiled.</p>
<p>-Harry, you are an adult with your own life. You can be with whoever you want,-she said.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-I mean, be friends…with whoever you want...to be friends with ,-Hermione mumbled and awkwardly looked away as the match finally started. Harry decided to ignore what she said. Both of them tried to pay attention to the game, but really could only look at two figures up in the sky. The tribunes started cheering, supporting the teams and Harry was sad to notice that Hufflepuff got way more support this time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Welcome to the first match of the season! And first match ever for 8th year team! Let’s see how they’ll get along today,-Luna started, absolutely ignoring all four balls that already flew in different directions,-I would like to mention the uniform of the team of the 8th year first,-Slughorn already looked pretty concerned, but didn’t dare to take a mic away from Luna yet,-In fact, I helped Ron design it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Even from the tribunes Harry could see Ron blushing. He chuckled at his friend, but his happiness didn’t last as Kadi Bush scored first 10 points for Hufflepuff within the first 5 minutes of the match.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Not a great start,-Hermione mumbled. Her voice faded away in the happy screams of Hufflepuff fans.</p>
<p>-It’s just 10 points,-Harry said, but started getting nervous too. Slughorn took the mic away from Luna, who kept talking about the uniform of the players, and announced the score.<br/>10 points turned into 20, and then into 30. Terrence Glover, Hufflepuff’s Keeper seemed to have been on fire and knew it. He caught Quaffles with surprising ease, smiled a lot, flew towards the crowd and even “flirted” with it. It pissed Harry off. He saw how with every missed Quaffle Ron’s confidence shrunk, and it was the worst thing that could have happened to them. Ron, losing his spirit.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Wow!-together with the whole school Luna exclaimed,-Malfoy almost got hit off his broom! Seems like Beaters don’t like him very much,-Draco managed to stay afloat, but Luna was right. Michael Harris, the beater closest to Draco did the bare minimum to save him from bludger’s hit.</p>
<p>-Gryffindor-I mean, 8th year scores!-Slughorn yelled into the mic, gently pushing Lovegood away,- 40:10, Hufflepuff winning,-first 10 points gave some sense of relief, but not much. And definitely not enough.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  The game had already been on for almost an hour. The score, that changed for the last time about 20 minutes ago, now was 50 : 20. All players were tired, Ron looked beaten down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Aren’t Hufflepuffs supposed to be the weakest team?-Hermione asked Harry. She had never been this worried about a Quidditch game before. Maybe only when Harry was attacked during one.</p>
<p>-It…it changes from time to time, really,-Harry said,-But never say that in front of Ron.</p>
<p>-I’m not an idiot,-she said,-What if they just end the game now?-Terry Boot, the chaser of the 8th year was so annoyingly close to scoring, but still failed that Ron’s groan was heard on the entire pitch,-And what the hell is Malfoy doing?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Draco really was weirdly unenergetic during the first hour of the game. Harry always kept an eye on him, and sometimes he wanted to yell : “WHY THE HELL ARE YOU JUST HANGING THERE?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I think he’s being nice,-Harry said the idea that suddenly struck him.</p>
<p>-What? To Hufflepuffs?-the thought of Malfoy “being nice” was unnatural itself, but towards Hufflepuff, their rivals? Impossible.</p>
<p>-No, to Ron. I think he’s giving him a chance to decrease the margin first. Then he’ll catch the snitch.</p>
<p>-That’s…not very like him,-Harry knew it was just Hermione’s way to say “You are insanely wrong”, but still, something made him think he wasn’t. The way Draco constantly looked at Ron, the way he stopped himself from flying after the snitch, and misdirected Dora Williams, Hufflepuff’s seeker, instead. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>  After two hours players were basically falling down from the broomsticks. The audience, too, lost a fair share of its enthusiasm and now just wanted the game to be over. But the score was 80 : 40, and Ron was very, very unsatisfied by that.</p>
<p>  Harry and Hermione watched Slughorn and Luna from time to time. Slytherin’s new Head of The House looked at the clock and at the score table. His intentions were clear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Malfoy needs to catch the snitch or it’s over,-Hermione said. She still didn’t believe in Harry’s theory,-God, Ron is going to be destroyed.</p>
<p>-He’ll catch it,-Harry said,-He’ll catch it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Potter starred right at Malfoy. He saw him in action and knew that technically, Draco could win. But so much could still go wrong.</p>
<p>  The snitch gleamed near Hufflepuff’s goal hoops and Malfoy noticed it. Draco was way closer to the snitch than Dora, but he didn’t rush to it using his full speed, instead he started moving pretty carefully, not gaining much attention from Hufflepuff’s captain. He was halfway across the pitch when she, fast as the lightning bold flew to get the snitch first.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-She has a better broom!-Harry exclaimed,-Hers is faster, it’s not fair! Luna!-Harry even got on his feet and started calling for the commentators,-Luna! Professor!</p>
<p>-Harry, sit down!-Hermione pulled him down by his robes,-It’s too late now!</p>
<p>-It’s not fair!-he repeated.</p>
<p>-Harry, what’s wrong?-Luna asked through her microphone and the whole school heard her.</p>
<p>-Ms. Lovegood, the game, please!-Slughorn did his best to help her focus,-Malfoy and Williams are both chasing the snitch.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>All Draco’s advantage disappeared; Dora reached him surprisingly quickly. Now they flew shoulder to shoulder. Williams had her arm stretched out to grab the snitch as soon as she gets a chance to. Draco tried to overtake her, but his broom really was a lot older and slower.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-THE BROOMS ARE DIFFERENT!-Harry kept complaining, gaining weird stares from everyone around him.</p>
<p>-HARRY, SHUT UP!-Hermione kicked him and he looked at her, not noticing a sharp angle in snitch’s trajectory. Suddenly it flew towards the ground. Dora wasn’t ready for such move and inertia carried her away onward, while Draco noticed it and made a move that made the whole crowd gasp.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  In professional Quidditch it’s called Starfish and Stick, originally for Keepers, but can be used by Seekers too. This move involves a player, basically jumping off his broom, but holding himself with one hand, while another catches the snitch.</p>
<p>  And that was exactly what Draco did.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-He did it! He did it!-the tribunes exploded. Some with delight, some with shock, but no one remained indifferent to the ending of the first Quidditch match of the season. </p>
<p>-Congratulations to the team of 8th year and especially to their Seeker, Draco Malfoy!-Luna announced. Draco was already on the ground and his teammates started landing too.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Harry and Hermione ran towards the pitch. They were both out of breath from all the screaming, but the feeling of complete rapture took over them both. Hermione immediately jumped into Ron’s arms. She kissed him and he kept laughing and smiling, holding her in his arms. Harry watched them with one eye as he finally found Malfoy in the crowd that filled the Quidditch pitch. He pulled him towards himself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-It was amazing!-Harry yelled at Draco, trying to make sure he could hear him through all the noise. Draco was in shock, but in a good one. And when Harry grabbed him by the shoulders and then pulled him into a hug, he didn’t object,-I knew you’d do it!</p>
<p>-Thanks, Potter,-Draco was hugging him back and Harry felt dizzy. The whole thing actually felt a little surreal. Not that he ever tried anything like this, but he was pretty sure that’s what getting high feels like.</p>
<p>-You were amazing, really,-he repeated, now looking into Draco’s face. His hands were still on his shoulders, and Draco was looking at him with such happy and open smile, he had never seen Malfoy like that before. His hair was absolutely wild, Draco would probably have a heart attack if he had a mirror close, his cheeks were bright red and he was still out of breath. They both were. From seeing Malfoy like that, something pinched in Harry’s heart. He didn’t really know what he was doing when he leaned his face towards Draco.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-MALFOY!-strong arms of Terry Boot and Megan Jones pulled him away from Harry before the irreversible could happen. They congratulated and praised him, so did they whole class. Ron, too, didn’t seem to be upset that Draco was the one who brought them victory.</p>
<p>  Harry stood a little aside, watched Draco and smiled. He felt…weirder now. What could have happened, what he almost did, it scared him. But at the same time…he sort of was upset they were interrupted.</p>
<p>  While Potter was trying to free his mind from those weird thoughts, Ron approached him. He was smiling ear to ear and definitely wasn’t mad at Harry anymore. Neither was Harry.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Congratulations, Ron,-he said, stretching out his hand for a handshake. Ron looked at it and pulled him into a hug. Harry chuckled and felt like his heart could have exploded from the happiness he felt that day. </p>
<p>  Someone, probably Dean Thomas, offered to dedicate the rest of the day to celebrating the victory. No one complained. Team members walked to the common room as if they owned the castle. And Draco was getting so much positive attention, that he started doubting the realness of what was happening. Even Ginny Weasley gave him a pat on the shoulder and a “Not bad, Malfoy” as she walked by. Many others did too. Draco will never admit how much it meant to him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Okay, where did that come from?-Hermione asked, pointing at the table. The whole 8th year class gathered in their common room, accompanied by a few friends; Luna Lovegood, Ginny Weasley, Astoria Greengrass and some other younger Slytherin girls Blaise invited. Blaise himself was behind the table, chuckling at Hermione’s question. He looked at her with a sly smirk and started opening many bottles of firewhiskey standing on that table.</p>
<p>-Seriously, guys, how did you get it?-Neville asked too, but gladly accepted the drink when Blaise poured him one.</p>
<p>-Hogsmeade, obviously,-Zabini said and continued giving out the drinks. Hermione kept torturing him until he gave up and admitted that they bought the drinks in Hogsmeade and transfigurated them into books to get them into the school. Filch didn’t suspect a thing.</p>
<p>-See, Granger, intelligence comes in many forms,-he finished his speech, and dried his glass.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Harry’s and Ron’s conflict was completely forgotten. They talked through everything they didn’t have a chance to discuss during those couple weeks over a few drinks. Harry was a little more careful, while Ron really took the celebration seriously and didn’t limit himself at all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-To the victory!-he exclaimed. The whole common room cheered and raised their glasses. Draco, who Harry was sure walked in with him, now was nowhere to be seen. Potter got up and started examining the room when he found Malfoy sitting near the window.</p>
<p>-Hey!-he approached him, handing another glass that Draco wasn’t going to drink,-What are you doing here? Come on!-Harry offered Draco his hand, planning to get him to the couch in the middle of the room, where the whole “party” was.</p>
<p>-It’s not exactly my scene…</p>
<p>-Oh, shut up,-Harry grabbed his hand himself, but Draco wasn’t exactly fighting him. Together, they sat down on an already very crowded couch, so close to each other, their hips and shoulders touched. Luna was telling some story, and honestly, for a bunch of drunk teenagers there was nothing better than a semi-realistic story from Lovegood. </p>
<p>-On the next game,-Harry said when Luna finished. He already started stumbling on words and forgetting what he was saying, but this topic seemed to have been so important to him, that his voice was firm again,-We have to make sure everyone uses the same brooms.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>  Hermione rolled her eyes, a couple of heads nodded, others had no idea where Harry was coming from.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-When has it been like that?-Justin Finch-Fletchley asked. Harry was still convinced Justin didn’t like him that much.</p>
<p>-It hasn’t, and it’s wrong! A fast broomstick can do a lot of work for a bad player.</p>
<p>-Well, it was fine today,-Megan Jones, the chaser of the team chimed in,-Seriously, Malfoy, bold move,-she said. Draco smiled slightly.</p>
<p>-Could be cheating,-the whole room turned towards the voice. Zacharias Smith and Michael Harris stood side by side, both sober, both not very welcomed here.</p>
<p>-Excuse me?-Ron chimed in. </p>
<p>-Your Seeker got off the broom. Still uncertain if he was allowed to use that move,-Zacharias said. Harry knew exactly why he was acting the way he was. He was pretty close to becoming the Chaser of the team, but Hannah Abbot scored one more Quaffle and the position was given to her. Zacharias wasn’t happy about it.</p>
<p>-What are you accusing me of, Smith?-Draco said. And Harry was glad to hear him standing up for himself.</p>
<p>-Cheating. Not so hard to understand, is it?-he smirked. A dozen of voices started chattering, trying to prove Zacharias wrong, or just insult him. It was hard to understand what most of them were saying.</p>
<p>-Starfish and Stick,-Hermione interrupted everyone with her strict loud words,-A move in professional Quidditch used both by Keepers, and sometimes by Seekers. That’s what Malfoy used. And he had his hand on the broom, if that matters to you, Smith,-she said, basically quoted the “Quidditch through the ages”. Ron looked at her with more love in his eyes than ever. No one said a word, but absolutely everyone looked impressed.</p>
<p>-Also, Smith?-she continued,-Nicholas Smith, Hufflepuff’s chaser, isn’t he your brother?</p>
<p>-He is. So?-Zacharias said.</p>
<p>-Well, next time try teaching him to score, instead of insulting actually good players,-she said</p>
<p> </p>
<p>	Zacharias didn’t have anything to say to that. No one did. He looked at Harris and together they walked out of the common room, slamming the door shut behind them. Hermione looked at Draco and they exchanged smiles.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So i'm very bad at writing sports game scene, but i did my best.<br/>Hope you enjoyed, please leave comments &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Turns out, there is nothing quite as forgettable as one victory in the school sports game. Despite Harry’s and Ron’s high expectations, it took Hogwarts less than a week to erase that legendary catch Malfoy performed from their memories. Draco wasn’t really surprised though. He didn’t allow himself to get used to all the attention he suddenly started getting; in the end, it was just a first game, there were others in the future and no one guaranteed Draco would be able to pull off a move like that again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Morning, guys,-Harry said, seeing Ron and Hermione in their usual spot in the Great Hall and one thought immediately struck him. He still struggled with weight of yet another secret upon his shoulders. He truly wanted to come clean to Ron and tell him about his visit to the Ministry that summer, but their relationship was getting better with every day, and Harry feared that telling him would ruin it all over again. He told himself (and Hermione) that he was waiting for a perfect moment, but to be honest, hardly any moment could be perfect to tell your best friend that you had defended a man they both hated at a time in court and then lied about it for months.</p>
<p>-Hi, Harry,-Ron was adorably oblivious. He was writing his homework right at the breakfast table, which Hermione never approved of, but the deeper they got into the year, the harder it was to keep up with their studies. Right before the graduation all 8<sup>th</sup> year students were supposed to pass an exam, the difficulty of which Hogwarts had never seen before. It was created specifically for them, and compared to it, N.E.W.T. seemed like a walk in the park.</p>
<p>-What if we skip Defense today?-Ron asked Harry, knowing he would never get a positive answer from Hermione,-I’m tired. And my Transfiguration essay isn’t even nearly done.</p>
<p>-I don’t know, Ron,-Harry started, but got distracted by Draco passing them. Harry took his bag off the seat next to him, freeing it for Malfoy, but he didn’t even look at it. Draco nodded at the trio and walked past them, taking his usual seat in the end of the table. Harry forgot all about Ron’s question and just watched Draco, while Ron and Hermione watched him.</p>
<p>-I thought you said you were friends,-Hermione said.</p>
<p>-He’s just too proud. I’ll be right back,-Harry got up and headed to Draco, not noticing how Ron and Hermione shared a glance, full of something Harry wouldn’t understand anyway.</p>
<p>-Morning, Malfoy,-Harry stood upon him. Draco looked up at him with a bored, lazy glance.</p>
<p>-Morning.</p>
<p>-Why are you sitting here?</p>
<p>-It’s breakfast,-Draco put a piece of an apple pie on his plate, ignoring Harry who still was standing right beside him, now gaining a lot of attention from other students.</p>
<p>-Funny,-Harry took Draco’s plate right from under his nose and calmly walked to Ron and Hermione.</p>
<p>-Hey!-just as Potter expected, Draco got up and followed him,-What are you doing? Potter!</p>
<p>-Nothing,-he put the plate on the spot next to his and sat down. For a second Draco just stood there in shock.</p>
<p>-I could just take a new one,-he said.</p>
<p>-I guess you could,-it was hard to explain what, but something made Draco sit down there. It was slightly humiliating, very weird and new, but also kind of…nice. He waited for Ron to start complaining, but he didn’t. At all. Well, not about Draco. He complained about homework for the whole breakfast.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               On the lunch and dinner Harry had to be creative with Draco again. He didn’t turn into a show, like on the breakfast, but when Malfoy tried to sneak to his old seat, he grabbed his bag from his hand, almost making Draco fall. The next morning it was enough for Harry to smile at Draco for him to sit next to them.</p>
<p>               Though the four of them now sat together in the Great Hall (and at most of the classes), it was still hard to say that the trio expanded into a quartet. Draco still had his…tendencies. Like disappearing after 9 pm and coming into the dorm well after the midnight. Or vanishing for a couple hours after the classes were over, sometimes missing the dinner too. Or even leaving Hogwarts for most of the weekends. Well, Harry could only assume he left Hogwarts, since he couldn’t be found on the Marauders’ map. Not that he was stalking him, no.</p>
<p>               Technically all of the 8<sup>th</sup> year students were allowed to leave school on the weekends, but Harry had no idea where he would want to go. Grimmauld place, just to spend to days all alone in the complete silence? Or the Burrow, to see Molly Weasley desperately trying to look as if she wasn’t completely broken? Neither of the options attracted Harry much and he knew that Draco had even smaller choice and just couldn’t imagine where he was going because the thought of him spending nights in the half-destroyed Manor was too horrible to even consider.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I wanted to ask you,-Hermione said to Harry. They were watching their Quidditch team training for the next match. Ron gave them a week of vacation, but now made them work harder than ever before.</p>
<p>-Me too, actually. You go first.</p>
<p>-When are you planning to tell Ron about Malfoy?-Harry sighed,-You know that technically you are making me lie to him too?</p>
<p>-I’m just waiting.</p>
<p>-For what?</p>
<p>-For him to get along with Draco. Maybe then he’ll understand that he was innocent and I did what I had to do.</p>
<p>-They already get along just fine! Look at them!-at that exact moment, Ron was giving Malfoy a pat on the shoulder for another well-caught snitch. Harry would rather have them fight.</p>
<p>-I’ll do it, I promise.</p>
<p>-Before the ball,-she said. Harry did math in his head, there were three weeks left until the ball.</p>
<p>-Why? Why?</p>
<p>-Before the Ball,-she repeated firmly. Harry groaned and nodded,-What did you want to ask?</p>
<p>-I…well, it’s nothing,-Hermione looked at him,-Okay, did you notice that Malfoy is never in the castle on the weekends?</p>
<p>-Not really,-what Hermione wanted to say was that she hardly notices anything except for the textbooks on the weekends since she has to be her homework and correct the homework of two other idiots she had misfortune to befriend, but decided to keep it inside.</p>
<p>-I just wonder where he goes. His mother is in France, his house is…basically ruined,-Harry said.</p>
<p>-I don’t think he goes there. And Harry, whatever you do, just don’t follow him, okay? Try asking him first.</p>
<p>-You think I didn’t? It’s like he’s allergic to straight-forward answers,-Harry said, frustrated. Hermione smiled,-What?</p>
<p>-Nothing,- she quickly looked away.</p>
<p>-And to your knowledge, I wasn’t going to follow him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               That wasn’t even a lie, technically. Harry had already discovered that he couldn’t follow Malfoy to wherever he was going. Last Saturday, Draco left the castle at 6 am, walked to Hogsmeade and apparated. Harry stood there in his pajamas and invisibility cloak for about an hour and then went back to have breakfast.</p>
<p>               Same thing happened again this weekend. Harry spent it wondering where Malfoy was and why did he leave, except this time, he wasn’t the only person missing in the Hogwarts. It could have been completely unrelated but Luna Lovegood also was nowhere to be found. She could have been visiting her father at home. Or a friend. Or anyone. But something told Harry it was more than just a coincidence they both quietly disappeared.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I knew it!-Harry looked out the window of his dorm and then at the clock. 11 pm, Sunday. Draco and Luna were walking towards the castle, discussing something. Harry tried to think of a single reason why they could have spent that weekend together and each of his guesses was more insane than a previous one. A romantic gateway? Draco and Luna? No way.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry pretended to be asleep when Draco walked into the dorm. He knew that even if he tried to get anything out of him, he’d fail. So, Potter had one option. Wait till the morning and ask Luna. She rarely lied.</p>
<p>               Harry couldn’t think of anything better than waking up earlier and going up to Ravenclaw’s common room. Trying to be as quiet as possible and not wake up his sleeping dormmates, Harry walked out of his common room and headed to Ravenclaw’s. He wasn’t worrying about sounding insane to Luna. Of all people, she’d understand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Harry!-turned out Lovegood was an early bird too and Harry met her half way to their tower,-What are you doing here?</p>
<p>-I…I wanted to walk you to the Great Hall,-he said, blushing from his lies.</p>
<p>-How nice of you. Let’s go,-for a while they remained silent, Luna looking ahead of herself with her dreamy gaze and Harry wondering how to start that conversation.</p>
<p>-So…how was your weekend?-he asked.</p>
<p>-Interesting. Yours?</p>
<p>-Great, great. And what did you do?</p>
<p>-Nothing unusual,-Luna smiled. Harry was losing his patience.</p>
<p>-Luna, yesterday I saw you coming back to the castle with D…Malfoy. Were you together?-he asked. His question didn’t surprise Luna at all.</p>
<p>-We met, yes.</p>
<p>-Where, if I may ask?</p>
<p>-You may not,-Luna smiled again. They almost reached the Great Hall.</p>
<p>-What? Why?</p>
<p>-Draco asked to keep it between us. But it was very lovely of you to walk me here, Harry,-she touched his arm and walked to the Ravenclaw table. Harry stood in shock, now more invested in what Hermione would call “not his business” than ever.         </p>
<p> </p>
<p>               “Keep it between us”. What? What did Draco not want people to know? What did he want to hide from Harry? Why? Was Harry the only one who actually considered them friends? Yes, Draco started opening up to him, he did it slowly, but Harry had to respect his pace. But was it different with Luna? How come he’s already “Draco” to her, while Harry is still “Potter” to him? Has he been secretly dating her this whole time? And is this why he didn’t want to accept Harry’s friendship, because he already had a loved one in his life and didn’t need or want him?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Potter, I can’t believe you are so focused on the History of Magic,-Draco himself tore Harry away from his thoughts. Harry woke up and found himself in the class, sitting next to smirking Draco. And for the first time in a while, that smirk pissed him off.</p>
<p>-Shut up,-he said, but not in his usual playful tone</p>
<p>-Someone’s moody,-Draco said, kicking him with his elbow,-What’s wrong again?</p>
<p>-Nothing,-Harry mumbled. Ron and Hermione were sitting right before them, the whole class was silent, but one question was boiling inside of Harry, threatening to come out any time.</p>
<p>-Come on, Potter, your head can’t handle that many thoughts at a time.</p>
<p>-Are you dating Luna?-Harry finally asked, turning his whole body to Draco. A couple of heads turned to them too, but neither Draco nor Harry cared.</p>
<p>-What?-Draco looked shocked enough for Harry to start doubting his theory, but not enough for him to drop it.</p>
<p>-Luna. Lovegood. Are you dating her?-Harry lowered his voice to whisper.</p>
<p>-Of course no! Why would you even think that?-he asked</p>
<p>-I saw you yesterday!</p>
<p>-Doing what?!</p>
<p>-Coming back here! Nearly at midnight!</p>
<p>-And that automatically means we’re dating? Potter, have you lost your mind?</p>
<p>-You’ve been together for two days somewhere else, what was I supposed to think?-Harry could only hope that Draco wouldn’t point out that it actually shouldn’t have bothered him at all.</p>
<p>-Anything but that?</p>
<p>-I asked Luna, she said you asked to “keep it between you two”-Harry made air quotes.</p>
<p>-Mister Malfoy, Mister Potter, if you don’t pay attention to the class, at least don’t distract others,- professor Binns interrupted them.</p>
<p>-Sorry, sir,-Harry mumbled, but quickly turned back to Draco,-So? Are you going to admit it now?</p>
<p>-I am not dating anyone, especially Luna,-he said. And Harry couldn’t help but notice he said “Luna”. Not just “Lovegood”</p>
<p>-Then what were you doing yesterday? And almost every weekend before that?-Draco hesitated to answer. Harry nodded and turned to his book. He still felt angry from being lied to, but now he was much sadder.</p>
<p>-Fine, Potter, I’ll tell you,-Draco said through his teeth,-Just not here and not now.</p>
<p>-When?-Draco shrugged,-Library, tonight. You’ll help me with the potions assignment,-Harry said, as if he had a right to demand anything from Draco. Malfoy sighed and mumbled “Fine”.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Till the rest of the day Harry kept guessing and building theories on what could have taken up Malfoy’s weekends. He couldn’t focus during the classes, and hardly paid attention to Ron and Hermione during the lunch. But as soon as the last class finished, he grabbed all his things and ran to the library, determined to finally find out the truth.</p>
<p>               Of course, he was too early. Draco showed up about an hour later, slowly walking into the library, saying hi to Madam Pince, as if no one was waiting for him, as if he hadn’t made any promises earlier.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-So?-Harry asked the second Draco sat down opposite to him.</p>
<p>-So?-Draco repeated, pulling his textbooks out of the bag,-Oh, right. Potions.</p>
<p>-No! You promised to tell what’s going on with you and Luna.</p>
<p>-Nothing!-Draco looked around to make sure no one had heard the nonsense out of Potter’s lips,-I already told you!</p>
<p>-Then where were you yesterday?-Harry asked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>“Please don’t ask me why I care so much”</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Why do you even care so much?-Draco asked,-Voldemort is dead, I’m not doing anything illegal</p>
<p>-I wasn’t accusing you of anything like this!-Draco finally left his school supplies alone and looked at Harry.</p>
<p>-Why can’t you just believe my words? I’m not doing anything “bad” and I’m not dating Luna,-he groaned.</p>
<p>-We are going in circles here, Malfoy,-Harry said. He wasn’t going to drop this. Draco was only about to find out that Potter’s stubbornness doesn’t know any limit.</p>
<p>-Fine!-he looked down and mumbled something Harry didn’t quite catch.</p>
<p>-Come again?</p>
<p>-I volunteer at…..,-once again, the last part of the sentence remined unclear.</p>
<p>-You volunteer where?</p>
<p>-At the orphanage! Okay? You heard me now?-Harry was, to say the least, shocked. Not just by Draco’s “secret”, but by the way he acted now. He looked embarrassed, shy. It was definitely a new look on Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Orphanage?-Harry asked. Draco nodded quickly, still not meeting eyes with him,-That’s where you’ve been going every weekend?-another nod. Harry didn’t know how to react, but he had a thousand questions in his head.</p>
<p>-You’re happy now? Can we move to the potions?</p>
<p>-Wait…are you serious? Do the children recognize you?-Harry didn’t know why he decided to start with that question. But to be fair, there had been time when the faces of the whole Malfoy family  (Draco included) decorated the front page of numerous editions of the Daily Prophet.</p>
<p>-Some do,-he answered and Harry could tell it wasn’t a pleasant topic for him.</p>
<p>-And what do they do when they see you?</p>
<p>-They get angry, of course. They yell, cry, some try to beat me up,-Draco sighed,-But the administrator of the orphanage says it’s good for them to release anger that way.</p>
<p>-I…,-Harry felt like he didn’t recognize the person in front of him. But in a good way,-Draco, it’s amaz…</p>
<p>-Stop,-Draco interrupted him,-I don’t want to talk about it, okay? Ever, if possible.</p>
<p>-Okay,-Harry nodded,-I just wanted to say that...I would really want to go with you next week. If that’s okay,-Draco looked at him and after a short pause nodded, looking at least a little more relaxed. </p>
<p>-So? Potions now?-he asked and Harry smiled</p>
<p>-Yes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry had to admit. Learning Potions with Draco was way easier, more effective and even pleasant than with Slughorn. He didn’t rush and yell as Harry thought he would, he explained everything Harry didn’t understand, which was…a lot and he wasn’t really surprised when Harry asked him questions about the most trivial things, yet didn’t show it. In a couple hours Draco got Harry all caught up on what they were studying and for the first time since he had gotten rid of the Half Blood Prince’s textbook, Potter was actually excited to step into the Potions class.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Harry?-at first Potter didn’t even notice that someone was standing beside him. He was laughing at something Draco had said, and Malfoy had to nod at the poor girl for Harry to look at her.</p>
<p>-Oh, hi,-Potter didn’t recognize her. Her tie said she was from Ravenclaw, 7<sup>th</sup> year he assumed. But neither her name, nor her last name appeared in his head.</p>
<p>-I’m Hazel. Hazel Durd,-the girl said. Harry nodded and pretended that he knew her, of course he did,-I was hoping I could talk to you.</p>
<p>-Sure, I’m listening,-Harry tried to seem friendly, but had no idea what was on Hazel’s mind.</p>
<p>-Uhm, okay,-the girl clearly hoped for some privacy and threw an unsatisfied glance at Draco,-I was wondering if you…wanted to go to the Ball with me?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               The Ball. Of course. It was two weeks away and Harry spent last month literally running away from the girls of all houses and most courses. No, he didn’t have a date yet, even a potential one, but he also didn’t want to go with a stranger.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Oh,-Harry chuckled nervously and looked at Draco, terrified. He let down his defenses for a while and it didn’t pay off,-I would love to, really. But I already have a date,-his lie was so clear that Draco groaned.</p>
<p>-Really?-Hazel saw it too,-Who, if it’s not a secret?</p>
<p>-Who?-Harry scrolled through a list of all the girls he knew in his mind. It was surprisingly short,-Ginny, of course.</p>
<p>-No,-the girl said,-Ginny has a date,-Harry wasn’t really surprised by that, but still felt a small shot of something remotely similar to jealousy</p>
<p>-Yeah, I know. Did I say Ginny? I meant Luna,-Draco actively shook his head, but it was too late. Hazel knew he was lying.</p>
<p>-Luna also has a date. You can just tell me you don’t want to go with me,-under no circumstances would Harry say that. He would rather spend the rest of the night composing lies than hurt that girl with the truth. He looked at Draco with silent plea in his eyes to get him out of this social nightmare.</p>
<p>-Fine, Potter, you can tell her,-Draco said, rolling his eyes. Both Harry and Hazel were confused.</p>
<p>-Tell me what?-she asked.</p>
<p>-Who you are actually going with. You can tell her,-Harry’s brain had never been particularly fast, but in stressful situation like this one it turned off completely. So Potter just starred at Draco with the most idiotic, confused and horrified expression.</p>
<p>-He’s going with me,-Draco said confidently to Hazel,-We agreed not to tell anyone now, but you deserve to know the truth. Right?-Draco looked at Harry.</p>
<p>-Yeah…Yes, yes, of course!-Harry sat up and said,-We are together…going together, I mean!-he corrected himself,-It’s true, yes.</p>
<p>-Huh,-Hazel looked at them skeptically. Harry had an idea to take Draco’s hand, but at the last moment thought it would be too much,-Alright…See you around,-she left and only after her figure walked out of the library and disappeared in the halls, Harry could relax. He started laughing, unable to believe what just happened.</p>
<p>-You are a horrible liar, Potter,-Draco said, smiling too. His cheeks were slightly pink, while Harry’s face was bright red.</p>
<p>-It was amazing, oh my God,-he kept laughing, already gaining strict glances from Madam Pince,-You just saved my life, Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Well, that’s not really what happened. But you are unbelievably dumb. Do you not know any other girls?</p>
<p>-How was I supposed to know they both have dates? Who is Luna going with anyway?-Harry asked, no hoping for an answer.</p>
<p>-Ginny.</p>
<p>-Ginny?-Harry asked, shocked. Draco nodded,-As friends?-Draco shook his head. Harry needed a moment to process it,-How do you even know it?</p>
<p>-She told me,-Draco replied.</p>
<p>-Ginny?-the world in which Ginny Weasley shares the details of her love life with Draco Malfoy just couldn’t exist in Harry’s brain.</p>
<p>-No, Luna.</p>
<p>-Oh, right. You are friends now,-Harry said. It was unusual too, but it was Luna they were talking about. She loved the unusual.</p>
<p>-Well, friends is too strong of a word.</p>
<p>-How did it even happen? When?</p>
<p>-In the beginning of the year I think,-Draco said,-I ran into her and decided to apologize and she...hugged me,-Draco said as if he was admitting a defeat. Harry decided not to comment on the “apologize” part.</p>
<p>-And you allowed it?</p>
<p>-To be fair, I didn’t really have a say in the matter,-both Harry and Draco laughed,-Seriously though, you need to find a date for that Ball as soon as possible. In a few seconds the whole school will think you are actually going with me,-Draco said, writing something down. Harry nodded, but then an idea struck him.</p>
<p>-Yes! In a few seconds the whole school will think we are going together!-Harry repeated. Draco looked at him the way people look at an insane person,-What do you say we give them a show?</p>
<p>-What do you mean?</p>
<p>-Can you even imagine their faces if we actually show up on the ball together?-Harry didn’t specify who “they” were. In fact, he looked so carried away and excited by his own idea that Draco started feeling a little weird.</p>
<p>-Are you serious?</p>
<p>-Hell yes! Or you have a better candidate to be your date?-Draco thought of the Greengrass sisters, whom he knew even before they started studying together and and one of whom had a long-lasting crush on him. She wouldn’t say no. Neither of them would, actually. And though Draco never really knew them, he could tell they both were very, very pretty.</p>
<p>-No, I don’t,-he said. The fire of excitement started burning up in him too.</p>
<p>-Neither do I! So? You’re in?-it was the most insane thing Draco could do. He wasn’t even planning to go to that Ball, and now he actually considered showing up hand in hand with Harry damn Potter.</p>
<p>-Okay, fine,-Draco said, chuckling. Harry looked at him with disbelief in his eyes.</p>
<p>-Really?</p>
<p>-Yeah! I mean, if you want it.</p>
<p>-Yes! We’re going,-Harry raised his hand for a high-five, and probably for the first time in his life, Draco gave him (or anyone) a high-five. In a moment they returned to their study, but neither could focus. What just happened didn’t feel real. It didn’t feel real at all.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Heeeeey<br/>Here's a new part, hope you like it!<br/>Yesterday i passed my *last* exam and now i'm free!!!! I'mma post more often now, especially if you give me some feedback hahaha.<br/>Either way, thank you for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s been a while since Harry had to wake up this early on a Saturday. With the first rays of sunshine, him and Draco left the castle to visit the orphanage Malfoy volunteered in. Walking down the empty, still dark halls at 6 in the morning felt rather surrealistic. Silent Malfoy didn’t make a picture any more normal for Harry.</p>
<p>               They reached Hogsmeade almost without talking. A couple times Draco asked if Harry actually wanted to do it, warned him that not all kids are welcoming and that he really didn’t have to go with him. Harry listened and nodded at Draco, not even doubting his decision to go. Yes, he was nervous. Very nervous. But there was a number of reasons why Harry wanted to visit that orphanage and they outweighed his nerves and fear.</p>
<p>               Apparently, Hogsmeade is even more beautiful in early morning. Calmness and indifference of empty bars and stores attracted, the birds singing for no one but them created intimate but not awkward atmosphere. Harry breathed in cold morning air and smiled. The view and this feeling were worth being a little sleep-deprived.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Ready?-Draco asked Harry.</p>
<p>-Yeah. We’ll apparate?-Draco nodded, but it was clear that it was Malfoy who had to apparate them both. Harry had no idea where they were going and how to get there.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Feeling just a bit shy, Draco took Harry by his arm and closed his eyes. He had to learn to apparate in rather extreme conditions; Narcissa taught him herself during the summer a year ago. They had to use every opportunity and practice during those short moments when Voldemort was away and didn’t control every Malfoy’s step. That’s why Draco wasn’t very confident in his apparition skills. Especially if there was another person, he was responsible for.</p>
<p>               Thankfully, everything went fine. When Draco opened his eyes, they were already standing in front of a rather small building, not far from the Diagon Alley. Only a few people, rushing to their work, were around, besides that – same silence.</p>
<p>               Draco whispered a secret password into the door and it opened, revealing a long hall with many many doors by both sides of it. Following Malfoy in, Harry felt weird case of déjà vu. This place reminded him of an orphanage from Tom Riddle’s memories. It was much lighter and more welcoming, but still, it was a sad place. One that presumably pushed little Tom over the edge of madness. One Harry himself could have ended up in. He wondered if living there was better than with Dursleys.</p>
<p>               After a minute of waiting, a short woman walked out of one of the doors. She gasped and smiled as soon as she saw Draco.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Draco! Thank Merlin you came, Lucy had been crying for days!-she grabbed him by the arm and started leading him towards one of the rooms, either not noticing or ignoring Harry, who was still behind them. But Draco stopped her and nodded at him, thinking that a person like Potter didn’t need an introduction.</p>
<p>-Oh, you brought a friend again, how swell!-she said. Her glasses were hanging on the chain around her neck and once she took them on to see who Draco’s plus-one was, her hand shot up to her chest and the glasses fell back off,-Oh dear…Harry Potter!</p>
<p>-Good morning, Madam,-Harry said, trying to force a smile. Such reactions never flattered him. And Draco smirking behind the back of the woman didn’t help too.</p>
<p>-It is such honor to meet you, Mister Potter,-she rushed towards him, grabbed his hand and started shaking it so fiercely that Harry worried it would fall of,- I’m Analise Polkinghorne, the head of this orphanage. What brings you here, Mister Potter?-her eyes sparkled with admiration and happiness. It reminded Harry of the first time Ron had met Victor Krum.</p>
<p>-I came with Draco. To help,-Harry said, feeling exceptionally stupid and out-of-place,-And please call me Harry.</p>
<p>-Harry! Of course, Harry! What a kind soul! What a kind soul!-Madam Polkinghorne exclaimed again and again,-The children will wake up any minute now. I need to make sure the breakfast is ready,-she looked at the clock. Harry could tell the woman had a billion worries and responsibilities here,-Draco will show you around, right?-Malfoy nodded. Analise smiled to them, tears in her eyes and ran to the kitchen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Draco lead Harry to one of the rooms, in the very end of the hall. The hall itself was rather narrow and Harry had to walk behind Draco to fit there. Carefully and as quietly as possible Draco opened the door. There were six little girls, all sleeping, not one older than 6. Draco smiled slightly, but erased his smile as he saw Potter looking at him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-So these are children’s rooms,-Draco said, closing the door after himself and pointing at a few others,-There are 10 of them, 6 children in each room. That’s the kitchen and the canteen,-he pointed at the room Madam  Polkinghorne disappeared in,-And that’s the play room,-he nodded at the only door left. The orphanage was painfully small, obviously lacked the founding, but it was clean, and it seemed like the owner really loved these children.</p>
<p>-Is Madam Polkinghorne the only one who works here?-Harry asked.</p>
<p>-No, there are also her daughters and a few friends. And some house elves working at the kitchen and cleaning the place. But they are so old that they aren’t much help. Other than that, volunteers,-Draco explained.</p>
<p>-That’s horrible! It’s not nearly enough for 60 children!-Draco shrugged.</p>
<p>-It’s not even the worst one,-he said and wanted to add something, but the door behind them opened and a small curly girl walked out, wiping her eyes. Harry’s heart shrunk looking at her.</p>
<p>-Draco?-she asked, but couldn’t pronounce the letter “r” correctly and Harry had never heard Malfoy’s name said with so much tenderness.</p>
<p>-Hey,-he kneeled in front of her,-Why are you awake so early?</p>
<p>-I thought I heard you,-she said and wrapped her small arms around his neck. Draco hugged her back and smiled,-You promised to come sooner.</p>
<p>-I know, I’m sorry,-Draco mumbled, letting go of the girl,-Say Hi to your guest, Lucy,-Draco pointed at Harry, who was standing aside from them, feeling like an intruder,-This is Harry Potter.</p>
<p>-Harry Potter!-she gasped. Harry couldn’t help but smile at the way she said his name,-I know you!</p>
<p>-Yeah?-Harry also lowered himself before the girl,-And what is your name?</p>
<p>-Lucy. Lucy Wilson,-she said,-I live here now. And Draco is my friend.</p>
<p>-Really?-Harry smiled brighter. Draco started laughing.</p>
<p>-Yes. Are you friends too?-Lucy asked. Harry looked at Draco for a second and nodded.</p>
<p>-Yes. Yes, we are,-Harry said.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Lucy had about a billion questions to Potter. Everything concerning his current life, his friendship with Draco, all the rumors about him she had heard, and of course, war. Harry did believe that lying was wrong, even to children, but he didn’t even consider telling this little girl all the truths about everything she asked.</p>
<p>               The day ended surprisingly quickly, but was so bright and full of events that neither Harry nor Draco even noticed how children’s bed time approached. They played with kids all day, helped feed them, tried teaching them some basic skills like reading or elementary math, but that didn’t go well. (Draco also found out how ridiculously bad Harry was at math and definitely didn’t let that go unnoticed). Lucy hadn’t let go of Draco since the moment she woke up. The kids who weren’t as welcoming to Draco just ignored him and gave all their attention to Harry. He really was the star of the day. No one could believe The Harry Potter had come to their orphanage. Harry tried to answer to their questions, but they were truly endless. Some children didn’t ask anything though. They looked at Potter with something close to fear in their eyes. And it was absolutely heart-breaking for Harry to see it, the whole day was rather sad, but some of the parents of these kids died fighting, trying to help Harry. Which made him feel responsible for their deaths.</p>
<p>               Lucy and Draco, with their perfect harmony, tried to distract Harry when they saw how his mood suddenly went down. And when it was time to go to sleep, Lucy demanded a personal bed-time story from both of them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-I had no idea you were this good with children,-Harry whispered to Draco. Lucy was already sleeping, her head on Malfoy’s lap. He was carefully stroking her hair.</p>
<p>-I’m not,-Draco said,-We just got along right away. She said I looked like her brother,-Harry already saw some similarity between Malfoy and the girl. Snow-white hair, pale skin. But her eyes were bright blue and she smiled way more often.</p>
<p>-Does she know about…well,-Harry asked, regretting it right away, but Draco knew what he wanted to know without even him having to say that.</p>
<p>-Yeah, they all know. Some even asked to see the Mark,-Draco said sighing,-Honestly, I was surprised Madam Polkinghorne even allowed me to be here, but she said that it was okay, that I was acquitted. But really she just needs all the help she can get.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry watched as Draco put Lucy into her bed and checked other kids. To be honest, even after spending a day there with him, it still amazed Harry that Draco was actually doing this. Spending last bits of his free time with these children, not expecting anything in return. It went against everything Harry thought he knew about Malfoy, about Slytherins. And even if he was doing it just to calm his conscience down, it didn’t change anything. Draco was doing something significant, something that mattered, and didn’t tell a soul about it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Are they asleep?-Madam Polkinghorne ran into Draco and Harry as soon as they exited children’s room. Draco nodded at her question,-Very well. Should I be expecting you tomorrow?-another nod. Analise smiled and turned to Harry.</p>
<p>-Harry, dear, it’s been a pleasure to have you here,-Harry blushed slightly. She reminded him of Molly Weasley. Strict and demanding to her own children, and endlessly kind to Harry.</p>
<p>-Thank you,-Harry said and saw a short gray-skinned man walking out of the kitchen. It was one of the house-elves and when Draco said they were “old”, it was a compliment. He was…ancient. With a groan he bowed to everyone present and looked up at Madam Polkinghorne with his light gray eyes.</p>
<p>-Shrong has finished cleaning the kitchen,-he said.</p>
<p>-Very well, Shrong,-the elf breathed very loudly and his posture was very far from straight. If all the elves here are as old as him, Harry wondered how they get anything done. And that’s when he had an idea.</p>
<p>-Madam Polkinghorne ,-he started,-I have a house elf myself. Inherited him with the house. I don’t really need him, and I think he could use some company too. Maybe he could come in handy here?-Analise’s eyes lit up.</p>
<p>-But Mister Potter, are you sure you don’t want to keep him?-she asked, but in her head she had already come up with a thousand of ways a new elf could help around.</p>
<p>-No, really. He’s not very young too, but…help is help, right?-she nodded. Tears were shining in her eyes,-Kreacher? I need you,-Harry said and a second later Harry’s old pal appeared in front of them.</p>
<p>-Master Potter had called for Kreacher,-he said, bowing down.</p>
<p>-Yes. This is your new home,-Harry said. Kreacher’s face expressed shock, then horror.</p>
<p>-Master Potter must be confused…,-he mumbled.</p>
<p>-I’m not. You are much more needed here,-Kreacher looked around. Merlin, there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do to go back home.</p>
<p>-But how will Master Potter manage the house by himself? Should Kreacher remind Master Potter of a time he had tried to cook a meal?-he asked.</p>
<p>-No, no, you definitely should not,-Harry smiled nervously, seeing Draco chuckling,-I am perfectly capable of managing myself,-he said to Kreacher and to Madam Polkinghorne , as she started worrying about Harry not having the help again,-I’m in Hogwarts now and then I’ll be living alone. I’ll be fine.</p>
<p>-Is Master Potter sure?-Kreacher made one last attempt to hold on to his home.</p>
<p>-Yes, absolutely. Madam Polkinghorne is your new master, you’ll do whatever she orders,-Kreacher sighed. He wasn’t able not to comply, but he could have given them all an attitude about it,-And you will behave. And be nice to all the children.</p>
<p>-Children?-Kreacher asked, horrified. Harry nodded,-Whatever Master Potter wishes…</p>
<p>-Good,-Harry said. He tried not to think about it, but he had to admit, it was kind of sad parting with Kreacher. Harry had grown used to him.</p>
<p>-Shrong will show him around,-Madam Polkinghorne said and two elves walked away, both mumbling something.</p>
<p>-He’s a bit grumpy, but…,-Harry said. He didn’t actually have anything to add to that.</p>
<p>-Mister Potter, your generosity knows no limit!-she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around Harry’s neck. Her hugs were just like her hand-shakes. Tight, warm, loving,-Thank you, thank you so much!</p>
<p>-It’s nothing,-Harry said once he was finally released,-I’m glad to help.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               After a thousand more thanks, a hundred hugs and a few tears, Harry and Draco finally walked out of the orphanage. The sun had already disappeared, but the stars lighted their way just as beautifully. Harry breathed the fresh air and didn’t really feel like going anywhere in particular. Just walking around, maybe till the very sunrise, would be great.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-So I would like to hear about that one time you tried to cook,-Draco said and Harry laughed.</p>
<p>-Nothing bad really happened, he’s exaggerating</p>
<p>-How big was the fire?</p>
<p>-THERE WAS NO FIRE!-both boys laughed, both avoiding the inevitable. Draco was supposed to come back tomorrow, and Harry planned to tag along. But going back to Hogwarts just to spend the night…neither felt like it.</p>
<p>-Where do you stay for the night usually?-Harry asked. They walked towards the Diagon Alley, taking their time.</p>
<p>-Last week we stayed at Luna’s house. It was…weird. Usually they either give me the room at the orphanage or I go back to school,-he said.</p>
<p>-I don’t want to go back to school now.</p>
<p>-You want to come back tomorrow?-Draco asked, clearly expecting negative answer.</p>
<p>-Of course,-Harry said.</p>
<p>-I thought the elf was like a final gift</p>
<p>-Oh, shut up,-Harry knocked Draco’s shoulder with his, still smiling. Draco laughed too.</p>
<p>-So if you say no to Hogwarts, any other ideas?</p>
<p>-Actually yes,-Harry said,-We’ll apparate,-he reached for Draco’s hand, but Malfoy moved away.</p>
<p>-Tell me where we’re going first.</p>
<p>-Do you not trust me?-Harry asked, acting insulted.</p>
<p>-Do you want me to be honest?</p>
<p>-Oh, come on,-he grabbed Draco’s hands,-I won’t kill you. Not tonight.</p>
<p>-I hope so,-Draco said, but allowed Harry to hold his hands. Trusted him. It was flattering. So flattering that Harry started getting nervous and the clear picture of their destination he was supposed to imagine wouldn’t come to his head.</p>
<p>-Are we just going to stand here like this?-Draco asked, nodding at their touching hands.</p>
<p>-Give me a second!-Harry did his best to clear his mind. It worked. With a loud clap they disappeared and when Draco and Harry opened their eyes, they were already standing in front of the number 12 Grimmauld Place. Muggles’ houses moved sideways, revealing Harry’s. Draco gasped.</p>
<p>-The House of Blacks!-he exclaimed,-You live here?</p>
<p>-Yes,-Harry expected different reaction,-Have you been here?</p>
<p>-A couple times when I was younger,-Draco was rather excited to go in, see what had changed since the last time he had been there. It’s been more than 10 years, back then Blacks and Malfoys were one big, dysfunctional family.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               House met them with indifferent silence and darkness. Harry quickly turned on the lights, but it didn’t help much. It was just the atmosphere, the spirit that inhabited 12 Grimmauld Place that made it constantly dark and lonely inside.</p>
<p>               Draco walked around the halls, noticing little details about it that stayed in his memory through all these years. There wasn’t much, just blurry images in his head, fractions of real memories. But Draco did feel nostalgic being there. He missed the times when his happiness was obvious and real.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-What’s that?-Draco asked looking at a portrait, covered with some cloth.</p>
<p>-Don’t touch it!-Harry was too late, the cloth went on the floor and the portrait of Walburga Black, Sirius’s mother, was revealed. Harry groaned as she opened her eyes and looked around with the same arrogance in her eyes as usual,-That’s Sirius’s mom, Walburga Black.</p>
<p>-How dare you speak my name, filthy mudblood!-she exclaimed right away and looked at Draco,-Hm…introduce yourself, young man!-she ordered.</p>
<p>-My name is Draco Malfoy, ma’am,-Draco said, bowing down. Woman on the portrait was rather satisfied with him.</p>
<p>-Oh, finally someone with manners, someone pure!-her hands touched her chest as she sighed,-You are the son of Narcissa and Lucius, aren’t you?</p>
<p>-Yes, ma’am.</p>
<p>-I remember you. Of course I remember you, my dear boy,-she smiled. Harry had never seen her do that,-Lucius is a very decent man. I remember how happy my brother was the day he asked to marry Narcissa. How are they doing?</p>
<p>-They’re…,-Draco stumbled for a second,-They’re great. They send their love, ma’am.</p>
<p>-Oh, how I wish it was your family that inherited the house, dear Draco. I am sure you are as insulted as I am to see who is of possession of it now,-she said, looking at Harry.</p>
<p>-Oh, yes, absolutely. Very insulted,-Draco said, hiding a smile and hoping Walburga doesn’t sense his sarcasm.</p>
<p>-What brings you here, anyway?</p>
<p>-I…,-Draco threw a quick glance at Harry,-I don’t want to bother you with this long, boring story, ma’am.</p>
<p>-Well, I was very happy to see you, Draco,-she said,-Send my best to your parents.</p>
<p>-Of course,-he bowed down again and went into the living room with Harry. Potter, who heard every bit of that conversation felt like he was about to explode.</p>
<p>-Very insulted?-he asked, once they very far enough from the portrait so that its owner wouldn’t hear them,-Very insulted, really?</p>
<p>-Well…,-Draco shrugged. Harry threw his jacket on the couch.</p>
<p>-Oh, you don’t actually think I don’t deserve to be here because of my blood?-with all the changes that Draco had been going through recently, Harry even forgot about his blood-related prejudices. And he definitely didn’t want to rediscover them again.</p>
<p>-No, I don’t,-Draco replied, taking off his coat,-But isn’t it just easier to agree with her than have a whole discussion?-Harry was surprised to hear it. To be honest, he never even thought about that before. When it came to the lady on that portrait, he either avoided any interaction with her, or argued and fought until they both got so tired that they lost the track of time and the conversation. And now, Harry tried to listen closer. For the first time in 3 years, the portrait was uncovered, but remained silent. She wasn’t complaining, wasn’t mumbling insults and racial slurs, didn’t beg Merlin to “give her a salvation from these abominations who now occupied her home”.</p>
<p>-I suppose…</p>
<p>-See? Manners pay off sometimes,-Harry rolled his eyes and headed to the kitchen. With all the work that had to get done in the orphanage that day, both of them completely forgot about eating. Harry hadn’t eaten anything since yesterday’s dinner and his stomach started reminding him about it.</p>
<p>               But as he opened the fridge, he found nothing but an old apple, a box of spoiled milk and left-over pizza that already started growing other forms of life on itself.</p>
<p>-What’s that?-Draco asked as Harry slammed the fridge door shut.</p>
<p>-A fridge,-Harry mumbled, thinking about where he was going to get food. But Draco’s confused face told him that a word “fridge” meant absolutely nothing to him,-It’s like a…an ice box! It’s cold there and muggles use it to keep their food fresh.</p>
<p>-And why would you need it?</p>
<p>-To keep my food fresh?-he smiled,-I don’t know, I got used to it in Dursley’s and decided to get one for myself too.</p>
<p>-I can’t even imagine a scandal that happened here when Mrs Black saw this thing,-Draco said.</p>
<p>-It was…indescribable, she didn’t shut up for weeks,-Harry said,-Okay, how do you feel about muggle food?</p>
<p>-Disgusting,-Draco’s reply came right away.</p>
<p>-Have you ever tried some?</p>
<p>-No, and I don’t need to, to know that it is disgusting.</p>
<p>-It’s not. And I’m gonna prove you wrong,-Harry said, grabbing his jacket off of the couch. The very expansive, very old couch that stood there for years.</p>
<p>-Potter, no!-Draco followed him while Harry tried to make his way to front door.</p>
<p>-Malfoy, yes. I’ll get us dinner, you stay here and…don’t be too polite to the portraits. They’ll get used to it,-Harry said and walked out, before Draco could stop him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now that he was alone, Draco finally had a moment to think. He was in Harry’s house. Alone. Because he went to get them some food – some muggle food – because he wanted Draco to try it. And before that, they spent a whole day together, taking care of children. And a day before that, they decided to go to a ball together. And not a single fight, not one punch or an insult. It was endlessly, unbelievably weird, but at the same time so damn right that Draco wondered how come that had spent 7 years of their lives doing anything but that?</p>
<p>               Harry came back in 30 minutes, holding a rectangular box and a bottle of something dark. While he was gone, Draco took courage to examine the house a bit more. He walked through the large living room on the first floor, the kitchen in the end of the hall. Looked at all the portraits, recognized a few faces. Then he made his way upstairs. All the doors were closed and Draco didn’t open any. Same situation was on other floors and after making sure of it, Draco went back downstairs to wait for Harry. If he wanted to appear as a decent host, he was supposed to be the one to give the tour.</p>
<p>               Even if Harry did plan to do that, he really wanted to eat first. Potter did his best to lay the table, but if Sirius’s mother saw what was brought to her old table, in her old kitchen, she would have a heart attack.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-What is this?-Draco asked pointing at pizza Harry brought. He seemed to have asked that question for a thousandth time that day.</p>
<p>-It’s pizza and you know what it is,-Harry put a plate in front of Draco and poured him a glass of coke.</p>
<p>-And this?</p>
<p>-A muggle drink. Come on, just try it,-Draco still looked skeptical, but when Harry took a bite of his food and a sip of his drink and didn’t drop dead, he had a bit of hope,-So, tell me about the time you were here before,-Harry asked, hoping to distract Draco with a conversation.</p>
<p>-I think I was nine. Maybe ten,-Draco started, trying the pizza. It wasn’t…bad. It was actually pretty okay, but Malfoy wouldn’t admit it,-We came to visit my grandparents. I don’t remember much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               The conversation went slowly from that note and Harry already regretted asking about his family. Draco was deep in his thoughts, and judging by his face, they weren’t light and happy. But! He seemed to have liked the pizza. The coke remained untouched though and from time to time Draco looked at the glass of black sparkling liquid with doubt and suspect in his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Just try it!-Harry exclaimed,-I’m not trying to poison you, I’ve had every chance to kill you today.</p>
<p>-Who knows what you are capable of?-Draco raised his glass, and instead of taking a small sip, as Harry expected he would, he gulped a large amount of coke and almost started chocking.</p>
<p>-It’s attacking me! It’s attacking my nose!-his eyes were teary, he reached for a napkin, knocking over the bottle. With a quick spell (non-verbal and wandless) Harry got rid of the mess and handed napkins to Draco, who was assured in his soon death.</p>
<p>-It’s not attacking you!,-Harry honestly tried not to laugh. He did his best to, mostly because he knew how furious Draco would be if Harry laughed at him. But in the end, Potter doubted anyone would be able to hold in a laugh seeing what he saw, and he chuckled, even under Draco’s angry glance, he just couldn’t hep it.</p>
<p>-What’s in this thing?-Draco coughed and in time, calmed down. He started reading the bottle, but understood less than a half of the words,-Is there some spell?</p>
<p>-What spell? It’s muggle.</p>
<p>-It’s horrible! How do they even make it?</p>
<p>-I…I don’t know…but it’s totally safe, everyone drinks it,-Harry said, drinking half of his glass to show how right he was.</p>
<p>-You don’t even know how they make it?-Draco asked. Harry nodded, not seeing any problem about it,-You are adorably trusting to muggles and what they…create.</p>
<p>-Maybe,-Harry said, leaning back in his chair,-But you just called me adorable,-Harry didn’t manage to hold in a small smirk.</p>
<p>-I…you focus on the wrong part,-Malfoy replied, but a slight blush on his cheeks gave him away.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry and Draco would be glad to stay downstairs for longer and talk – and Draco still hoped for that tour – but it was too late and they were too tired. Harry gave Draco one of the other bedrooms on the second floor - Potter himself was only two doors away - handed him a change of clothes and with clean conscience went to sleep. He fell asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow, that’s how tired he was. Draco felt just as exhausted, but sleep didn’t come to him for a while. He laid sleepless for hours, thinking about things he normally wouldn’t allow himself to think about, going back to the memories he normally wouldn’t even have. And he did all that in Potter’s clothes; trousers were a little too short and only reached the middle of his ankles, but an oversized black t-shirt (muggle, but weirdly soft), felt like a hug. And maybe it was an illusion of sleep-deprived brain, but Draco could have sworn it kind of smelled like Potter.</p>
<p>               At 3 am Draco gave up. He got himself out of the bed, and trying to be as quiet as possible headed downstairs to get a glass of water. And no, he didn’t forget the Aguamenti Spell, he just didn’t feel like using it. If he was walking around in muggle clothes, eating muggle food, he might a well go to get a drink in a muggle way.</p>
<p>               Draco was standing in a dark kitchen, with no light at all, not even from his wand, when he heard noise from downstairs. Harry Potter, the savior of the Wizarding Britain, the legend, the boy who lived, showed up lighting his way with his wand in one hand and a hanger in another.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Oh, God, it’s you,-he sighed with relief and put his dangerous weapon down.</p>
<p>-Who else would it be?-Draco asked,-And what you were going to do with that?-he pointed at the hanger and laughed.</p>
<p>-I…I just grabbed the first thing I saw,-he mumbled,-What are you doing?</p>
<p>-Nothing. Go back to sleep,-Harry still pointed his wand at Draco and thanks to the bright lumos light he could see him, his whole body. And for a second, it kind of astounded him. Draco hadn’t actually worn short sleeves in more than two years, and he wouldn’t do it now too, if he had an alternative. The lack of sleeves revealed all Draco wanted to hide. The Mark, first and foremost. The scars from Sectumsempra that grew all over his body like spiderweb and the closer they were to his chest, the thicker and brighter they were. More other scars on his arms, those that had already started fading away. More short scars – more like cuts -  on the Mark. Harry wanted to stop looking, but couldn’t.</p>
<p>               Draco noticed it and carefully hid his left arm behind his back. That move woke Harry up. With blushing face he lowered the wand and cleared his throat.</p>
<p>-I…So everything is okay?-he asked.</p>
<p>-Yes,-Draco answered, but his voice wasn’t nearly as relaxed as it was when he was making fun of Harry for bringing a hanger as a weapon. Harry wanted to say something. Something to convince him that it didn’t matter, the Mark didn’t matter anymore and it didn’t really mean anything now. And that after all this time Harry had spent getting to know Draco, becoming his friend even, he found out enough to be able to see behind the “front” Malfoy had. Maybe that was their problem this whole time. Draco build a wall, created a whole other person and his true self behind it, and Harry didn’t care enough to knock it down. But he just stood there, silent.</p>
<p>-Okay. Good night,-Draco nodded and after another second full of doubts, Harry turned around and went upstairs.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So this is probably my favorite part of this fic. Hope you like it too.<br/>I don't know what else to say, thank you for reading and please leave a comment!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>               Draco had three solid hours of sleep that night. He didn’t have any dreams, just enjoyed the silence and peace of the night, and this rare opportunity to sleep all alone in the room; no snoring dormmates, no early birds who woke up at 6 am and made sure everyone was aware of that. Just harmony and bliss. That was cruelly interrupted by loud poundings on the door.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Draco!-Harry kept knocking even after Draco ignored him,-We’re gonna be late!-Malfoy didn’t react. The world could end, for all her cared. He really wanted to stay asleep. But Harry didn’t approve of it and kept pounding and pounding, until the last bits of sleep left Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Knock on your head, Potter-Draco opened the door so quickly that Harry’s fist was left hanging in the air. At first Potter froze, but then put his fist down and smiled.</p>
<p>-Good morning,-Draco rolled his eyes and walked past him.</p>
<p>-I pity the poor soul who will have to live with you,-he mumbled and headed to the bathroom.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry dressed up and waited for Draco in the kitchen. They agreed to head out to the orphanage at 7 am, but it was already half past seven and Draco still was in the bathroom. Harry spent considerable amount of time thinking about the last night incident before falling asleep; he was afraid Draco would be mad at him, offended possibly. But, to be honest, it was almost impossible to say if Malfoy was being rude to him because of yesterday, or because that’s just the way it was. Harry liked the second option more. Still, some share of awkwardness existed, and he didn’t like it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Hey,-Draco came downstairs, already dressed, but his hair was slightly wed and rosy cheeks made him look a little more alive, not so zombie-like,-We’re late.</p>
<p>-Yeah and who’s fault is that?-Draco mumbled “whatever” and sat down on one of the chairs. Harry was standing beside the fridge. A still empty fridge.</p>
<p>-So there’s nothing for breakfast,-he said, opening it just to see the same picture like yesterday,-Except for yesterday’s pizza.</p>
<p>-I’m good,-Draco said, yawning.</p>
<p>-Coffee, then?-Malfoy nodded and laid his head down. His hair covered the table like snow covers the lawn. He closed his eyes, but knew that no sleep would come now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry silently prepared two cups of coffee and put one in front of Draco. The sound of cup touching the surface woke him up, along with the smell of it. Draco wiped his eyes, looked at Harry and wondered how he managed to look be this chipper.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Did you even sleep last night?-Harry asked.</p>
<p>-Yeah,-Draco buried his face in the cup, tasting the bittersweet drink and inhaling the smell. He waited for coffee to do its special magic, but it almost never worked on him.</p>
<p>-Doesn’t look like it,-Draco shrugged and Harry didn’t make other attempts to get him to talk. They just finished their coffee in silence; Harry washed the cups (muggle way, under Draco’s shocked glance) and they walked out into the cold of December.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>                The boys didn’t have any time to admire the beauty of the beginning of winter and with a clap, apparated to another side of London. Draco was visibly nervous being this late, but when they heard a loud, desperate cry coming from the orphanage, Harry shared his concern.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Draco! For heaven’s sake!- Madam Polkinghorne was holding a crying girl and ran towards Draco as soon as she saw him. Analise pushed the girl into his arms, cursing him for being late, but Harry didn’t hear anything except for girl’s cries and only after Draco wrapped his arms around her tiny body, Potter recognized angelic Lucy in her red twisted face.</p>
<p>-Lucy, what happened?-Draco wiped her cheeks and tried to look into her eyes, but the girl just refused to react.</p>
<p>-She’s been crying the whole bloody morning!- Madam Polkinghorne was clearly disappointed in Lucy’s behavior and threw strict glances at her.</p>
<p>-But why?-Harry dared to ask, though he was pretty much terrified of the whole situation.</p>
<p>-Him, of course!-she said, nodding at Draco,-How many times have I asked you not to be late?-she asked and then turned to Harry,-Poor Lucy always takes it personally, she thinks he had abandoned her.</p>
<p>-Oh,-the girl already calmed down, more or less, and now was lying in Draco’s arms as he stroked her back and whispered apologies.</p>
<p>-She’s too bloody spoiled!- Madam Polkinghorne said, making sure Lucy heard her,-She is a complete nightmare on the weekdays.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Draco apologized about being late again and finally took Lucy to the other children, to canteen, leaving Madam Polkinghorne complaining. Lucy didn’t want to sit with them and or participate in any conversations. Instead, she chose to stay with Draco and Harry. With time her morning hysteria wore off and she was happy and talkative again, asking them about what they did yesterday and absolutely ignoring any other kids. Harry could assume that she was still a little upset and felt safer next to “adults”, but since the same situation happened yesterday, he started seeing a pattern there. And it concerned him.</p>
<p>               She physically didn’t let go of Malfoy till the end of the day. Even when he had to go to the bathroom, she started crying and asking to take her with him. And what at first seemed cute, now was worrying. Harry had no idea how Madam Polkinghorne handles Lucy on the weekdays, when Draco is at Hogwarts. And how Draco just walks by his day, knowing that this girl here probably thinks that he had betrayed her.</p>
<p>               The whole day all three were terrified of the moment to say goodbye. Lucy stayed awake though it was past her bedtime and her eyes were basically closing by themselves. She knew Draco couldn’t stay, but her brain just couldn’t make its peace with that. If he loves her, why does he leave every time?</p>
<p>-Draco,- Madam Polkinghorne was standing at the doors to the children’s room while Draco and Harry were reading a bedtime story for Lucy,-It’s late,-she whispered. And it was, 10.30 pm, at least, and they still had homework due tomorrow morning. Draco looked at Lucy, who’s eyes started filling up with tears already,-Lucy, you can see our guests out if you promise not to cry afterwards,-Analise said, fully aware that she will cry anyway. But Lucy nodded and jumped off the bed. Holding her little hand, Draco walked down the hall towards the exit, Harry went right behind them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-You promised not to cry,-Draco kneeled in front of Lucy and wiped her cheeks. She wasn’t sobbing yet, tears just silently fell down.</p>
<p>-I’m sorry.</p>
<p>-It’s okay,-Draco hugged her and closed his eyes,-See you next Saturday, right?</p>
<p>-Why can’t you come sooner? It’s so boring without you.</p>
<p>-I have school,-he said, pulling away from her,-I hate it too,-Lucy smiled through her tears,-And you need to have friends of your age, okay?-Harry could tell Lucy had heard that phrase a thousand times before.</p>
<p>-They’re all stupid.</p>
<p>-No, they are not.</p>
<p>-But you said you also didn’t have any friends. And I want to be friends only with you!-Lucy was very close to breaking down. All Draco meant by his words was that she didn’t have to be lonely all week, waiting for him; but all she heard was that he wanted to get rid of her.</p>
<p>-Okay, Okay!-he hugged her again,-I’ll always be your friend. Even if you have a thousand other friends, okay?</p>
<p>-I won’t,-she said and added,-When your school is over, will you take me away with you?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Lucy had asked that question before. Only once. Draco tried to distract her then and didn’t answer it. Of course, he didn’t want her to grow up in this place, but her chances for adoption were rather small – people tend to go for younger children – and Draco himself had so many problems to go through, not to mention his reputation. There was only so much he could do to help her and chances are, nothing wasn’t going to change. And now, she asked him again and he still didn’t have an answer she wanted.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-My school won’t be over for a very long time, Lucy,-he said, knowing too well it wasn’t good enough of an excuse to her.</p>
<p>-But I can wait! You just have to promise you won’t leave me here,-she was getting more upset with every second. Analise’s eyes got teary too.</p>
<p>-But can you? You are rather impatient, young lady,-Draco tried to make a joke, but it didn’t work.</p>
<p>-Do you promise? Draco?-she asked again. And again. Draco looked at Harry and at Madam Polkinghorne, looking for help, but what could they say? Harry felt especially helpless.</p>
<p>-Lucy, you will discuss it with Draco later. Right, Draco?-Madam Polkinghorne said. Lucy just kept starring at Draco with her huge teary eyes and asking her question. Harry physically felt his heart being torn to pieces.</p>
<p>Analise tried to pick her up, and only third attempt was successful – Lucy fought back with all she had. She started sobbing again and calling for Malfoy.</p>
<p>-Lucy, I’m sorry!-Draco cried as Analise took her away. His eyes were red too, lips trembling. He held himself back from running after her, holding her close and just taking her away, no matter circumstances.</p>
<p>-Draco, go! It’s okay!- Madam Polkinghorne said as she managed to drag her into the bedroom. Even when the door closed, Harry and Draco still heard her gut-wrenching cries. For a second Draco stood there and then stormed out of the building so quickly that Harry didn’t even get to react.</p>
<p>The first snow of the year covered their heads the second they got outside. Draco was standing a little farther from the orphanage and steam coming out of his mouth let Harry see how quickly he was breathing.</p>
<p>-Draco?-Harry carefully approached him and reached out to put his hand on his shoulders, but Draco quickly turned around and Harry’s hand just hanged in the air.</p>
<p>-Yes?-his eyes were red, so was almost his whole face. Cold, or tears, Harry couldn’t tell. Probably both.</p>
<p>-Are you okay?</p>
<p>-Yes,-Draco said. He wasn’t. And Harry didn’t know how to comfort him,-I…I’ll see you in school,-he said and disappeared – apparated. One second he was there, and another he wasn’t. Harry followed his example in a moment, but Draco was already on his way to Hogwarts when Harry appeared in Hogsmeade. They walked into the castle almost at the same time; Draco wasn’t crying anymore, but he didn’t look like he was eager to talk too.</p>
<p>-Draco, wait,-Harry finally found courage to talk to him, as they were about to enter the common room.</p>
<p>-I told you, everything is okay.</p>
<p>-No, it’s not. Even I can see how messed up everything is,-he sighed,- But…you shouldn’t feel bad. You are already doing your best to help that girl,-Draco shook his head.</p>
<p>-It’s not enough.</p>
<p>-In 5 years she’ll go to Hogwarts and…</p>
<p>-5 years is a lot of time!-Draco cut him off,-And even then, coming back there every summer? She is unhappy there!</p>
<p>-Maybe someone will adopt her.</p>
<p>-No one wants her,-Draco said, doomily,-Everyone wants little babies they can pretend were theirs from the start. No one wants an already formed child with her own temper,-Draco sighed,-I know I can’t do much. They wouldn’t give her to me even if I tried. It’s just…</p>
<p>-I know,-Harry took his hand. A bold move that Harry felt was necessary now,-But…It will get better for her, eventually. As an orphan myself, I can say that,-Potter smiled, hoping to get a smile from Draco. And he did. A small one with Malfoy’s eyes glued to the ground, but it was still a smile,-Also, she is very lucky to have a friend now. One friend can change more than you think.</p>
<p>-Yeah,-Draco looked at him. He knew exactly what Harry was talking about,-Hope you’re right. And…Thank you. For going with me and all.</p>
<p>-Sure,-Harry replied,-It was…nice. Because it was with you,-Draco, who claimed to never blush - because only idiots who can’t hide their emotions and wear their hearts on their sleeves blush - blushed so desperately that his cheeks were actually hot. Harry just smiled again and said a password (Meliora, Latin). The door opened and Draco walked into the common room first.</p>
<p>               Ron and Hermione were sitting on the couch. Weasley was half asleep with his head on Hermione’s lap, while Granger was writing something.</p>
<p>-You’re here!-she exclaimed as she saw Draco and Harry, waking up Ron,-How did it go?-Harry look at Draco, hoping he would answer.</p>
<p>-Good. I’m going to sleep,-he said and stormed to the dorm.</p>
<p>-Good night!-Harry said to him before he could disappear behind the door. Draco looked at him with that stupid and adorable expression he had every time Potter said something nice to him. He smiled, nodded and closed the door behind himself.</p>
<p>-How very eloquent,-Ron commented,-So, how did it actually go?-he asked Harry. Potter sat down with them and thought about everything that happened throughout last two days. Every interaction Draco had with Lucy, and all the other children; how he was the only one who could get her to stop crying; how even Sirius’s mom, who hated absolutely every human who ever walked the earth, liked him; how they ate pizza together and Draco was assured that a muggle drink wanted to kill him; how soft and vulnerable he looked all alone in Harry’s kitchen wearing his pajamas; how cute he looked after just waking up, even though he was very, very grumpy; how he cried when Lucy didn’t want to let him go; and how desperately he wanted to help her. Help all of them.</p>
<p>-I’m just gonna say that we really had no idea who Malfoy actually was. Ever.</p>
<p>Ron and Hermione exchanged glances.</p>
<p>-What is that supposed to mean?-Ron asked.</p>
<p>-It’s…I’ll explain later. I’m really tired and I have homework,-Harry got up. He imagined himself writing an essay now, after two long days and one very short night, and wanted to cry.</p>
<p>-You don’t,-Hermione sighed and handed him paper she had been writing,-I had nothing to do,-Harry took the paper and read the title. His essay. With his name on it. Written better than he could ever dream to write.</p>
<p>-Hermione…,-he looked at her. Granger smiled,-You are…you are something else, honestly,-he hugged her and kissed her cheek.</p>
<p>-That’s enough,-Ron pushed laughing Harry off of her.</p>
<p>-Thank you! I owe you one!</p>
<p>-If that only meant anything,-Hermione said but Harry was already on his way to the dorm and didn’t hear her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               Harry woke up happier than usual that day. He walked to the Great Hall confident to get the highest mark on his assignment; he already had a date for the ball, which protected him from girls’ attacks; and though he caught people whispering and starring at him, he was kind of used to it already.</p>
<p>               Once the smell of delicious dishes Hogwarts offered for breakfast reached Harry’s nose, he smiled even brighter and walked to his table. Hermione was discussing something with Draco, who already took his seat next to Harry’s empty one.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Morning,-friends greeted each other and continued breakfast. Mondays are rarely good, but this one – despite endless classes from Hogwarts’s most boring teachers – promised to be at least tolerable. It was also mail day, which explained a feather in Harry’s juice.</p>
<p>-Hey, it’s Pig!-Ron exclaimed as a small bird approached him. Weasley took a carefully folded letter from him and Hermione started stroking the bird, which made it purr happily.</p>
<p>-Who is it from?-Harry asked</p>
<p>-My mom,-Ron replied without a sight of a smile,-She says hi.</p>
<p>-Is everything okay?-Hermione asked, putting her hand on Ron’s shoulder.</p>
<p>-She says so,-Ron sighed,-She is all alone now; Dad is basically living at work. I hate how lonely she must be,-Hermione kept stroking his arm, as no words could really comfort Ron now. Molly went through something unimaginable; her biggest fear coming true. And now she had to live with it, thinking about it, thinking about him all day, all alone.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               The tone of the day changed over a second. They didn’t even notice how Draco received a letter too, and started reading it. Harry kept thinking of ways he could help Molly, the woman who was kind enough to always be there for him, to treat him like her own son, to be the mother he had lost.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-RON!-Harry exclaimed way too loudly, when the idea struck him. He gasped and grabbed his arm, scaring Hermione and everyone who heard them</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-I have an idea!-Harry tried to think of a proper way to express his thoughts, and while he was doing that (which always took him a while), Draco jumped off his seat. Dozens of heads turned to him, but Malfoy was starring at the letter in his hands.</p>
<p>-What’s wrong?-Harry asked, already forgetting the idea he had.</p>
<p>-Nothing…I gotta go,-he stormed off, heading for the stairs. Harry watched him go and then looked at Ron and Hermione.</p>
<p>-What was that?</p>
<p>-I’d say his casual dramatic walk?-Ron suggested. Hermione smirked, but shook his head.</p>
<p>-He looked upset.</p>
<p>-Paying an awful lot of attention to Malfoy, I see,-Ron said to her. Hermione smiled and knocked Weasley’s shoulder with hers,-Go follow him already, you were going to do it anyway,-he told Harry.</p>
<p>-I wasn’t…,-Harry said, but looked at the exit. Draco did look upset.</p>
<p>-Just go. Check on him at least,-Ron said. Harry nodded and took off.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>               He found Draco in the first place he had checked. Their dorm. Malfoy was standing by the window, squeezing a piece of paper in his hands. Harry carefully closed the door behind him, but it still made noise that Draco heard.</p>
<p>               For some unknown to him reason Harry expected to see Draco crying. He assumed it was a bad news type of letter, maybe even from Azkaban. But his eyes were neither red nor teary. Malfoy looked…lost. Disoriented</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-Is everything okay?-Draco nodded,-Are you sure?-another nod and he turned back to the window,-Who is that letter from?</p>
<p>-Who can it be from?-his mother, of course. Harry saw Draco’s tendency to get upset after talking to his mother.</p>
<p>-What did she say?-Harry approached him,-Draco?</p>
<p>-Read it, if you want,-Malfoy basically threw a crumpled letter to Harry.</p>
<p>-Can I?</p>
<p>-I’m giving it to you. It doesn’t really matter though,-Draco whispered and sat down on his bed. He hid his face in his hands. Harry was scared to read what he was holding, what upset – or even shocked – Draco so much.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>“Dear son,</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I’ve heard about your success on Quidditch game a few weeks ago. I am very proud of you. I’m glad you are trying to enjoy yourself, though I know how hard it is for you there.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>               Draco, I want you to know that all this time, ever since I had to leave Britain, I have been doing my absolute best to take you away with myself. My heart broke when I had to leave you. The only thing that comforted me was knowing that you were safe in the walls of Hogwarts, but you deserve more than that, after everything you had been through. You deserve to be happy, Draco, and I know you can’t find happiness at Hogwarts. Neither could I, at my time.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>               But I am so glad to tell you that you won’t have to go back there anymore. I have finally got all the things I needed in order, found a flat and talked to Madam Maxime. You can come to France with me, Draco. After the Ball that you are having this December (by the way, I expect you to tell me who your date is), I will take you away straight to Paris. You will have an interview shortly, but Madam Maxine had already expressed her wish to see you among Beauxbatons Academy students. I am so sorry that you had to wait so long, but good things are worth waiting for, aren’t they?</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>               I wasn’t sure if I should say it in a letter, or wait till we see each other, but I was afraid that people may start talking and you would hear it from someone else. I’d rather you hear it from me. Good things aren’t just worth waiting for, they are worth some sacrifice. And I had to make a sacrifice to ensure a good future for you, for us. It goes beyond us moving to France, it was something that I had to do for long term. Draco, I had to sell the Manor. The deal isn’t done yet, but I have found the buyer and he will transfer the money and sign the papers by this April. I know you are upset now. And I am very sorry you feel this way. But you need to understand – it is for the best. That place would have done nothing good for us. It is time to let go, to move on, to start a new life. And now we both have this opportunity. No one in France cares about what we did, or what we didn’t do. No one cares about our reputation, no one will bully you. I know you loved The Manor, but I love you more. And I value your happiness, your health and your safety more than a ruined house. I’m sorry.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Love, Mom”</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>-You read awfully slowly,-Draco said when Harry finally lowered the letter. He was speechless and at the same time had so much to say,-Can you believe it?-Harry couldn’t,-She is selling it. Selling the manor. My home!-Draco finally expressed some emotion. Mostly anger.</p>
<p>-Draco…,-Harry’s voice turned out dry and weak, but Potter was just shocked by what he had read that could hardly speak. It was like a storm. Unexpected, strong, destroying.</p>
<p>-She just wants to get rid of it. As if it doesn’t mean anything to anyone. This manor was in my father’s family for centuries! It has history! She can’t just give it to some rich idiot!</p>
<p>-Draco…</p>
<p>-And she’s not even sorry about it. “I’m sorry if you’re upset”, of course I am upset!-Malfoy was getting angrier with every second. He got up and started walking around the room, throwing hands and almost yelling,-Isn’t it just awfully selfish? Selling the manor, pretending nothing ever happened? What will father thing when he finds out? He’ll call me a traitor!</p>
<p>-Draco!-Harry called for his attention.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-Are you leaving?-he asked. Malfoy just froze for a second. He opened his mouth to say something and closed it again,-Are you? Letting her take you away?</p>
<p>-I…I don’t know,-they were standing opposite to each other. Draco already had angry tears on his eyes, and Harry wanted to cry too, but not for the Manor.</p>
<p>-Do you want it? She thinks that you want it,-he raised the letter.</p>
<p>-I…I did want it. When the year just started,-Draco sighed,-I used to ask for to take me away.</p>
<p>-But you don’t now, right?-Draco shrugged. But it meant yes,-You have to tell her! You can’t just leave now!</p>
<p>-If not now, then later,-Draco sat down again,-If she sells it, I won’t have anywhere to go. My home will be gone and I’ll have to go with her. No matter what I want,-Draco looked down and Harry sat next to him.</p>
<p>-That’s not true, you know?-he touched him with his shoulder.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-You have somewhere to go. Even if the Manor is gone,-Draco looked into Harry’s eyes, searching for an answer there, but Potter just kept his sly smile and waited for Malfoy to get it himself.</p>
<p>-Are you trying to be funny?</p>
<p>-You know, when I had nowhere to go and would rather die on the streets than go back to my aunt and uncle’s, Ron’s family let me stay with them,-Harry said, ignoring Draco’s question.</p>
<p>-That’s sweet. I’m sure Weasley family would open their doors for me with no question now.</p>
<p>-Not them, you idiot,-Harry said. Draco still didn’t get it. Or pretended not to,-You saw that my house is too big for me alone…</p>
<p>-Shut up,-Draco cut off before Harry even finished his sentence.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-Just shut up,-he said,-You don’t mean it.</p>
<p>-But I do,-he said, and moved slightly closer to be able to look into his face,-I’m just saying that if you need it, my doors are open for you and you can stay. As long as you need,-Draco shook his head,-It’s only a big deal, if you make it a big deal.</p>
<p>-You don’t have to do that.</p>
<p>-So?-Harry sighed and touched Draco’s face, making him look at him. The move made both their hearts sink, but Harry wanted to seem decisive and determined,-You are not alone, Draco. Everything is going to be okay,-Harry smiled. He still was holding his face. Draco looked at him, surprised and embarrassed.</p>
<p>-You are such a cliché,-he said after a pause. Harry burst out laughing and let go of him.</p>
<p>-Really? Well, you are SO dramatic, I can’t even begin to describe!-they both were laughing now, talking over each other,-You should have seen your face, really.</p>
<p>-You are the one to talk, Potter,-boys kept laughing, until Draco suddenly got serious again,-You are a cliché,-he repeated,-But…thank you.</p>
<p>-Shut up,-Harry smiled,-Write to your mother now. Tell her you’ll stay and you’ll figure everything out.</p>
<p>-Okay. Thanks,-they looked at each other with smiles on their lips, and Harry thought about hugging Draco – it did seem appropriate, considering he had just offered him to move in with him – but it also felt awkward. Draco thought about the same thing. And while they were thinking – not doing – the door to the dorm opened, and Ron and Hermione walked in.</p>
<p>-You guys okay?-Ron asked. All three were looking at Malfoy, who nodded at the question.</p>
<p>-We are now,-Harry said for him.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ron Weasley wasn’t as oblivious and blind as people thought he was. Sometimes he just chose not to notice certain things, either for his own comfort, or for comfort of other people. Sometimes he noticed everything, but didn’t act on it. Sometimes he noticed more than anyone else did. And when Harry casually mentioned to him and Hermione who his date for the ball was – casually, but with terror in his eyes – Ron reacted the way Harry would expect him too; shock, a bit of disgust, a lot of mistrust. But inside, he admitted that it was a perfectly expectable turn of events.</p><p>               Ron actually had his own issues to focus on. He saw this Ball as his chance to “redeem” himself in a few different spheres. First of all, fashion-vise. Ron still had nightmares concerning those robes he had to wear on Yule Ball in 4<sup>th</sup> year – in most of them the robes turned out to be living and very hungry creatures and ended up swallowing Ron whole.</p><p>And secondly, his date. Looking back, Weasley couldn’t believe he used to be THAT blind and stupid not to invite Hermione right away and to later give her a hard time because of his own mistake. Ron decided to make up for that too.</p><p>A week before the ball, he grabbed Harry and took him to Diagon Alley to get himself the best tux – tux, not robes – they could possibly find and come up with the most romantic way to ask Hermione to the Ball.</p><p>-Why do you even need to ask her?-Harry wondered, going through endless shirts and trousers offered at the stores. They declined the help of the saleswoman and decided to find everything themselves,-If you’re already dating. She wouldn’t go with anyone else, would she?</p><p>-Yes, but…I want to,-Ron said, blushing so hard that his freckles disappeared,-I want it to be sweet and romantic and all.</p><p>-Then you have the wrong person,-Harry smirked,-Try these on,-he handed Ron the first tux they saw as they came in. Weasley took it and disappeared behind the curtain of changing room.</p><p>-I know, but you’re all that I have, so start thinking.</p><p>-I never properly invited anyone anywhere, I have no idea what people do in such situations.</p><p>-Yet you do have a date,-Ron said and sighed,-Find something black, I don’t like this one,-he asked.</p><p>-Black? Shirt too?</p><p>-Not the shirt, I’m not going to the funeral, am I?-Harry rolled his eyes and went back into the store. He actually did have to find something for himself too, but he’d rather be alone while doing it. Especially if Ron was going to point out “his date” every 5 minutes. Potter had already made it clear that him going to the Ball with Draco was more of a joke, and they were going as friends.</p><p>-There,-Harry went with the safest option and gave Ron the most classic black tux with a black tie. Ron quickly tried it on and opened the curtain, piercing Harry with very unsatisfied glance.</p><p>-Seriously?-he asked.</p><p>-What?-Harry didn’t see what was wrong in Ron’s outfit. In his opinion, he looked great.</p><p>-I look like a waiter!-Harry looked closer and couldn’t hold in a laugh. Now that Ron pointed it out…</p><p>-I’m sorry! Sorry!-Harry was now full on laughing</p><p>-You are useless. i should have asked Malfoy,-Ron mumbled and went looking himself. Harry followed him. They spent another two hours searching, trying on, laughing and arguing. Harry approved of every option Ron tried, even the worst ones, and in an hour Ron stopped asking him. He settled on a velvet black tuxedo with a black bow-tie. Harry accidently mentioned that he looked like James Bond and had to explain that IT WAS A COMPLIMENT RON HE IS A VERY GOOD-LOOKING SPY RELAX.</p><p>-Finally!-Ron exclaimed when he paid for his tux and was free to go back to school. Already relaxed but still very tired he opened the door and almost left the store when…,-Wait!-he shut the door right before Harry’s nose,-What are you wearing?</p><p>-I…ugh, I don’t know. I probably have something,-Harry mumbled.</p><p>-Something? No,-Ron dragged him by his hand back into the store. The saleswoman smiled, but inside she was counting minutes until the end of her shift.</p><p>-I don’t want to try anything on, let’s just buy something and go,-Harry whined.</p><p>-Sure, if you’re such a billionaire to buy clothes that won’t fit,-Ron said, searching through the same suits they just examined. Harry looked around in discomfort</p><p>-I don’t have anyone to impress.</p><p>-Yeah, right,-Ron smirked.</p><p>-What is that supposed to mean?</p><p>-Whatever you want it to mean, mate,-he said with a smile and handed him something soft and dark blue.</p><p>-I want a black one too.</p><p>-Try this one first,-Ron had to physically push Harry into the changing room – Harry kept whining and bickering,-Even if you don’t want to impress anyone,-Ron started as Harry was changing,-Where’s your competitive spirit? Malfoy’s gonna be all dressed up, you gotta beat him.</p><p>-He won’t be dressed up,-Harry said, opening up the curtain. The suit was too big for him, but the color looked pretty great.</p><p>-Wait a second,-Ron came back with another dark-blue suit, but this time it looked a little more luxurious. And costed more.</p><p>-Why can’t I just have a black one?</p><p>-Shut up and put it on,-Harry groaned.</p><p>-Since when do you even care about clothes, and looking good, and…and impressing someone?-Harry asked.</p><p>-Since I found someone to impress?-Ron said, shyly. For a second Harry froze. It sounded so…not like him. But at the same time, very like him. Harry’s thoughts got messed up and irrational fear occupied half of them. Fear of Merlin knows what; of time that runs so fast that even his irresponsible friend Ron is ready to settle down, of still desperately unclear future, of the ball itself that is a week away and realization of who he was going there with still paralyzed him from time to time. And that “who” was actually the scariest part of all terrifying scenarios Harry had in his head.</p><p>-Mate? You’re done?-Ron woke Harry up from his thoughts. He quickly got dressed and went out to let Weasley see the suit</p><p>-So?</p><p>-It’s the one,-Ron didn’t add anything. But he looked so confident in his words that he didn’t have to.</p><p>-What?</p><p>-Look!-Ron pointed him at the mirror,-It’s the one! You should get it!-Harry almost didn’t recognize himself in the mirror. Though it wasn’t a complete look – he probably will have to do something with his hair – even now, he looked so different. In a good way. Not like a shy confused kid who never knew where he actually belonged and wore hand-me-down clothes that never fit. He looked mature, organized, confident. But at the same time, the tux didn’t destroy Harry’s personality – he still looked like himself. He smiled. It was the one.</p><p>               Harry didn’t feel bad spending so much money on clothes. It was one of the first pieces of clothing he bought for himself, by himself because he wanted it. And he was glad that exactly that suit happened to be his (almost) first purchase. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>               Now, an hour before the Ball was supposed to start, Harry looked back at the moment with a smile. He was standing in front of the mirror in the common room, while Hermione was trying to get a hold of his hair. Ron was half-asleep on the couch, already dressed and ready.</p><p>               Speaking of Ron! He did come up with the most amazing, romantic and loving way to invite Hermione to the Ball. He worked on it for so long and found something flawless. If he used it back in 4<sup>th</sup> year, even Fleur Delacour wouldn’t say no to him. When Harry heard about it, he almost teared up.</p><p> </p><p>               Unfortunately, Ron never got a chance to use it. On Wednesday, three days before the Ball, Hermione and Harry watched Ron training the team for the next Quidditch match. After they finished, she approached him and asked to go to the ball with her. Not really asked, she actually told him that they were going together. Ron looked so shocked that for a second Hermione thought he had other plans in mind. Harry just stood beside them and laughed.</p><p> </p><p>-I don’t think there’s anything else I can do..,-Hermione said, finally leaving Harry’s hair alone. They stood in front of the mirror, Harry completely dressed, while Hermione was still in her uniform. She touched his hair once again and looked at him, waiting for some feedback.</p><p>-Has anything changed?-Harry asked. Hermione groaned and threw a hairbrush at Ron who woke up immediately</p><p>-What? Is it time already?-he asked, jumping off the couch.</p><p>-It’s not. Look!-Hermione nodded at Harry. Ron wasn’t sure what exactly he was expected to do,-His hair!</p><p>-Oh, here’s the brush,-Ron handed it to Harry. Hermione looked at him with disbelief and probably some doubts regrading the reason why she started dating him,-What?</p><p>-Just…just wait here,-she sighed and walked in the girls’ dorm.</p><p>-What just happened?-Ron asked as Harry laughed and sat down next to him.</p><p>-I don’t even know,-Ron scoffed too, though he still had no idea what they were laughing about. There was still at least 40 minutes till the Ball, but surprisingly, Ron didn’t feel nervous at all. He was a little excited – as excited as you can be for lame school dances – but mostly calm. He wished he could say that about Harry though.</p><p>-Nervous?-he asked Harry after at least a minute of him starring at the door almost without blinking.</p><p>-Are you?</p><p>-Not really,-Ron leaned back on the couch,-But it’s okay if you are. Have you even seen Malfoy today?</p><p>-Yeah…but not after the classes,-another wave of anxiety covered Harry,-You don’t think he could…?</p><p>-No,-Ron shook his head with all seriousness he had,-He wouldn’t. Right? I mean…no, he wouldn’t.</p><p>-Yeah, he wouldn’t,-Harry said, unconvinced. Where could Malfoy even be now, 40 minutes before the ball? - It just came to me…,-Harry started, hoping to be cut off because the end of that thought was rather terrifying.</p><p>-What?</p><p>-We never talked about the ball. I mean, except for that one time,-saying it out loud made Harry realize that maybe they should have talked. Or Harry should have just mentioned it once, just to make sure. But it was an awkward thing to talk about and with all the classes Harry never found time…</p><p>-That doesn’t mean anything,-Ron replied,-Me and Mione also don’t talk about it much.</p><p>-You spent the whole dinner yesterday discussing the color of your bow tie,-Harry sighed. Now he was almost sure that Draco wouldn’t show up. And it upset him, but at the same time it was a relief. His nerves had been killing him for a week before the Ball, and maybe it would be for the best if he spends it with his friends. As a third wheel. Again.</p><p>Ron didn’t find any other comforting words and boys waited for Hermione in silence. The clock ticked and with pounding heart Harry looked at the door every time someone walked in and every time that someone wasn’t Draco. Sadness of possibly being stood up over-weighed the relief a thousand times.</p><p>-Wow,-Ron gasped as Hermione returned from the dorm. She wore a blue dress. It reminded Ron and Harry of their previous Ball, but was classier and more elegant. High heels and slight touch of make up made Hermione look not just like a pretty girl, but like a gorgeous young woman she was. Ron blushed so desperately as he saw her that his awkward attempts to compliment her weren’t necessary. She saw all he wanted to say in his eyes.</p><p>-Where’s your date?-Hermione asked Harry as they walked out of the common room and headed towards the Great Hall. Dozens of teenagers in robes and shiny dresses passed them.</p><p>-Not sure,-Harry mumbled. Ron and Hermione exchanged concerned looks and Ron raised his eyebrow, trying to make her understand what was going on.</p><p>-You know, if he doesn’t show up, we can still have fun together,-Ron said.</p><p>-Of course!-Hermione supported him. Harry nodded and tried to smile, but he knew that if Draco really doesn’t show up, Potter will go back to the dorm and leave the love birds alone.</p><p>-If who doesn’t show up?-the three of them heard a voice behind them. Harry immediately turned around to see Malfoy in an all-black suit, hands in his pockets, a smirk playing on his lips. Ron wouldn’t admit it, but he definitely regretted not buying a suit like his. And Harry had to make a physical effort not to let his jaw drop.</p><p>-What took you so long?-Ron said what Harry wanted, but wouldn’t ask.</p><p>-Technically I’m not late and I had some business to attend to,-Draco replied to him,-Ready?-he asked, looking at Harry now and reaching out his hand. Harry just starred at it for a second, not sure if he was supposed to take it or just follow him.</p><p>-Okay, then. Have a nice night,-Hermione said, dragging Ron away. Once they were far away enough, Harry stood beside Draco and together they headed towards the Great Hall. He knew that normally he was supposed to compliment Draco (and there was a lot to compliment), take his hand and start a lovely conversation, but nothing was normal about that night, not in his head. Harry was still insanely nervous and mostly looked at his own feet as they walked. Draco remained silent too, but at least he still looked proud and confident.</p><p>-Draco! Harry!-they heard a voice behind them. Both boys turned around and saw Luna Lovegood running towards them. She stopped to catch a breath and smiled,-Look at you! You both look great!</p><p>-Look at yourself!-Draco said through a smile,-Just…breathtaking,-she smiled. Her dress seemed to have been made of pure diamonds, as it sparkled and reflected the light from all the chandeliers and candles.</p><p>-Thank you. You know, I heard today was a special day,-she said. Draco smiled and nodded. Of course it was,-It’s a day of true love!</p><p>-Really?-he asked.</p><p>-Of course. Father wrote about it in the new Quibbler. That’s why we need to be extra careful with who we take to the Ball today. The choice may end up becoming very vital,-Draco seemed to be at loss of words and situation got rather uncomfortable  as Harry still didn’t say a single word and Luna just kept going on about true love. Thankfully, Ginny chimed in and distracted Luna. By kissing her.</p><p>-Hey, guys,-she said after a few very awkward for Harry seconds,-Looking good.</p><p>-Thanks,-Harry replied and wanted to compliment her back, but Ginny already wasn’t listening. Her attention was completely occupied by Luna. Her eyes sparkled, she smiled very differently. Harry couldn’t help but think that he had never seen her like this back when they were together. And through he was very happy for Ginny and didn’t want anything romantic with her, he still felt some weird kind of jealousy when he looked at them.</p><p>-See you inside!-Luna waved and together with Ginny walked into the Great Hall. Harry was sure people would stare at them. But Luna was used to that and wouldn’t care. And Ginny seemed too happy to care. But then he imagined how people would stare at him when he walks in with Malfoy and a wave of anxiety that came with that realization almost knocked him off his feet.</p><p>-Where’s that Gryffindor courage, Potter?-Draco asked as if he had read Harry’s mind. Neither of them rushed to get in, but neither of them wanted to make the other think as if they changed their mind.</p><p>-I…I…,-he took a deep breath. Right. He was supposed to be the brave one,-Right here. Ready?-he asked, looking up at Malfoy.</p><p>-Sure.</p><p>Together they stepped into the beautifully decorated hall. It was very crowded, but unlike all the scenarios Harry had imagined, no one looked at them. People were too busy dancing and talking to notice two boys who decided to come together. Even if one of them was the chosen one.</p><p>               They moved farther into the hall and through the party had already started, neither of them knew what they were supposed to do now. The music was too loud, the only table with alcohol (for 7<sup>th</sup> and 8<sup>th</sup> year only. McGonagall made a decision to allow adult drinks on the ball after she found out that kids managed to sneak them in anyway) was too far to reach. Harry just smiled and tried to look relaxed though sudden need to do to say at least something was eating him alive.</p><p>
  <em>Should I ask him to dance?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Does he even want to dance?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Do I even want to dance?</em>
</p><p>               First 40 minutes of the Ball passed in awkward attempts to start a conversation over loud music, absolutely no dancing and occasional weird stares. Still, Draco didn’t move from Harry’s side and looked pretty satisfied, which – as weird as it was – gave Harry some kind of hope. He really didn’t understand himself that night.</p><p>-Is that…?-Draco asked looking into the crowd. The music stopped, but over the chatter Harry still had difficulties hearing him.</p><p>-What?</p><p>-It can’t be,-Draco stormed away. He pushed his way through the crowd and Harry had nothing better to do than follow him. Draco, being a little (not a little) taller, could at least see where he was going; Potter, meanwhile, just tried to keep his eyes on Malfoy’s back while it kept getting farther and farther. They crossed half of the hall until Draco stopped and knocked on a shoulder of some girl who wasn’t even facing him.</p><p>-Parkinson!-the girl who turned out to be Pansy Parkinson looked at Draco with a gasp and immediately jumped into his arms. She chuckled as he hugged her, raising her from the ground. Draco too looked rather content. Way happier than with Harry.</p><p>-I’ve been looking for you for an hour now, asshole!-Pansy said once Draco put her down. She wore a short black dress that matched her dark lipstick. Together with Malfoy they looked pretty harmonious.</p><p>-What are you doing here?-Draco looked as if he couldn’t believe his eyes.</p><p>-McGonagall sent me a letter, said there was going to be a Ball, so here I am!</p><p>-Why didn’t you say you were coming?</p><p>-To see that face, of course!-she said and touched Draco’s nose. Draco smiled, allowing it which shocked Harry to his core,-So where’s the lucky bitch? Who are you taking? Greengrass?-she asked and looked around Draco. Harry was still standing a little aside – close enough to hear everything they said, but far enough to give them some privacy</p><p>-No, actually…,-Draco looked around too, trying to find his date. Harry approached them. It took Pansy a second to understand.</p><p>-Oh. Oh!- she gasped and smiled even brighter, - Finally! Potter! Together! Finally!</p><p>-No, no, no!-Draco rushed to correct her while blushing harder than Harry had ever seen,-As friends. Just as friends.</p><p>-Right…-Pansy was clearly entitled to her own opinion regrading the case,-Still a progress. Hey, Potter,-she nodded at him.</p><p>-Hey,-Harry replied but felt a strong urge to leave. These two had a lot to discuss – which they started already – and Harry didn’t want to disturb. He stayed though. And even during their conversation with Draco, Pansy kept throwing glances at Harry. Ones he couldn’t really understand.</p><p>-Okay, I’m bored,-Pansy said after at least 30 minutes of discussing everything she had missed about Hogwarts. Draco did omit some details, but still was particularly open with her,-Let’s go to the common room,-she asked Draco.</p><p>-Which common room?-Malfoy asked with a smirk.</p><p>-What do you mean? Ours. Slytherin.</p><p>-Oh, I’m not a Slytherin anymore,-Pansy gasped,-We’re all studying together now,-he nodded at Harry,-And we’re called…brace yourself…”8<sup>th</sup> year”!-Pansy laughed</p><p>-That sucks, really. But we still have to go to the dungeons. I have something down there.</p><p>-I don’t have a password, Pans</p><p>-We’ll figure something out. Come on!-she took Draco’s hands,-Let’s go! Potter can come too,-Draco looked at Harry. He shrugged.</p><p>-Fine,-for what seemed like a thousandth time in an hour, Pansy hugged Draco and together with Harry they left the Great Hall. Harry was more of a tag-along - he waked behind them and didn’t participate in any conversations. He wasn’t even sure why he went with them.</p><p>-Okay, what now?-Draco asked once they set foot in the dungeons. Pansy ordered them to stay near the stairs and looked into the dark hall. The door to the Slytherin common room was obviously locked and even ex-Slytherins couldn’t get in without a password.</p><p>-We’ll wait for someone,-Pansy said.</p><p>-Everyone is upstairs!</p><p>-Not everyone! Someone has to be too cool for lame school dances,-she said,-Come on…HA!-the door opened and a girl walked out,-Oh my god, that’s Astoria! We’re so lucky!-she looked at Draco who started shaking his head.</p><p>-I won’t do it,-he said right away.</p><p>-I’m not asking. You’re doing it,-she put her hands on his shoulders. Draco was about to resist, but Pansy shook her head and repeated,-You are doing it. Go.</p><p>Draco groaned, but quickly caught Astoria before she could reach the stairs. He smiled to her, but Harry couldn’t hear their conversation.</p><p>-What’s happening?-Harry’s curiosity defeated the lack of desire to talk to Pansy.</p><p>-That’s Astoria Greengrass,-she said, pointing at the girl,-Poor creature had been in love with your date for years.</p><p>-Really?</p><p>-Yeah,-Pansy smirked,-She even asked him to the Yule Ball back on 4<sup>th</sup> year. Draco had to lie that he already had a date and we went together,-Harry remembered the day he and Draco decided to go together. That explained Malfoy’s quick lie.</p><p>-He doesn’t like her?</p><p>-I think he is afraid of her,-Draco did look very uncomfortable. And getting a password out of her really took a while. After two more minutes Astoria finally set him free and run to the stairs. Harry and Pansy hid in the corner when she passed them, but still heard her happy chuckles</p><p>-Now that’s the Draco I know and love!-Pansy said when Astoria was far enough,-Did you get it?</p><p>-Yes, I got it and I hate you.</p><p>-Yeah, right. Open up!-Draco mumbled the password and the door opened. Slytherin common room was completely empty, not a soul except for them. Harry carefully walked in. He hardly remembered it since the last and only time he had been there, but now he really saw beauty in it. Soft light, dark colors everywhere, many and many bookshelves, a fireplace and…windows! Windows looked at the lake! Harry gasped when a big colorful fish swam past the window.</p><p>-Pretty, huh?-Pansy asked. She couldn’t stop smiling,-Sometimes mermaids come. That used to be a real show.</p><p>-Just take your thing and let’s go,-Draco said, still acting angry for what he was forced to do.</p><p>-Stop being so grumpy, you’ve missed this!-she said, raising her hands. Draco agreed, but didn’t plan to show it,-I’ll be right back,-Pansy disappeared in girls’ dorm, finally leaving Draco and Harry alone.</p><p>-It’s so different from ours. From all other common rooms,-Harry said using the opportunity to talk to Draco. Malfoy nodded, now looking very nostalgic and glad.</p><p>-You haven’t been here before, have you?-Draco asked, assured to get a negative answer,-The view is pretty fascinating, isn’t it?</p><p>-Yeah, but…,-for some reason Harry decided not to lie,-I have been here.</p><p>-Really?-Draco finally stopped studying the walls and looked at Harry,-When?</p><p>-Second year. I came to talk to someone.</p><p>-Who?-Draco’s curiosity was pure, he didn’t suspect anything bad</p><p>-You,-Harry had a weak smile that didn’t protect him from naïve childish confusion on Draco’s face.</p><p>-I would have remembered that.</p><p>-I was under Polyjuice potion. Me and Ron,-Harry admitted. Draco still didn’t get it.</p><p>-Why?-he started going through his memories of the second year and scoffed when he realized the reason 12 year old Potter had,-You thought I opened the Chamber of secrets,-Draco made a step away from Harry.</p><p>-Or that you knew who did it!-Harry rushed to compensate the distance, but Draco was already looking away and the whole mood changed completely,-We were just trying to get to the truth! And you kept acting as if you knew something!- Draco nodded, but Harry did like that reaction,-It was 6 years ago, you can’t possibly be mad at me for that now. Right?</p><p>-Right,-Draco agreed, but his face, his posture, his eyes, all contradicted his words,-Pans, are you done?-he raised his voice for Pansy to hear. Harry had never regretted not lying that much.</p><p>-Coming!-in a second Pansy slowly walked up to them with a cigarette between your lips and eyes closed from delight.</p><p>-Is this why we went down here? An old cigarette?-Draco asked, but he wasn’t mad. Not at her. Harry already started making up excuses and apologies for god knows what – he didn’t want the night to be ruined with a fight over nothing.</p><p>-Yes and no,-Pansy said,-I just miss this place. Can you believe that? I miss the school,- Draco smiled understandingly,-We hated it here! And now I miss it!</p><p>-Why didn’t you come back then?-Pansy immediately looked at Harry. Just for a second, but it was noticeable. And Harry realized that the truth wasn’t for his ears.</p><p>-I had a lot to do. Still have,-she said with a sad smile,-You also wouldn’t come back if you didn’t have to,-Draco shrugged. Harry ordered himself to stop taking things that hardly concerned him so personally. For a few more minutes they just stood there. Completely different thoughts crossing their minds. From time to time Pansy would say something, remind Draco of their collective memory or an inside joke, and Draco would laugh, or smile, or just nod sadly. Harry felt very, very out of place and weirdly lonely. And he still couldn’t tell why he didn’t just leave.</p><p>-Let’s go,-Pansy said after a while and took Draco’s hand. He followed her, not even looking at Harry. Potter couldn’t believe that something he had done 6 years ago could have such ridiculous but serious consequences. Couldn’t believe it was so important to Draco.</p><p> </p><p>Once they returned to the Great Hall, Harry left them alone. He stopped following Draco and instead went straight towards alcohol-table. Drinks turned into water if a minor touched them and Harry was damn glad he wasn’t one. He poured himself a drink and dried the glass in one try that burned his throat. And then another. He looked up at Draco still talking to Pansy and not even noticing that he was gone and poured another. Harry felt so much, but all his feelings were so utterly negative that they just blended into one desire to distract himself, to stop thinking. And even among the wizards, getting drunk was a way to do it.</p><p> </p><p>-Potter,-Harry turned around to Draco’s voice after 5<sup>th</sup>…or 6<sup>th</sup> glass. He wasn’t sure. But he definitely wasn’t feeling so much now.</p><p>-Hey,-he replied,-Where’s Pansy?</p><p>-She went to find Blaise. What are you doing?</p><p>-Nothing,-Harry said and raised another glass, though he didn’t want one anymore.</p><p>-I think you had enough,-Malfoy said, reaching for his glass, but Harry pulled away.</p><p>-I think that’s not your business,-he said, drinking the burning liquid. It really is called firewhiskey for a reason. Harry expected Draco to be gone once he’s done with the drink, but Malfoy didn’t move.</p><p>-Do you…-he started and sighed,-Do you want to dance?-Harry wasn’t sure if he heard him correctly.</p><p>-Dance?</p><p>-Isn’t it what people are supposed to do on the balls?</p><p>-Yes, but do you want it? With me?</p><p>-Yes,-Draco didn’t look away, didn’t stutter. And Harry immediately felt more sober. Malfoy offered him his hand and Harry took it. Together they paced into the center of the Hall, not even looking at other staring at him, not looking at anything but each other. And a slow song started. They danced carefully, still with considerable distance between each other, but as song progressed, both of them felt a little more relaxed.</p><p>-Listen,-Harry said because he risked losing his mind if he didn’t,-About the Polyjuice and everything..,</p><p>-Forget it,-Draco cut him off,-I’m not actually mad at you for what you did when you were 12,-Draco chuckled,-Everything was very different back then.</p><p>-Yeah. Yeah, it was,-Harry smiled. And stood slightly closer to Draco,-I also wanted to ask something,-Harry wasn’t sure if that was the Gryffindor’s courage that finally woke up in him, or alcohol, but once again, he just had to ask.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>-Did you and Pansy ever date?-Harry tried to sound casual and indifferent, but let’s just say that if he paid half as much attention to the classes as he did to Draco’s answer, Hermione would have a competitor.</p><p>-Me and Pansy? Merlin no!-he laughed,-Have you even seen her, she’s gay!</p><p>-What?-that wasn’t an answer Harry expected.</p><p>-Yeah. Very active and very open one. I’m shocked you didn’t know. She just asked me if Granger was “available”.</p><p>-Oh my god,-Harry laughed. He couldn’t wait to tell that to Hermione. Pansy’s sudden “coming out” really served as an ice-breaker. Harry’s nerves calmed down and he finally – finally – started enjoying the ball. Through at least 4 more songs they talk about every stupid prank they pulled on each other, every time one of them went an extra mile just to screw another over, about the Potter Stinks pins (Draco still considered them high comedy), about “that time you climbed a damn tree to bully me!” (Draco denied that ever happened) and all other endless cases of their stupidity.</p><p>-Do you want something? I’ll get us drinks,-Harry asked after another long laughing session. Though it was the end of December and even magic couldn’t get rid of the cold, with all the dancing and laughing Harry’s hair got wet from the sweat, his bow-tie got loose and his jackets was now on one of the chairs – where he’ll definitely forget it. Draco too didn’t look that flawlessly anymore. His hair started curling up and it just amazed Harry.</p><p>-Sure. Whatever you’ll get,-Harry nodded and walked towards the alcohol-free table. Draco watched him with a smile. He was more than happy with the way the night was going. Until…</p><p>-Mister Malfoy!-he heard a loud voice behind himself and saw Filch running towards him. Draco sighed,-Mister Malfoy!-poor old man was out of breath and carrying around his old fat cat didn’t help much too.</p><p>-Yes?</p><p>-You have to go now! Right now!-Filch grabbed him by the sleeve and started dragging Draco towards the door.</p><p>-Go where? Let go of me!</p><p>-Your mother is here to take you! The portal closes in 15 minutes! Come quick!</p><p>-What? No, my mom will come tomorrow,-Draco rushed to explain.</p><p>-There must have been a change of plans, she is in Hogsmeade now!</p><p>-But…my stuff…,-Draco mumbled, not caring about his stuff at all.</p><p>-Already there! Malfoy!-Filch made another attempt to make Draco move.</p><p>-I just have to talk to someone. Give me a second!-Draco looked around, but Harry seemed to have disappeared again.</p><p>-No time! 15 minutes till the portal closes! Let’s go!-Draco fought for another minute, at least trying to buy himself some time until Harry returns. But he didn’t, and Draco had no choice but to follow Filch. On his way out he tried calling for Ron or Hermione, to warn them, to ask them to warn Harry too, but they didn’t hear him. Draco couldn’t believe he had to leave like that. Just for the holidays, but still.</p><p>               The cold of the night woke Draco up and made the last bits of dreamy illusion he was in fade away. He wrapped his arms around himself trying to warm up and walked towards the Hogsmeade. Filch trusted Draco to go by himself and Malfoy did have an urge to run back into the castle, but there were only 10 minutes left and his mother was waiting. Draco sighed and walked.</p><p>-Malfoy!-his heart dropped when he heard a loud voice somewhere far behind himself,-Leaving without a goodbye?-Harry quickly reached Draco, still just in a shirt.</p><p>-How did you know?</p><p>-Luna told me. She said he saw how Filch made you leave,-Draco nodded. And smiled. Luna really was something else,-Can I walk you to the Hogsmeade?-his teeth were shaking, his cheeks were bright red and every word he said made a huge cloud of steam fly out of his mouth. But Harry didn’t notice it.</p><p>-Sure,-Draco felt a little warmer, just going beside someone, just going beside Harry. He hadn’t seen his mother in a long time and she wasn’t exactly happy when Draco refused to move to France with her and only agreed to spend holidays there. But Potter’s presence distracted him from nerves and anxious thoughts.</p><p>-Can I ask you to do something?-Draco asked when they almost reached the Hogsmeade.</p><p>-Okay,-Harry stopped to face him.</p><p>-Can you…can you visit Lucy on Christmas? Or after? I promised we’d celebrate together, but…</p><p>-I’ll do it. I’ll explain everything to her,-Harry agreed.</p><p>-Thank you,-Draco looked into the village. His mother was only meters away, waiting for him. He could almost see her silhouette ,-Okay then…</p><p>-You’ll come back, right? You won’t stay there? Even if Beauxbatons is better?</p><p>-No,-Draco smiled,-I’ll come back.</p><p>-Promise?</p><p>-Promise,-Draco promised gladly because the feeling of someone waiting for you was one of the most amazing things he had ever felt. The whole night was full of the most amazing things he had ever felt. He really wished he could stay, but there were minutes left and he didn’t have a choice,-Goodbye, Potter. It’s been nice.</p><p>-Yeah,-Harry suddenly looked nervous again. They stood together, freezing, but ignoring it,-Bye.</p><p>Draco smiled, took a breath and made a step towards the Hogsmeade when Harry grabbed his hand. He looked into Potter’s amazingly green eyes for a very long second, until his hands covered his cheeks and the world stopped existing. Everything stopped existing. Except for Harry’s lips on his and his hands on his face.</p><p>               The kiss ended so quickly that Draco didn’t even get to react. In a second, he was cold again and Harry was starring at him with pure terror in his eyes. Draco could only imagine how much fear was in his own eyes. He completely forgot about his mother, about Hogsmeade and France. It wasn’t like anything he had felt before.</p><p>-Okay, bye!-Harry almost shouted, turned around and ran. He ran so quickly as if a dragon was chasing him. He didn’t see how Draco watched him, risking to miss the portal, didn’t see his face. Potter didn’t see how Malfoy had nothing to do, but go find his mother and leave. Leave, but definitely come back.   </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey!<br/>This is basically the very middle of the fic - end of the first semester and all.<br/>So there's a lot coming.<br/>Hope you're enjoying, please tell me if you are.<br/>Thank you for reading. <br/>(i'll try to post the next part sooner, but i honestly can't promise anything)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry ran. Making his way through the darkness of the night, not even realizing how cold he was, he ran. His breath was short and quick and the steam out of his mouth seemed to reach the stars. He ran towards the castle, but secretly hoped to never reach it because only while he ran, he was able not to think. Or it was another lie he told himself that night. </p><p><br/>
-Harry! What’s wrong?-the voices of Ron and Hermione pulled him back into reality. They stood right in front of the entrance, Ron’s jacket on Hermione’s shoulders, concerned looks on both of their faces,-Where were you?</p><p><br/>
-Draco…his mother picked him up…,-he mumbled, hiding his eyes. His head was still far away, back in the Hogsmeade where he did something that could potentially be one of his greatest mistakes and cost him a friend. </p><p><br/>
-Now? Wasn’t he supposed to leave tomorrow?-Hermione asked.</p><p><br/>
-Change of plans, I suppose.</p><p><br/>
-Are you okay, mate? You look…freaked out…,-Harry considered telling his friends about what just happened a very, very bad idea. Especially to Ron. Ron who didn’t talk to him for weeks because Malfoy was the first to find out about Harry’s plans for future. Ron who still didn’t know that Harry went out of his way to set Malfoy free that summer. Ron who still hated Draco and probably had a reason to. There was no way he would approve of what Harry had done. There was no way anyone would. What was he even thinking?</p><p><br/>
-Harry?</p><p><br/>
-Yes?-Harry finally looked up at their faces. Hermione looked so scared. It was the look she used to give him when he told her that his scar hurt. Or every time he spoke of the horrifying details of his childhood. She probably thought something had happened to him. Her mind tended to go to the darkest places right away, especially when it was about her friends. </p><p><br/>
-What happened?-Ron asked again. And Harry wished there was someone else to answer that question because even Potter himself wasn’t sure.</p><p><br/>
-I…I don’t know…I did something…</p><p><br/>
-What?-all three of them wanted to take this conversation inside, into the warmth of Hogwarts, but all three of them also knew that the chatter and stares of curious students would ruin the atmosphere and Harry wouldn’t say a word.</p><p><br/>
-I…,-Harry closed his eyes and teleported back into that moment. He quietly sighed,-I kissed him</p><p><br/>
  The confession was met with complete silence. Harry still had his eyes closed and couldn’t see the faces of his friends, but was sure that they definitely looked straight at each other and Ron probably had to resist an urge to throw up.</p><p><br/>
-Malfoy?-Hermione asked finally. Harry couldn’t force himself to say anything, so he nodded instead.</p><p><br/>
-On the lips?-Harry groaned and Granger accepted it as a positive answer,-Well, it’s…,-she started saying something, but actually had no idea where she was going with that sentence. It was one of those rare cases where Hermione Granger didn’t know what to say. But Ron Weasley did.</p><p><br/>
-You’re in love with him,-he said. Harry stared at him with shock.</p><p><br/>
-What? No!</p><p>-Yeah, you are,-Ron smiled and put his hands in his pockets,-It’s pretty obvious, actually.</p><p><br/>
-What are you even talking about?-Harry wanted to cover his ears just not to hear the nonsense out of Weasley’s mouth. But he also blushed so desperately that he could no longer use the weather as an excuse.</p><p><br/>
-What? It’s not that big of a deal, actually</p><p><br/>
-Ron, no! Just…no! Shut up!-Harry said way louder than he wanted to,-It was just…a heat of the moment! I wasn’t thinking straight.</p><p><br/>
-Well, yes, “straight” is not a word to use here,-Ron laughed at his own joke and even Hermione couldn’t hold in a chuckle. While Harry was bright red from anger now,-Mate, it’s fine, really. It happens,-Ron shrugged.</p><p><br/>
-Did he…did he kiss you back?-Hermione asked shyly</p><p><br/>
-I don’t think so. It last for a second, I just…,-he sighed, trying to get a hold of his panic that started growing again,-What the hell is wrong with me? He’s a guy! He’s Malfoy! I’m not…I’m not…,-no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get himself to say the end of that sentence.</p><p><br/>
-Harry, it’s okay,-his friends approached him. Hermione hugged him by the waist and Ron put his hand on his shoulder,-It’s okay if you like him. Really,-Ron said.</p><p><br/>
-Out of all people, you shouldn’t be the one to say that to me,-Harry said</p><p><br/>
-What does that mean?</p><p><br/>
-You hate him! And you have a reason to. And you still want me to be with Ginny,-Ron shook his head,-Yes, you do!</p><p><br/>
-Harry, Ginny’s with Luna. She’s moved on. And I’m happy for her. All I want for you is to be happy too. Even if it’s with the ferret,-Hermione kicked him with her shoe and Ron sighed,-I don’t hate him, okay? I admit, he got better. Don’t count me as his fans though and I still can’t tell what you found in him, but…,-another kick from Hermione,-I wasn’t finished! But…if he makes you happy, I’m happy too.</p><p><br/>
  Discussing that with Ron and Hermione seemed surreal. Ridiculous, in a way. Harry and Draco weren’t even dating and judging by Malfoy’s reaction to Harry’s kiss (or complete absence of it), they weren’t going to start. Harry was very glad he wouldn’t have to see Malfoy for at least two more weeks, because if he did, after what happened, he would burn down alive, solely from embarrassment.</p><p><br/>
-Thank you, guys,-Harry decided to keep his thoughts to himself and smiled to his friends. They smiled back to him and everything seemed settled. Except…,-There’s something else I need to say though.</p><p><br/>
-Are you sure? Enough news for one day,-Ron joked</p><p>-I’m sure. It’s not news for Hermione,-she looked at Ron with a weak smile, while concern grew on his face,-I wanted to tell you for a while…</p><p><br/>
-Oh, there we go again,-Ron sighed and took a step away from Harry. In a second, Potter felt all the heart-wrenching cold the end of December had to offer,-Just say it already</p><p><br/>
-I testified for Draco this summer. I don’t know how much credit I should take for the fact that he’s free…Draco keeps saying that he owes it to me, but it’s not true,-Harry expected Ron to get mad immediately. But he wasn’t mad. His face didn’t change at all,-It wasn’t just my secret, Ron. I didn’t know if I could tell anyone, I promised Kingsley to keep it a secret, I…</p><p><br/>
-It’s okay,-Ron interrupted his river of excuses.</p><p><br/>
-Really? You’re not mad?</p><p><br/>
-Not really. I mean, I probably would be mad if you told me that before, but now that he’s basically your boyfriend,-Harry didn’t know if he should laugh or punch Ron,-And I probably should have seen that coming.</p><p><br/>
-Boyfriend thing or the court thing?-Hermione asked him.</p><p><br/>
-Both. Definitely both.</p><p> </p><p><br/>
  None of them talked about it throughout the whole holidays. On the next day after that conversation Harry, Ron and Hermione woke up a little earlier to hop on the train and leave the Hogwarts for the holidays for the last time ever and spend them at the Burrow. Harry was glad to see Ginny and Luna waiting for them on the train. Harry was even more glad when 5 of them managed to have fun during their trip with no awkward tension ex-lovers tend to have. Ginny didn’t let go of Luna’s hand till they arrived, despite weird stares they got from time to time. Harry admired and envied their bravery. And their love.</p><p><br/>
 Moly and Arthur insisted that no matter what kind of plans any of them have for the holidays, Christmas they will spend together. Just like every year. All older Weasley also promised to be there and it actually felt like a normal Christmas at the Burrow that had already become a tradition. Except it wasn’t a normal Christmas at all.<br/>
It was the first Christmas without Fred. Christmas full of acting and pretending to be happy just so others can also keep their act up. Christmas full of awkward conversation and fear of touching topics that could upset anyone, or remind of the pain every single person at the table was feeling. Harry understood Molly’s urge to get everyone together, but he had no idea how she managed to stay strong and keep smiling while absolutely everything in the house reminded her of what – of whom – she lost.</p><p><br/>
Molly had been cleaning and cooking for days and the guests were met with the familiar smell of delicious meals and deserts, mixed with usual, but unidentifiable smell that house always had. A smell of home, of sun, of love. Harry led as he walked into the house. Last summer had changed his life so much – it changed him – but The Burrow didn’t seem to change at all. It stood tall as a symbol of a home Harry thought he never had, but actually always did. The small rooms, low ceilings, narrow halls – all was so familiar and full of memories. The bittersweet feeling of nostalgia filled Harry completely.</p><p><br/>
-Finally!-Molly hugged every single one of them before letting them in. Ginny held Luna’s hand and was quite nervous to introduce her to her mother – in a letter Ginny only mentioned she was bringing in a friend. But when Ginny said who Luna actually was (and Ron stood right beside her, ready to take her side if anything bad happen), Molly’s reaction to her was only a shock about how skinny Luna was and a promise to feed her at least 6 times a day as long as they were there. But after Ginny’s sight of relief, and Ron’s laughter, Molly hugged Luna and said how happy she was for them. Then she gave a bittersweet smile to Harry, who returned it, but without a shadow of sadness.</p><p><br/>
  Soon the male side of Weasley family (accompanied by Fleur Delacour-Weasley) showed up, the table was complete and the celebration started. The whole house flooded with chatter, laughter, fake insults and love. Molly made sure that George sat next to her and held his hand almost entire time. He didn’t pretend careless or overly happy, George Weasley as usually wore his heart on his sleeve, but that didn’t mean he didn’t make jokes or make fun of Ron. That was sacred.</p><p><br/>
  The dinner ended quickly and Harry volunteered to help Molly around the kitchen. He hoped to get a moment alone with her and she seemed to have understood his intention as she immediately sent away all other help and started washing dishes in a muggle way, handing clean plates to Harry to dry.</p><p><br/>
-So, Harry, what’s new? I heard you didn’t make it to the Quidditch team,-she said, ready to comfort Potter. He just shrugged.</p><p><br/>
-It’s okay. They still won.</p><p><br/>
-Oh, yes, Ron told me all about it,-she smiled,-That Malfoy kid turned out to be not so bad, didn’t he?-Molly looked at Harry and he was paralyzed by the fear of what exactly Ron could have told her.</p><p><br/>
-Uhm, yeah, he’s…a good seeker, I guess,-Harry mumbled, putting another plate into the drawer. </p><p><br/>
-I heard you two are friends now,-Harry desperately tried to read her face, but Molly remained peaceful and content. Harry wondered if that was what she actually felt or if she was just good at hiding her emotions. </p><p><br/>
-Kind of, yes.</p><p><br/>
-Good,-she said,-I always say, all people’s problems come from the loneliness. Everyone deserves a friend,-Molly smiled and Harry smiled even brighter.  He accepted another mug from her, gathering all his courage to finally say what he wanted to say.</p><p><br/>
-I actually wanted to talk to you about something,-he started. Molly looked at him,-A few weeks ago I went to a…to an orphanage with Draco,-Harry looked away and pretended to be very invested in his dish-wiping duty. He waited for Molly to react and overall did his best to make it look as a casual conversation and not let his pounding heart and panicking brain be clear to the woman next to him.</p><p> -That’s…very kind of you.</p><p><br/>
-Draco volunteers there every weekend actually,-she nodded,-And there’s a little girl. She’s around 6, her name is Lucy and…,-Molly turned off the water as she realized where Harry was going with it. She looked at him and she read everything off of his face. Sadness, desperation, but also a ray of hope, hope that his own expectation of other people – of her – gave him. The most fragile kind of hope.</p><p><br/>
-Harry…</p><p><br/>
-I’m not asking anything from you,-he also put the plate down and turned to Molly,-She’s very lonely there. The whole week she waits for Malfoy to come, she doesn’t get along with any kids, but she is the sweetest kid I’ve ever seen.</p><p><br/>
-Harry…,-the look of concern appeared on Molly’s face. She wiped her hands with her apron and reached to take Harry’s.</p><p><br/>
-I’m not asking anything,-he repeated,-But Ron always says how lonely you are and he hates it. I do too,-he blushed, but didn’t allow himself to stop now,-Lucy needs a home and when I was thinking of who could accept someone else’s child, give them home and love them as her own, I could only think of you,-Harry saw tears on Molly’s eyes. He was on verge of crying too,-I am…I am so grateful for everything you gave me. And I’ll never be able to pay you back, but…,-a few tears fell down Harry’s eyes and Molly rushed to hug him.</p><p><br/>
-You don’t need to pay me back, Harry,-she said, tears in her voice,-I love you like a son. You are my son,-she said, now cupping Harry’s face. She looked so serious, but so amazingly loving, Harry couldn’t understand how that much love could fit in one person. How can a person be so damn strong, go through so much pain and walk out of it gracefully, still capable of smiling, loving and being happy,-I need to talk to Arthur first. But…next time you visit her, let me know,-she said and the ray of hope Harry had turned into a whole sun.</p><p><br/>
-Of course! Thank you, thank you so much,-Harry hugged Molly, closing his eyes. He imagined Lucy’s face when she meets Molly for the first time. God, she will love her so much. And though he kept himself from doing it for weeks while practicing this conversation with Molly in his head, Harry imagined Draco’s face when he tells him that he had found a home for Lucy. Those two pictures didn’t let Harry sleep at night, he couldn’t wait to start actually doing something about it, he didn’t want Lucy to spend another day in that place. Once again, Harry Potter made a huge mistake of letting his expectations go way too high, but this time he thought they could actually match the reality.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Heyyy<br/>Not sure about this part, it kinda sucks, but maybe you'll like it.<br/>Thank you for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>During the holidays Harry Potter made a strategic decision to erase that kiss from his memory and act like it never happened. Only four people on Earth knew about it; he asked Ron and Hermione to never mention it and he was certain Draco would rather go to Azkaban than acknowledge it. In his mind, it was the only way to save their relationship – or whatever it was they had – from crushing completely, from becoming cold and forced, from awkwardness that will drive two boys from each other. He just wished he could stop thinking (and dreaming) about what could have happened if they did talk about it, but too many things could go too wrong.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In a blink of an eye, holidays were over and Harry found himself standing on the platform, waiting for Hogwarts Express again. Ron and Hermione insisted that they would travel that way, instead of just apparating. Harry didn’t have a nerve to fight them on it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He looked into the darkness of the tunnel and two thoughts possessed his mind. This was the last time in his life he stands on this platform and waits for the train to come. The last return to Hogwarts, the last term of school in his life. Merlin knows if he ever gets to go back to that school. Yes, McGonagall made a very appealing job offer to him, but if life had taught Harry one thing – it was to never focus on plans and promises and just let life flow. Let it take him wherever he was meant to be – trust the process. Harry reminded that to himself every time he felt too anxious around people like Hermione – people who knew exactly what they were doing and why. Harry had no idea. He tried to think of a single place in the wizarding world he could fit in, and couldn’t come up with anything. McGonagall’s words were the only thing keeping him from an actual crisis. And the worst thing – he never showed it to anyone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The other thing that didn’t leave Harry’s mind was, obviously and unfortunately, Malfoy. Malfoy who, once again, was nowhere to be found. No matter how that night had ended, Draco made a promise to come back. He said he had a nice time and wouldn’t stay in France, even if his mother insists. And Harry believed him, and actually counted on him keeping his promise, but the more he thought about it, the less sense it made for Draco to come back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The little pieces of information Harry did have about what Draco’s life looked like right now and what was on his heart, weren’t promising. Harry thought that he would be the one haunted by the war forever, but the more time he spent with Malfoy, the more he understood – Draco’s mind, his whole body, was haunted by the ghosts of his past. A misunderstood villain, a Death Eater, a traitor, a murderer – the list of the names that seemed to have been written on his back was endless. It was normal for Draco to want to get away and start over. It was actually a lot like him. Harry seemed to have memorized Narcissa’s letter to her son and now, thinking of her promises and her words, Harry’s “you’ll have a place to crash if something goes wrong” seemed so unbelievably stupid and insignificant. Maybe he should have said more that day. Why didn’t he say more?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Mate?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry looked up and his eyes met Ron’s concerned ones. The train was right in front of them and Harry was blocking the entrance. He shook his head, trying to shake away all his thoughts and worries and pushed a weak smile out of himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Sorry, I really want to sleep,-Harry stepped onto the train and let others walk in too. Harry, Ron and Hermione waited till other students found their seats and compartments, while Harry was attentively looking into the crowd. In a few minutes everyone was inside and the doors were about to close.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It doesn’t have to mean he stayed,-Hermione said to Harry. He hadn’t spoken of Malfoy for days now, but his friends knew exactly what was on his mind. At least that part,-He could have apparated.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I know,-for some reason Harry was certain he wouldn’t. For some reason, Harry was assured that if he doesn’t get to see him that day, on that train – he will never see him again. Maybe on the newspaper, in dozens of years when both of them will forget about each other. Will he ever forget about him?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Did he write to you? Or did you?-Ron asked. They started slowly moving across the train, looking for empty seats. Harry stopped at every entrance and looked out the small window. It wasn’t a very long train and with every failed attempt to see Draco, bits of his hope faded away.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,-Harry actually thought of writing to him on Christmas. Just wish something nice, tell him about how he met with Lucy and all. But he quickly got rid of that idea, confident that Malfoy wouldn’t reply.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-The train is about to move,-Hermione looked upset and Harry smiled, hoping to cheer her up. He couldn’t see himself, but did his best to make the smile look authentic.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It’s okay. Really,-he added when neither of his friends looked assured,-Let’s just sit down somewhere,-Hermione nodded and took Harry’s hand. He wished they wouldn’t take it so seriously. He wished he could stop taking it so seriously. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The real magic was when they managed to find an absolutely empty compartment in an overcrowded train. Ron started loading their luggage into it and Harry helped him, but he still turned around every time he thought he heard a sound. Harry only made his peace with Draco not showing up, when the train started moving and the picture outside the window was too blurry to see anything in.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry fell asleep almost immediately. He didn’t lie when he told Ron he was sleepy – Harry could hardly sleep last night, his brain was too busy going over past memories and imaginary scenarios to shut down. Harry hadn’t felt so much excitement and nerves before going to Hogwarts for a while. The sound of rails touching the ground and quiet conversations of his school-mates worked like a lullaby for Harry and he slept through his entire trip. Once the train stopped, he woke up in even a worse mood – he had skipped his last Hogwarts Express ride.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There was no feast or welcoming dinner for those who returned from homes. Usual meal awaited Hogwarts students and McGonagall’s speech about upcoming exams and how everyone should have already started studying by now only made everything worse. Harry sat at his table, with an empty seat next to him and thought – is he fully responsible for Draco’s decision to stay in France? Is that kiss – that idiotic thing he did – scratched out everything that made Hogwarts – or even Britain – a home for Malfoy? Did it overweigh all his positive memories? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry never liked running away from things. From problems, from battles, from feelings. He admitted his feelings for Cho Chang right away. He allowed himself to feel that jealousy that ate him alive when he saw Ginny kissing other guys. And just as easily, he accepted the fact that he doesn’t feel it towards her anymore. Harry was sure he knew himself. But with Malfoy it was so much different, it pissed him off. And though he was still very, very confused about everything that concerned him, one thing Harry knew for sure. That kiss wasn’t worth it. If he doesn’t even get to see him again – that kiss definitely wasn’t worth it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-I think we all should ask Slughorn for extra classes,-Harry didn’t pay much attention to Ron and Hermione talking about the exams. The three of them were headed towards the common room and Harry wondered who would occupy the free bed in his dorm. That nap he took on the train only made him more tired and he couldn’t wait for the moment he gets to crawl under the covers of his bed and fall asleep. Finally stop thinking.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Extra classes? Mione, don’t you think we have enough on our plate?-Ron asked her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want to fail potions,-she said. Ron had nothing to say, but the idea of extra classes terrified him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I could help you with potions.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry was sure he was the only one who heard that voice, and that it was a weird hallucination created by a tired brain. He was certain there wasn’t anyone behind his back, and definitely not Malfoy, with his usual smirk and confident face expression. It didn’t even make sense to turn around now. But he did. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh well!-Ron reacted quicker that Harry could,-Look who decided to show up!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ron and Draco smiled at each other and looked like a couple of old friends. It warmed Harry’s heart.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Can’t help but make a dramatic entrance, Malfoy?-Hermione asked him, but once again – no venom in her voice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It’s actually quite the opposite. I forgot my wand. Had to go back for it and missed the train,-he shrugged. Ron and Hermione pretended to believe him and Draco looked at Harry. Harry seemed to have blushed solely from his sight and definitely wasn’t going to say anything, even if he could. So, Hermione, being a good friend, decided to take control over the situation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-So, Malfoy,-she stood closer to him and started walking. All three boys followed her as she led them to the common room,-How was France? Have you visited Bordeaux?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh yes!-Draco immediately got pulled into a long conversation about France and its beauty. From time to time Draco and Hermione started talking in French and though neither Harry nor Ron could understand them, they listened as if they were hypnotized. They crossed the whole castle in what seemed like a second. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry was still not even making eye contact with Draco as they walked into the common room. Hermione wished them all good night, kissed Ron and disappeared inside the girls’ dorm. In a moment Ron left too. Which gave Harry and Draco nothing to do but go into their dorm.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Usually, Harry saw Anthony Goldstein and Ernie McMillan as just school- and dormmates – he was never friends with them, never talked to them for more than a minute and their presence in the dorm never bothered him, but their absence didn’t either. However, that day Harry was ready to fall on his knees and pray for those two to be in the dorm; to be loud, to get him into a conversation, to distract him, to let him do anything but be alone with Malfoy and talk to him. Harry opened the door to the dorm with shaken hands. It was absolutely empty.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All their stuff was already in the room and both boys started quietly arranging it into closets and drawers – something Harry had never done before. Usually his luggage stayed beside his bed for the whole year – he just took things he needed and then put it back. But this time, Harry just needed something to get busy with.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-So, how was Christmas?-Draco interrupted the silence first. It was so sudden that almost scared Harry. He turned towards Draco’s bed and saw him sitting on it, folding his clothes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Good. I visited Lucy,-Harry quickly turned around,-She says hi.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thanks,-Harry had a lot more to say about Lucy, but, for some reason, just couldn’t. The only thing he could think about when he was looking at Draco, was that kiss. And his shocked face. And Harry was assured that Draco was thinking about the exact same thing and a feeling of disgust filled him every time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-How was your Christmas?-Harry asked, just not to give himself away, to make it look as if everything was fine.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Fine. We went to Paris,-Harry nodded. He had finished arranging his clothes a while ago, and now was just randomly taking things out and putting them back in. Anything not to just sit there with nothing to do,-Is everything okay?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That question made Harry’s heart skip a beat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Of course, why?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, you are organizing your belongings – that’s new,-Draco scoffed. Harry didn’t feel like laughing,-And you don’t even look at me.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Looking back, Harry was 100% sure that at that moment, something external made Harry turn around. He did it absolutely involuntarily, his body just turned.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Everything is fine,-Harry tried to read Draco’s face – now that they were looking at each other again – and Draco seemed…absolutely normal. Not nervous, not shaky, not red from embarrassment as Harry probably was. Calm and handsome – just like usual.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay,-Draco got up and Harry thought of the next time he actually gets to talk to Malfoy in private. Merlin knows when that’ll happen. And he had something important to say.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Wait,-Harry stopped Draco right before he touched the doorknob,-I do have something to tell you.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’m listening,-Draco sat back down. Harry did his best to just shove all his feelings and fears somewhere deep, where they can’t bother him and have a normal conversation, as if nothing had happened. Because that’s what he actually planned to do! Act as if nothing had happened.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don’t want to get your hopes up high now, but I’ll just tell you what’s happening now and then you’re free to interpret what I say the way you want and make your own conclusions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, that’s too many smart words per sentence, what is happening?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I spent Christmas with the Weasleys,-Harry started, ignoring Draco’s comment,-And I talked to Molly Weasley about a lot of things. About Lucy too,-Draco sat up as soon as he heard her name.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Wait…you didn’t…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I just told her about Lucy. The next day we visited her together.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, you’re not saying that…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-They are taking her,-Harry finished Draco’s thought for him,-It’s not settled yet, it’s far from being done, but Analise loves the Weasleys, and they love Lucy and right now they’re putting the documents together and…I think it may actually work,-Harry finished. Draco stared at him in shock.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Are you serious? Is it actually happening?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah,-Harry smiled. That was the face he wanted to see, the moment he had been imagining in his head for days,-I think.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, you are insane,-Draco chuckled and covered his face with his hands. When a few moments later, he pulled them away, Harry saw that his eyes were red and teary,-I don’t know what to say. How to thank you for that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I didn’t do anything,-Harry got up, Draco did too,-Plus, it’s way too early. Things can still go wrong. They tend to do so when I’m involved,-Harry made a joke, but Draco seemed to have missed it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thank you,-he said and put his hand on Harry’s shoulder,-I mean it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-S-sure,-all the emotions Harry had buried went back afloat and drowned Harry’s stability and calmness. He blushed so brightly and desperately under Draco’s attentive, clear eyes that he felt the heat in his whole body. At the same time, he wanted to respond to that innocent touch, and also fall under the ground and never crawl out of it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Unfortunately, both options were taken away from him as right before Draco opened his mouth to say something else, they heard a sound coming from the door and the next second Anthony and Ernie walked in. By the time they were in the dorm, Draco was already on his side of the room. He closed his bag and pushed it under the bed, with absolutely calm eyes. Anthony cheered seeing Harry and both of them started attacking him with questions about Christmas, holidays and exams. They didn’t catch undertones of annoyance in Harry’s answers and before he gathered courage to leave them, Malfoy had already sneaked out. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I've been out of the town with no internet for almost 5 days<br/>shall i say i almost lost my mind?<br/>Anyway, here's the new chapter, really hope you enjoy it, though it's kinda annoying to me lmao.<br/>Thank you for reading! Don't forget to leave a comment if you like the fic!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Narcissa Malfoy didn’t take her son’s wish to stay in Britain after Hogwarts seriously. She understood why he may not want to change schools and stay in Hogwarts for his last semester, but his reasons on staying in Britain were unclear to her. Narcissa did the impossible to organize everything, to make everything ready for Draco to move in with her: she managed to get a good (even good enough for Draco’s spoiled taste) apartment for the little money she had, convinced Madam Maxime to enroll Draco in the middle of the school year with no tests or exams (she didn’t want him to go through any stress), even got an internship in the local hospital for him, when she heard that Draco wanted to go into medicine. The thought that she had abandoned him in that school made Narcissa feel unworthy of the title “mother” she so proudly wore. It made her ready to do anything to make her son happy. She just couldn’t see how he could be happy…there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  She sent him back almost not making a scene and not starting a fight. Narcissa just casually reminded him about the internship and how soon they’d be together again. It was Draco who had started that fight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Since his childhood he hated one thing so much that it made him physically shake and his pale skin turned red. He made scenes and started scandals, no matter if they were in public or not. In the end, Draco always was a spoiled kid. And he absolutely hated when people didn’t listen to him. That trait stayed with him to this day; he just managed to control it. But when his mother said that she would be expecting him after graduation, he flipped again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Not that he was so eager to live with Potter in his dark and old apartment that had lost all its chic decades ago. And not that France hadn’t impressed him – it did, very much. He fell in love with pretty much every place Narcissa took him to and definitely planned to return. But just as a tourist. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Draco just didn’t want to run away. Didn’t want to confirm his “coward” status even more. Maybe it was McGonagall’s speech, maybe one of Harry’s, but something made Draco want to at least try. Something lit that fire of ambition and determination that the war had put out. Draco was aware that his chances of achieving pretty much anything were pathetic and he had absolutely no idea what he was doing 99% of the time, yet, he wanted to keep trying. And Narcissa had to make her peace with that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>  So, the first thing that Draco did to make his plan (the one that didn’t really exist, yeah) come true was return to Hogwarts safely and focus on his damn classes. For a person who had almost nothing going on in his life he sure wasn’t studying much. He took a few extra classes (they included extra Potions, alchemy and muggle studies). Muggle studies class was half-empty all the time, which made the teacher’s hatred towards Draco clear as day.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-So Professor Mann hates me,-Draco declared as he returned from his second MS class ever. Ron, Harry and Hermione had free hour at that time and spent (wasted) it in the common room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What makes you say that?-Hermione asked, not looking up from her book. She was the only busy person in the whole room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Oh, I have a reason,-Draco sat down on the couch and closed his eyes. Harry and Ron were sitting opposite to him, both pretended to be reading, but as Draco brought up something more interesting, they put their textbooks away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What happened?-Harry asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-She gave us homework – essays,-Draco started,-Most of the group got assignments like “Entertainment in muggle world” or…”Main genres in muggle literature”, things like that. Guess what I got.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one dared to take a guess.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Nazis. I was assigned to write an essay on Nazi Party,-Hermione’s jaw dropped. She looked at Draco in disbelief.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-She didn’t…,-she said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Oh, she did. Deadline is tomorrow. Anyone willing to help?-Draco’s tone was full of sarcasm, which hid all the rage and pain in his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-This is unacceptable! We need to talk to McGonagall!-Hermione claimed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Wait…who are Nazis again?-Ron asked and Harry was glad he did, because Potter knew (or thought he knew) who they were, but couldn’t imagine a teacher being cruel enough to assign Draco to write about them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-They’re basically…a…a political party that was rather…,-Hermione tried to find the right words and avoid the simplest explanation that Draco immediately provided:</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-They’re muggle Death Eaters,-he said. Ron’s jaw followed Hermione’s example.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Not completely!-she rushed to correct him,-But it is a good comparison, yes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ron was too shocked to say anything, while Harry immediately got to his feet, full of unclear determination. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What are you doing?-Draco looked at him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-We’re going to Headmistress, now,-he said, grabbing Ron by his arm and reaching for Hermione,-All of us. We’ll complain to her,-Ron and Hermione supported Harry’s idea, but Draco remained sitting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-No.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Why?-Hermione asked him because Harry was too angry to say anything,-It was a very problematic thing to do, she knew what she was doing. You can’t just let her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I know that she knew. But I’m not going to complain to anyone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Then I’ll do it!-Harry said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Potter, calm down,-Draco replied,-I’m not going to run and cry to McGonagall every time someone points me to…that. It’s just an assignment, after all.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-You know it’s not,-Hermione sat down next to him. Neither Ron nor Harry noticed how these two managed to get along so well,-Aren’t you hurt?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Not important,-Draco got up,-Don’t do anything, okay? I can handle this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Where are you going?-Harry asked him as Draco headed towards the door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-To the library. Gotta study some Nazis, I guess.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Harry considered going to McGonagall without Draco’s consent and awareness, but he realized how mad Draco would be when he finds out (and he definitely would) and it stopped him. Instead, Harry just kept trying to force   Draco to do it himself, but Malfoy declined it, together with Harry’s offers to help him study.  In fact, Draco told him to never talk about it again and just “leave him alone”. Harry pretended it didn’t hurt him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Actually, his plan on pretending that everything between them was fine and nothing changed after the Christmas was working pretty well, because Malfoy definitely played his part spectacularly. Nothing in his behavior had changed, nothing hinted on him being uncomfortable or awkward around Harry; Potter even started doubting if the kiss really happened or it was just in his head. Either way, without even knowing it, Draco cleared some things out for Harry. That kiss was a mistake that should never be repeated ever again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Harry told himself that every time he caught himself starring at Draco too long and noticing how unbelievably long his lashes are, and how is it even possible for a guy? Or during those rare occasions when Draco laughed and Harry couldn’t help but smile too, even if they were in a “fight” or the joke was directed at him. He got what he wanted; Draco was his friend – they were all friends now! - he seemed happier, hardly anyone bullied him, and if someone did Draco had an outlet – three friends to complain to. But still…that “what if” that had already lost all the reasons to exist wouldn’t leave him alone and it (and he) was all Harry could think about.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>-I can’t do this anymore,-Rom said into the peaceful silence of the library, shutting the book. The sound raised some heads and the librarian shushed him. Ron mocked her when she couldn’t see,-I just can’t! It’s Friday! We’re in the library! Are you kidding me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What do you want us to do, Weasley?-Draco asked, yawning,-Exams don’t care what day it is,-Hermione nodded at his words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-No! Stop it!-Ron said, when Granger reached for his book,-We’re wasting time here!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-No. You are wasting time. We are studying,-Hermione said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Do you think in 15 years we will remember this studying sessions and sleepless nights?-Ron asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Ron, I think all of us have enough crazy memories about school,-Harry spoke up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I know, but do you we have any fun memories? Not much,-no one resisted him, but to be fair, hardly anyone listened,-We got Malfoy now! All our group memories are just murder plotting,-Draco scoffed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-So what do you offer?-Harry asked, thinking that it would be easier to listen to Ron than to make him stop talking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Let’s go out for the weekend. Take two days off, have fun, all four of us!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-And do what exactly?-Hermione asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Whatever we want,-Ron smiled and locked his arms on his chest,-We can go to a bar, we can just walk around London, we can go to that muggle restaurant you like,-Ron said to Hermione and she smiled. Being a person who actually needed to study the least, she had biggest bags under her eyes and slept less than anyone in that library. That little vacation sure seemed attractive to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I don’t know…We do need to study,-she said, but confidence in her voice almost didn’t exist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-And we will!-Ron said, taking her hand,-Next week. Come on, Mione, let’s do it!-Ron gave her that puppy-eyes look Hermione could resist just fine, but this time decided not to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Fine, let’s do it. We deserve some rest. Harry, Draco?-she asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Sure,-Harry agreed and closed his book. He looked at Malfoy, waiting for his reply.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-That is a good idea. I can’t go, but you three have fun,-he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Hey!-Harry kicked his shoulder with his,-What do you mean you can’t? What plans do you have?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I have some,-he said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-If it’s about the orphanage, I’m sure Analise and Lucy will understand and you deserve…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-It’s not,-Draco cut him off,-I gotta go home.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-To the Manor?-Ron asked. Draco nodded,-Why?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I need to pick up some things,-Draco said,-But you go, really. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Are you sure you can’t postpone?-Hermione asked him. Draco smiled and shook his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I need to do this,-he looked at the clock,-I’ll leave early, so I guess, see you on Monday?-three heads nodded unenthusiastically,-Good night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Draco walked out, leaving Ron and Hermione only a little upset – excitement about tomorrow overshadowed all other feelings - and Harry in a strong feeling that he had just been lied to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Harry was a bit tired of Draco acting that way; storming out with no explanation, lying or not telling complete truth. If they were friends – and Malfoy mostly acted like they were – aren’t they supposed to trust each other with stuff like that? Have each other’s backs and all? Harry didn’t know Draco’s reasons to act the way it did and it pissed him off. Was it the lack of trust? Or is it still about that kiss? Is this why he didn’t want to go out with them?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Harry told himself he wouldn’t follow Draco and get the answers out of him. He stayed on his seat and repeated himself that.  For two solid minutes. And then he groaned, got up and headed to their dorm, with one clear intention.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Hey,-Harry found Draco reading on his bed. The dorm was empty and it was the most private-conversation-friendly atmosphere Harry could think of.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Hey. Did you do decided where you’d go tomorrow?-Draco asked, but Harry instantly figured out his move of acting like nothing was wrong.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Not yet,-Harry sat down on his bed,-Are you sure you can’t make it?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Yeah. I need to get some books out before the house is sold,-Draco didn’t even look up from his book.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-But can’t you do it any other day? Next weekend maybe?-he shook his head,-It just sounds like you have an appointment there or something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-You’re saying I’m lying?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-No, no! But if it’s just a bit of packing, you can do it tomorrow and then we’ll pick you up from there. I mean, how long can that take?-Draco froze. He stared into the page but Harry could tell he wasn’t reading anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Potter, what do you want from me?-Draco asked, slamming his book shut and putting it down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-The truth! I don’t believe it’s just about the packing. If you don’t want to go with us, just say it!</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Oh dear Merlin,-Draco sighed,-I’m meeting the buyer, okay? My mother asked me to, so tomorrow I will give a person who is trying to buy the house I grew up in a damn tour so he definitely doesn’t reject us. Happy now?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry was embarrassed to admit that once again, he was amazingly wrong. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Oh,-Harry said,-I didn’t know. I’m sorry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Never mind,-Draco returned to his book.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Why do you have to do this though?-Harry got up and sat at the end of Draco’s bed,-You don’t even want the house to be sold.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Because my mom can’t. I don’t know, she has some business to take care of there and can’t make it to Britain in time,-Draco mumbled,-I don’t have much of a choice here</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-But that’s terrible!-Harry suddenly remembered how he visited his home with Hermione. It seemed like forever ago. Harry definitely wouldn’t be able to do it without her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Yeah, I know,- one thing was crystal clear – Draco didn’t want to go there. He didn’t want to meet that person, he didn’t want to take part in selling his own house. If he couldn’t do anything to stop it, he definitely didn’t want to help make it happen. And returning to destroyed Manor, all alone…how horrible will that feel?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I’ll go with you,-Draco looked up at Harry</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-What? You shouldn’t have to do it alone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Potter, don’t be a hero, you have plans,-Draco started flipping pages again, but once again, couldn’t focus.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Don’t you think Ron and Hermione would rather go alone than with me as their third wheel?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Well…that’s their problem.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Stop being so dramatic and let me help you,-Harry moved slightly closer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-I can do it alone. It’s not that big of a deal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Maybe,-Harry shrugged,-But you don’t have to do everything alone. Even if it’s not a big deal</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry made it look as if going with Draco into the ruins that used to be Malfoy Manor – a haunted house, in which he and all his friends could die, the place that became the closest thing to a home Voldemort could have, a place that still appeared in their nightmares – both Harry’s and Draco’s – was the easiest, most casual thing ever. A walk in the park. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-If you insist,-Draco mumbled, hiding his eyes,-I was going to leave at 10 am. The buyer will be there at midday, but I do have some packing to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-Okay,-Harry jumped off the bed,-Good night, I’ll tell Ron and Hermione I’m not going with them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>  Harry left the room before Draco could say anything. Left the room before he could change his mind. It was still an open question, who wanted to go into that house less – Harry or Draco. Potter did believe that Malfoy didn’t deserve to go through that alone, but he would much rather also go drinking and having fun, than travel through his scariest and darkest memories at the Malfoy Manor.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I don't know what to say, here's the new chapter, hope you enjoy!❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It rained that day. At 10 am, when Draco and Harry left Hogwarts, only a few drops of water hit their heads, but by the time they stood in front of the lonely, cold, yet somehow proud Manor, rain was almost pouring.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry quickly whispered a protection spell, seeing how Draco was not ready to step in just yet, and the rain started avoiding them, as if an invisible umbrella was above their heads. Draco looked at his own house and it was hard to read his face. Harry saw sadness - a great deal of it - but also fear. Or maybe not fear, maybe it was a stamp of old fear, of terrible events that took place here, of everything Draco had to do and see. Just by being there, he had to relive it all again. So did Harry. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Ready?-Potter asked when the time they spent in front of the house became uncomfortably long.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,-Draco said and stepped forward, outside of Harry's "umbrella". His hair immediately got wet, but he didn't seem to care. He walked through half-destroyed gates, ones that now didn't perform its function at all. Harry rushed to follow him, but Draco stopped once again, now before the main entrance. The door was tall, old, yet it was in a better condition than the rest of the house. Draco touched its surface with his fingertips and then, with a sigh, he pushed the door. It opened, as if it had been waiting for him this whole time. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry wondered if the house was just open, for anyone to walk in, but didn't find courage to ask. In fact, he felt so awkward and out-of-place, that he wondered if tagging along was a right decision. Maybe Draco did have to come here alone. Maybe it would be harder, but maybe it would be a healing process. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Well, if Harry did ask Draco about the doors, he'd find out about the last thing Narcissa Malfoy did before leaving Britain for as long as she could. She put a spell, a very powerful spell upon the Manor. Only a person who considers this place a home, only someone for whom this house has been a home can walk in. Draco faced no obstacles walking in, and since he wanted Harry to be with him at this moment, Potter stepped inside easily too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As powerful as that spell was, it couldn't protect the Manor from destruction and harm that got way too visible in a very short time. Even the roof started leaking and some part of the rain sneaked into the house and it was just as cold as outside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco stopped in the center of the huge hall. Harry assumed it was a living room. The floors were dusty, some furniture was broken. Many portraits on the walls were torn, the whole house was "upside down" - a parody of what it once was, a cruel joke. And Draco just looked at it, at this mess, unable to do anything, because whatever he does, it won't matter. He could clean up, fix everything, try to give the greatness back to these walls, but all his efforts will be for another man to take, and Draco just couldn't do it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He turned around and his eyes stumbled on Harry - it was as if he had just remembered Potter was here. Harry gave him an awkward, apologetic sight. Draco's hair started drying up, and, to Harry's sincere surprise, some strands started curling up, giving Draco a completely new look. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-I...I need to get some books,-Draco said, nodding at the bookshelves on the opposite side of the room.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Sure. Can I help?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, no,-Draco closed his eyes and shook his head. It looked like every word he said hurt him, every breath he took was almost unbearable. Harry felt an urge to help, but had no idea how to do that,-You can just..walk around. Or wait. I don't know. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He walked towards the shelves, dragging a huge bag with himself. As he reached the library, he started throwing books - most likely very rare and expensive books - into the bag. Harry didn't move. He couldn't see Draco's face, but the silence that was only interrupted by his shaky breath and sighs wasn't a good sign for him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco really took his time with the books, and Harry couldn’t just stand anymore. His eyes jumped from one torn painting to another shattered statue. This house used to have so much to offer.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In a few minutes Harry heard a whimper. He looked at Draco right away and saw him, looking down at his bag that was completely full of books. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Is everything okay?-Harry asked, feeling how it was the dumbest thing he could possibly ask.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-They. ..they don't fit,-Draco's fists were clenched and Harry could see all the efforts Malfoy made not to break down crying. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Let me help,-in a few big steps, Harry destroyed the distance between them and took out his wand. Draco didn't look at him,-Hermione taught me this one,-Harry said before putting a spell on the bag. All of the books seemed to have disappeared, creating a plenty of room, but they actually still were there. They just hit the bottom, of a nearly bottomless bag</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What?-Draco picked the bag up, put his hand into it and took out one of the volumes. Completely safe and normal-sized. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thanks,-Draco said, still a little confused. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No problem,-Harry smiled to him, and only after not getting a smile in return, he realized how inappropriate that smile was, and once again started beating himself up for being so damn stupid.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Draco continued gathering the books. He opened some of them, and with every time,he seemed to get sadder and sadder. Harry still just watched him, secretly hoping Draco would ask for another favor. But he didn't. He got the last book from the lowest shelf, opened it and Harry saw how something fell off from between the pages. Draco picked it up and a quiet gasp crawled out of his chest as he saw what it was.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was hard for Harry to judge what exactly upset Draco - he assumed it was a photograph. Draco stared at it for a good minute and his eyes filled up with tears. They fell on the dirty floor, Draco saw two drops of clear water and they woke him up. He looked at Harry, wiped his eyes and turned around.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-I'll be back in a moment,- he said and ran upstairs. Harry couldn't resist an urge to follow him, but stopped before the stairs. Still, he saw behind which door Draco disappeared. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Potter sighed. His heart, his instincts, everything he usually listens to in difficult situations told him to follow Draco and not leave him alone in a moment like this, but Harry shut down those voices. He walked back to the bookshelves and saw a small white rectangle on the floor - Draco dropped it as he ran off. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry picked it up. He was right, it was a photograph. A Malfoy family portrait. Lucius Malfoy - with his hair slightly shorter than Harry remembered and a happy smile on his lips - was sitting on a big beautiful chair. Narcissa - young and gorgeous - was standing beside him. Her hand was on her shoulder and she smiled even brighter than her husband. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And Draco...Draco was about 6 years old in that picture, Harry thought. He was sitting on his father's lap and his smile...Harry had never seen him smile like that and regretted it dearly. The boy in the picture hardly had any similarities with Draco that was upstairs right now, but Harry knew it was him. Snow White hair fell on his forehead, clear grey eyes looked directly into the camera, there was light in them, there was love in them. Dimples on his blushed cheeks...Harry smiled too. Just like Draco a few minutes ago, Harry couldn't look away from the picture.He had to admit; he always saw Malfoys as a family of tyrants, who didn't care about anything but themselves, and the word "love", or "happiness" were unknown to them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>           This picture just showed Harry how wrong he was. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He ran up the stairs. He didn't even notice how he put the photograph into his pocket, he just felt like Draco had spent a weirdly long time in the same room without making a sound. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He stopped in front of the door that Potter could only assume lead into his bedroom. He raised his fist and took a deep breath before knocking. No one reacted. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco? Are you okay?- still silence. Harry knocked a few more times and after not receiving any reaction, tried the doorknob to see if the door was open. It was. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Potter pushed the door, expecting for at least a thousand complaints and insults to fly his way, but the room was silent. Terrifyingly silent.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry stormed in, not holding back anymore. It was a normal bedroom - a king sized bed near the wall, a huge wooden closet - one of the expensive ones, probably antique. A mirror on the wall closest to Harry, in which he could see his scared face, a few posters (Slytherin and Bulgarian Quidditch team ones) and a big, wide window that looked out to the backyard. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>From where Harry was standing, the room seemed empty, inhabited, but clean. It was actually pretty disturbing, since the rest of the house looked haunted and abandoned, while this room made an impression that someone was still living in it. They just left it for a few minutes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry walked towards the bed. His eyes were glued to the window, that was open and dark green curtains that flew up as the wind blew helped Harry make sure of it. Of course his mind went to the darkest place. Of course he had already started beating himself up for leaving Draco alone for so long in the first place.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,no,no,-Harry whispered as he walked past the closet, towards the window. Thankfully, he kept looking around too, and when his eyes stumbled upon a figure sitting on the floor, his heart jumped.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The closet was just a little smaller than the wall it was standing against, which created a bit of space between it and another wall. Since his childhood, that dusty little corner was Draco’s favorite place to hide during hide-and-seek, or when he just wanted his parents to freak out a bit. Unfortunately, they quickly learned his moves and started finding him pretty easily, but still, those a few times when Lucius nearly had a heart attack as he cheerfully opened the door with a loud “HA!” confident to find his little son under the covers (or the bed, if he was smart enough), but seeing nothing but an empty room and an open window.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco didn’t mean to scare Harry though. He just needed a moment to breathe.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Hey,-Potter kneeled in front of Draco. Malfoy was hugging his knees, hiding his face, but his shoulders were shaking, though no sound came out of his mouth,-What’s wrong? Are you okay?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes,-Draco said in a voice that gave Harry goosebumps. Of course he wasn’t okay. People who are okay don’t run away to hide and cry their eyes out in their old room,-Go back downstairs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I need to make sure you’re okay,-hardly anything could make Harry go downstairs now. He put his hand on Draco’s knee and hoped he would finally look up,-Draco. Please.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What?- he raised his sight. His face was red, and so were his eyes. They stopped at Harry’s as if asking what he wanted from him. He didn’t like crying in front of people. He didn’t have much of a choice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Talk to me,-Harry whispered and all the awkwardness and tension he had been feeling since he set foot into this house disappeared, leaving room for a whole new feeling that had actually been on Harry’s heart for a while. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I can’t do this,-Draco broke down again. He covered his face, endlessly embarrassed, even more hurt. That photograph was just a last push - he had been on edge for too long to remember. Maybe it was since mom left. Aren’t moms supposed to solve all your problems instantly, not hand you more of them?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Or maybe it started when dad got locked away and Draco didn’t. Draco still wondered if father hated him for that. If he thought that Draco could do more to set him free. And if he actually could.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It probably went even further back - to the sixth year - when Draco thought he got everything he wanted - a chance to prove himself, a chance to match his father’s greatness, to be worthy of his name, but ended up getting a scar after a scar. A mark on his arm that will never leave, no matter how many old spells he tries on himself, no matter how many times he’ll cry about it before (or instead of) sleeping, no matter how hard he will scrub it in the shower, or cut it; and a whole spider-web of scars, scars that a boy currently sitting in front of him left. The boy that now claims to be his friend, the one that suddenly started caring for him, comforting him when he’s falling apart, kissing him so he wouldn’t leave.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>These thoughts aren’t helping.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco?-Harry tried again and again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I really want to leave,-Draco whispered, more to himself than to Harry. But Potter perceived his words as a game plan.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-When is the buyer coming?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don’t know,-Draco took a deep breath and looked at the clock on the wall,-In 20 minutes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Malfoy wasn’t ready to talk to that man, it was clear as day. He would probably deny it, but Harry wouldn’t ask anyway.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You need to breathe,-Harry said, after a few seconds of thinking,-Everything’s gonna be okay, i’ll talk to him, then we’ll leave. We’ll go back to school, or to Grimmauld , or to Lucy, if you want to,-Harry hoped his words would comfort Draco, but he just stared at him, confused.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What do you mean “you’ll talk to him”?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’ll greet him, show him around,-Harry shrugged. Draco immediately liked his idea, but that didn’t mean he would agree to it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, no,-he started getting up,-He is expecting to meet me, i’ll do it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Screw what he’s expecting! Why does that matter?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, I'm fine,-he sat down on the bed and tried to force something that was supposed to be a smile, but after a crying session as passionate and long as his, it wasn’t that easy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, you’re not,-Harry said, sitting down next to him,-And it’s okay. No one would be, in your shoes,-Draco looked down. He hated that Potter was right. He also hated how one-sided whatever type of relationship they had was. Potter just keeps saving, helping, rescuing Draco and he accepts it, asks for more and then acts bitchy about it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’m sorry,-Draco said</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You have nothing to be sorry for,-he was sitting so close, that their shoulders touched. Harry tried to look into Draco’s face, but Malfoy wouldn’t look up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, i mean...for all this crap that keep happening and how...how hard it is with me,-Draco was stuttering and everything inside of him begged him to stop this humiliation - this torture - but he went on. It was important for him to say all that. It was important for Harry to know,-I’m sorry for everything i did before. I have no idea why you’re still here after everything I did to you and your friends.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco probably had more things to be sorry about, but Harry couldn’t listen to him anymore.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Stop. Seriously stop. And don’t say that anymore,-for some reason the honesty and sincerity out of Draco’s mouth backfired and only created more distance between them. Harry felt awkward again and he hated it. He wanted to leave too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry got up and walked to the window. He lifted the curtains to see the backyard, which was beautiful, by the way. Beautiful to an extent that it made Harry wish he had gotten to see Malfoy Manor before it got destroyed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-So i assume this is your room?-Harry asked after a considerable amount of time had passed. Draco hardly moved since they last talked, still sitting on his bed, but he wasn’t crying anymore and didn’t look like he was about to, so it was better.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah,-Draco looked around.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And how is it so...you know? Compared to the rest of the house,-Harry tried to be sensitive, but failed again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-There’s a spell,-Draco said,-No force, no magic can tear this room apart. We did it together with my mother. She wanted me to have at least one safe corner in my own house,-Harry nodded. He had heard of that spell before. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They spent the next 10 minutes in silence, each in his own head. But it was a comfortable silence and they both didn’t mind. But after the 10th minute, they saw a patronus storm into a room - a mouse. It announced how Mister Houghton had arrived and is now waiting in front of the main entrance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco felt panic strike again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Just wait here,-Harry said, as calmly as he could, but was pretty nervous too.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,-Draco followed him out of the room,-I won’t just wait.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What do you offer then?-Draco wasn’t offering anything, but thankfully Harry had an idea. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They rushed downstairs, trying to be quiet (though Draco found it sort of ridiculous - how he was hiding from a stranger in his own house). Harry opened his bag and pulled out his old friend - an invisibility cloak.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Do you carry it around everywhere?-Draco asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It is useful,-Harry shrugged and covered Draco in it. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t fit all of the Draco underneath the cloak,-Why are you so damn tall?-he asked in frustration.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Jealous?-Draco asked and Harry was glad not to see that smirk he must have had.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Let’s go,-Harry pushed Draco towards a sofa - one in the corner of the room. Sitting Draco could fit under the cloak and Harry proudly smiled as he looked at him from different angles but didn’t see anything except for an old sofa.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Try not to move, don’t make a sound. I’ll be quick,-Harry said to an empty room.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Wait! How are you going to give him a tour, you didn’t see anything?-Harry did not think of that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’ll make something up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry left Draco sitting on the sofa, full of hopes that their little trick will work out and headed to the door. Behind it, there was a tall man. His ridiculous black hat made him even taller, but the man looked completely uninterested as he had been studying the ground under his feet, instead of the house before him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But as he finally raised his eyes, his brows went up and his jaw went down, when he saw who was standing in front of him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Dear Merlin! Harry Potter!-he rushed to grab Harry’s hand and shook it almost as fiercely as Analise Polkinghorne did when they first met.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Good afternoon,-Harry said, doing his best to seem professional and collected,-Please come in,-the man didn’t take off his hat, nor did he introduce himself. He didn’t even honor his future house with a smallest drop of his attention - his eyes didn’t leave Harry’s face.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What an honor to meet you, Mister Potter!-Harry wanted to ask him to call him by the first name, but quickly changed his mind. Draco wouldn’t do it,-Please forgive me if my question is rude, but to what do i owe this honor?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco - I mean, Mister Malfoy is unavailable today. I’m here in his name and i’ll be glad to show you the house.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh. I see,-he looked rather surprised,-Well, let us begin then!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry slowly walked around the halls, stopping at the rooms and corners for which he was able to make up a story. The buyer looked rather interested - he couldn’t wait to switch the subject. Harry could see it, and did his best not to let him speak.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-To be honest, I was rather surprised to hear that you and the youngest Malfoy are friends now,-he said, when Harry was thinking about his next move.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’m surprised you know about it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh, well, rumors about you spread fast, Mister Potter,-Harry didn’t know how to react to that,-Anyway, i admire your merciness. To befriend an old enemy, it takes a good heart.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-We were never enemies,-Harry said,-Sometimes people just don’t get along at first.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> -I’m sure, but he was a death eater. He still has a mark, so some could say he still is a death eater.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Mister Houghton,Why are you buying this house?-Harry cut him off, not wanting to listen to anything else he had to say about Draco,-Why would you want to live here? It will take even more money to reconstruct the Manor, than to buy it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Live? Reconstruct?-he laughed,-Mister Potter, I’m not planning to do either</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’m a historian, you see,-he said and continued walking,-I’m writing a book about the war and this,-he raised his arms,- is one of the most pivotal locations! I wrote to Mrs Malfoy hoping for an opportunity to study it when i found out the house was on sale for such a pathetic price,-he kept smiling and Harry hated that smile more with every second,-At first, i planed to dedicate only a couple chapters to Malfoys, but now that i have all this, i may write a whole book! “The fall of the Malfoy family”! A detailed analysis! What do you think?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-The fall?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, yes,-Harry saw how content he was to finally talk about this,-I mean, look at them now. Father is in Azkaban, mother ran away, and the son is...well, I doubt we need any comment on the future of Draco Malfoy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Houghton laughed, expecting Harry to share his happiness. Harry stared at him, trying to get a hold of his anger, but failed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Get out.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Excuse me?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You heard me,-Harry quickly reached the door and opened it for Houghton,-I promise you to do my absolute best for you to never set foot in this house again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The man looked deeply shocked. Harry slammed the door in his face and turned around to see where and how Draco was. He saw him disappearing in one of the halls and followed him there. The invisibility cloak was waiting for him on that sofa, carefully folded.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Turns out, that hall ended with another door - one leading to the backyard. Draco walked out of it, but left the door open, as if inviting Harry to join him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Just as Potter noticed earlier, the backyard was gorgeous. Bigger than any of those Harry had seen before and you could tell it had been cared for.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Right in front of the house, there was a green lawn. You could see the whole yard from it. Draco sat down right on the grass and Harry followed his example.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It didn’t go that bad,-Malfoy said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Did you hear him?-Draco nodded,-We need to write to your mother, not let her sell the house to someone like him!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don’t think she cares,-Draco kept looking ahead of himself. At the flowers all around them, at a small pond a little farther. The rain ended a little while ago and everything seemed so fresh and welcoming - it didn’t match the boys’ mood at all,-Maybe she’s right.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-About selling the house?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-About not caring,-he started pulling grass out and throwing it around himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Don’t say that,-Harry asked,-He’s an idiot, he doesn’t know you or your family.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It doesn’t matter. All he said was true,-Draco didn’t sound upset, he sounded absolutely indifferent,-But thank you for doing this for me. I learned some new things.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Like what?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Apparently i’m also ruining your reputation. Good thing no one knows about the court,-it was the first time Draco had mentioned it...ever. Harry looked at him, but he was already laying on his back, hiding his eyes from the sun.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Screw reputations,-Harry said, laying down too,-Mine has been ruined so many times that it simply doesn’t exist anymore,-Draco smiled weakly,-Are you going to talk to your mother?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, i’ll tell her about what he said, but she’ll make the decision. I’m too tired to worry about it now,-Harry didn’t know what to say to that. He wanted Draco to smile again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Tell me something nice about this place,-he said,-A good memory,-Draco sat up on his elbows and looked at Harry, who was still laying down on his back. Malfoy had to squint his eyes because of the sun, and his hair was all messed up and natural - if they could take this scene outside of the context, and just pretend that they came here to relax and talk - it would be utopic.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay. See that pond?-Draco pointed and Harry nodded,-That’s where i learned to fly on a broom.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What? How?-Draco smiled from Harry’s reaction.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-My dad had a dream, he wanted me to become the youngest Quidditch player in the history of Hogwarts so he taught me everything since I could walk,-Draco said,-Then you showed up and beat me, but that’s irrelevant.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Sorry,-Harry said with a silly smile and Draco gave him a gentle slap on the head.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I was 7 or 8 when i started actually flying. Father would throw rocks into the sky, as high as he could, and I had to catch them. The thing is, I kept sliding from the broomstick. But my father solved that problem,-Draco sat up, Harry could see how the memory lane took over him,-I was a little afraid of water, and since i was a child my parents told me stories about creatures that lived in the oceans. I was assured a huge monster lived in our pond,-Harry chuckled,-So dad made me fly above it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah, it seems harsh now, but it took me two days to learn to hold on to my broom tightly and I never fell off of it again. Plus, i only fell into the pond once,-Harry looked at him in shock,-Dad caught me, of course,-Draco rolled his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a while they just stayed there. Draco told some more stories and the manor stopped being only a house of nightmare and pain to Harry, he learned to see it from another angle. This house was full of memories, every corner of every destroyed room held something important, something that defined Draco as a person. With every new story, every little detail, Harry regretted that he didn’t get to see the manor when the family that lived in it was safe and happy. It was a beautiful place back then. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Heeeey<br/>So here's the new part, really hope you like it because i've been brainstorming it for months. probably.<br/>Hope you guys are doing well! Thank you for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Chapter 20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The boys went back to school that day. Complete yet unexpected exhaustion didn’t let them even consider an idea of partying with Ron and Hermione or going anywhere else, to be honest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco wasn't used to staying at school during the weekends, but empty halls and quiet rooms turned out to be attractive and calming. Malfoy had a lot on his mind and Harry didn't interrupt his thoughts. They had dinner together, studied a bit, but without Granger (or any motivation whatsoever) it was hardly productive. Soon one of the saddest, yet weirdly light days of that year came to its end and the boys went to bed. One of their dormmates was away, and only Anthony Goldstein's calm and slow breath interrupted the absolute silence the room drowned in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Neither Draco nor Harry could sleep, of course. They both laid with their eyes open, stared into the ceiling, thinking if the other one was awake - and if so, would they want to talk now. And if yes - about what?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco felt a weird, almost unfamiliar urge to apologise - to save the face. Crying in front of someone, just dumping all of his feelings out - that wasn't his style. He wondered how much Potter's opinion on him changed. He wondered when Potter would get tired of all the complications that come with being close to Draco Malfoy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In less than an hour he got up. Potter seemed to be well asleep and Draco tried to be as quiet as he could. Malfoy walked out of the dorm into the common room. It was flooded with moonlight, making it seem silver and shiny and hiding all the flaws the daylight so gladly revealed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He grabbed one of the numerous blankets from one of the numerous couches and sat down on the windowsill. It was broad enough for Draco to be comfortable there, sitting with his arms around his knees, looking into the window and admiring the full moon. Despite all the sadness and tears that day brought, he couldn't help but smile, leaning against the wall and for some reason feeling very safe. And even grateful. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Unlike Draco's judgement, Harry wasn't asleep and he noticed how Draco left the dorm. He didn't call him out (though he felt like it), he just waited for Draco to come back, feeling pretty pathetic simply because of it. Sleep wouldn't come to him no matter how hard he tried and Harry told himself that he got up because he was bored - just lying down. But that wasn't the reason and he knew it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry's heart jumped in a way that was still new to him seeing Draco all cozied up in his pajamas on the windowsill. Malfoy didn't notice him yet, but he looked so peaceful and content, that Harry hoped he wouldn't. His hopes were doomed to crash, but Draco's mood didn't seem to go downhills once he turned and saw Harry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why aren't you sleeping?-he asked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Same question,-Draco shrugged and turned back to the window, but he moved a little to take up less space on that windowsill and Harry considered that an invitation. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He sat down opposite to him, and though it was a very broad windowsill that was meant for sitting - it was only for one person. Their legs touched no matter how hard they tried to move and at some point they just gave up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What do you think Weasley and Hermione are doing now?-Draco asked, though neither of them felt any awkwardness sitting in silence </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I would honestly rather not think about it,-Harry said, making Draco laugh. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Isn't it weird? How it took them a war to get together?-he said</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What do you mean?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, it was obvious they were going to get together. What a waste of time, don't you think?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Was it that obvious? Even you think so?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It was obvious for anyone with a set of eyes,-once again light and quiet laughter flew over a room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, in their defense, it took us a war to start tolerating each other, so…,-Harry said and immediately regretted it. Draco did smile to that, but his smile was bittersweet and he looked away. Harry's thoughts started rumbling* again, he closed his eyes and sighed. ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>What an idiot’</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was well after midnight, they were sitting on a windowsill, alone but accompanied by a moon - a perfect atmosphere for a good old deep private talk, but Harry couldn't force himself to say the smallest things - he was full of regrets for past and future mistakes, he caught himself imagining conversations with Malfoy that never happened and probably would never happen (especially if he doesn't get out of his head) and all of them had a sad ending of Draco ghosting Harry, breaking off all their connections and going back to hating him. But despite all of that, Harry was handling his feelings just fine. Really, just fine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I was meaning to ask you,-Draco said and Harry's heart just stopped. And didn't resume beating until he continued talking,-Back when we had career orientation meetings, what did you decide?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Nothing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Shut up,-Draco gently kicked Harry underneath a blanket they were now sharing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, seriously, we didn't decide on anything concrete. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No one did, those sessions were supposed to give a direction to work in.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, what "direction" did you choose?-Harry asked, making air quotes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I asked you first.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-i asked you second.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, how old are you again?-Harry rolled his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You're gonna laugh,-he mumbled looking down.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I promise I won't,-Harry looked at them with suspicion in his eyes and sighed</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-She offered me...well, not offered, she just presented an opportunity that in a few years I could...come back to Hogwarts and teach…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Defence,-Draco finished his thought and nodded,-Makes sense.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Does it? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, yes. Didn't you teach a bunch of 13 year olds the patronus charm?-Harry's cheeks heated up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don't know, it's just an option, I guess,-he said, hoping it would end this topic,-Your turn now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I didn't promise I'd say anything. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Come on, I told you!-Harry kicked Draco's knee, earning a smile from him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay, but it's your turn to promise not to laugh,-Harry nodded,-As you said, it's just an option that most likely will never come true, but...medicine,-Draco just quickly "put it out there" and waited for Harry's reaction.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Medicine...wow.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Unrealistic, I know.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, no! It makes perfect sense for you, really,-Draco wondered if Harry said it not to offend him,-You'd be very good at it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thanks,-Draco said. Harry looked like he meant it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For this whole time, Draco's faith in himself wasn't very strong. He wasn't as sure he was doomed as in the beginning of the year - and maybe that's why he didn't want anyone to know about his dreams, but saying it out loud helped. Made it feel more real. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Speaking of patronuses!-Harry said once he finished replaying their conversation in his head,-i wanted to know it for so long, what's your patronus?- Harry asked with so much enthusiasm that Draco felt bad for what he was about to say. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don't have one,-he said and looked into the window again. Tiredness finally started settling on him and he regretted he wasn't in his bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What do you mean you don't have one? You don't know how to conjure it?-Draco didn't reply,-It's actually easier than people say, I could teach you,-Harry was ready to go on and on about patronuses and how Draco for sure was strong enough to conjure one, so Malfoy needed to stop him right away.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, I can't conjure a patronus. I don't have one.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-That's not possible, everyone has it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Death eaters don't,-Draco said and those words could as well be magical, because they changed the atmosphere completely.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-But... Snape could! You can too, have you even tried?-Harry sat up</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes, I have. For hours, for days. I just can't do it, okay?-Draco didn't expect himself to get aggressive almost right away,but he did. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don't believe it,-Harry shook his head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-My mark doesn't care,-Draco said and jumped off the windowsill,-Good night, Potter.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He walked away before Harry could say something or stop him from going to bed angry again. But Draco wasn't really angry, he was upset - mostly at himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Looking back,it was pretty naive for Draco to expect that Harry would give up and drop that patronus idea - it wouldn't be in his style at all. But still, when Potter dragged him outside on Sunday morning, refusing to say what he wanted from him, Draco still had hope it didn't have anything to do with their conversation. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I've been thinking about it the whole night and I came to the conclusion that there is no way you're actually unable to cast a patronus,-Harry said, taking out his wand. It was still too early and only a few people were outside. Draco stared at him with all the discontent he had. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You just don't listen to me, do you?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I do! But look,-he started,-The mark doesn't stop you from conjuring it, Snape proves it. And you weren't an actual Death Eater. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What does "an actual Death Eater" even mean?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-People like...like Bellatrix. Like her husband. Like…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Like my father,-Draco said what Harry didn't want to, but definitely meant. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-My point is,-Harry quickly switched the subject,-You can do it. Just try. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I've tried before. Many times,-Draco sighed, but took out his wand. Harry opened his mouth to start explaining - to start teaching - but Draco cut him off,-I know, I know. The happiest memory and stuff. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Just focus on it!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco rolled his eyes. He had way too little hope that it would actually work to take this seriously. He used to spend hours and hours at this spell back in 5th year. If Potter and a bunch of idiots can do it, Draco can too. But he failed, again and again. Back then he lied to other Slytherins that he did it - on the first try! That his patronus was huge and bright, it was a dragon and it was way cooler than Potter's stag. Now Draco realized how dumb and pathetic it all was. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Simply for Harry to leave him alone, Draco raised the wand, pictured his favorite memory - the first time he flew the broom - and said the words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Expecto Patronum!-he yelled. And nothing,-I told you!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It was the first try! Are you kidding me? Keep trying!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco groaned and tried again. And again. And again. Nothing worked and though he really did not expect anything good, he still got upset and angry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What memory are you using?-Harry asked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I'm not telling you. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, it doesn't work. Try another,- Harry said, rolling his eyes. Draco didn't even know what memory to choose. He tried all quidditch-related ones - every win , every catch. He tried using all times when he beat Granger in any school subject, he tried the "Potter stinks" situation and the time Harry had a detention because of him. And that's when he realized he may be thinking in the wrong direction. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Fine, I'm ready.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco still didn't believe anything would work. But this time he admitted the possibility. The memory he chose didn't have a definite color - it wasn’t as bright and golden as ones from the happy parts of his childhood. It wasn't as deeply black as every single day Voldemort spent in close proximity to him. It was...light blue, eventually fading into white. It was full of fear and grieve, but it ended with a burst of hope so bright that Draco had to close his eyes. It was the day he thought his life would end. The day he almost got locked away. The day of the trial.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco was surprised at how detailed he remembered that day. He probably remembered faces of every single one of those assholes who got to decide his destiny. He definitely remembered Potter's. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And that was the face he decided to focus on. Harry's determined, ambitious, bold face. How he smirked and argued with the Minister. How he fought. How he protected him, like no one else ever could, like no one else ever would. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco focused on that, closed his eyes and said the spell with a firm and strong voice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes!-he heard Harry's scream and finally opened his eyes, but there was nothing in front of him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What? Did it work?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Almost,-Harry approached him,-It was almost a non-corporeal patronus. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Almost,-Draco sighed, as disappointed in himself as he could be. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-But it's great! It proves that you can do it! I told you!-Harry smiled and looked as proud as he could be,-We'll try again tomorrow.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Tomorrow?-Draco shook his head and raised his wand again,-Almost is not enough for me, Potter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Maybe don't rush? It's a difficult spell. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I won't faint,-Draco said and smirked to the memories of third year. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Whatever. You need a memory a little stronger than that one.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Stronger? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, yeah. Something like that one, just a little stronger. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco didn't know what could possibly be stronger than a memory of being rescued from the world's most dangerous prison. But it wasn't the rescuing that made the memory so strong, it was the person who did it. It was Harry. Draco sighed. He was really glad no one could know what memories he used, especially that Harry couldn't know it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Malfoy didn't pick one memory. He just started going through the last few months. There was a lot to remember and a lot to forget. Draco went back to that day he actually beat Harry at something and became a Seeker of their Quidditch team. He thought of when he met Lucy for the first time, and when Harry did too. That day in Potter's flat, the muggle food, that horrible muggle drink that actually tasted kind of good. The day they decided to go to the Ball together. The Ball. The Ball…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Expecto Patronum!-Draco didn't close his eyes, neither did Harry. Potter watched as silver steam went out of Draco's wand and covered the sky. It didn't take any shape yet, but it was already gorgeous, it could already protect Draco from anything. And Harry couldn't stop looking at it and maybe that's why - probably that's why - it took him a few seconds to notice that Draco wasn't looking at the patronus. He was lying on the ground - unconscious. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Excuse me for a "Harry teaches Draco to cast a patronus" cliche<br/>Also excuse me for disappearing again, i'd say i won't do it again, but i probably will.<br/>But thank you for reading! Hope you liked it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Chapter 21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Draco woke up to a sound of two people talking. Well, one person talking, the other one was just sighing and trying to get the first one to shut up. And Draco already had an idea of who that first one was. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-If you're so concerned, I can contact his mother,-Draco heard and immediately opened his eyes. As he imagined, he was laying in bed in the hospital wing with Harry and Madam Pomfrey standing upon him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Don't call my mother,-Draco said, in a voice that was so fresh and sober that it surprised both Harry and the nurse. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You woke up, great,-Pomfrey said and wrote something down, visibly happy that Harry's attention was turned away from her,-How are you feeling, Mister Malfoy?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I'm okay,-he sat up. His head started spinning, but Draco did his best not to let anyone notice it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Are you sure? You just passed out,-Harry said and Draco remembered what they were doing just a couple hours before. Patronus. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Did I do it? The patronus?-he asked Harry, full of hopes that he was about to crush. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes, but non-corporeal one,-he said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Mister Malfoy,-Madam Pomfrey asked for Draco's attention again,-I need to ask you a few questions,-Draco nodded,-Does this happen to you often? Passing out?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, never,-Draco said instantly, but his head was somewhere else.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Very well,-she made another note,-How well do you sleep? Do you get nightmares?-Harry, though, was listening very attentively, which was very annoying to Draco and decreased his wish to be honest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I sleep fine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-That's not an answer,-nurse said,-How many hours a day?- Draco shrugged and mumbled something like "I'm not counting",-In your age it is crucial to sleep at least 7 or 8 hours every night. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No one sleeps this much, we have lessons,-Draco said, once again not satisfying Pomfrey. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-If you don't want me to call your mother, answer my questions, Mister Malfoy. How many hours per night do you sleep?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don't know...3 or 4,-Draco said, looking down. Pomfrey just wrote something else down and moved on to another question. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I should have lied, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Draco thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And nightmares? How often do you get them?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Uhm...a few times a week. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-A few?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Every other night. Maybe every night,-Draco was so afraid to meet eyes with Harry that he had to look at his hands only.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Did you work with a psychiatrist this summer?-she asked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Psychiatrist? No,-Draco scoffed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No? You didn't receive any psychological help?-she seemed surprised. So did Harry.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-From whom?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-The ministry was supposed to provide every child with psychological help,-she even put down her pad,-It wasn't mandatory of course, but you should have been offered. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I was a little busy this summer,-Draco said and finally looked up, just to see what time it was,-Can I go? I have a meeting with Professor Slughorn now,-Pomfrey didn’t like the idea, but she had no right of keeping Draco there against his will, especially after he repeated multiple times that he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>fine</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay, but I will need to talk to you more,-Draco nodded and got up. He looked at Harry only once and rushed out of the room</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco!-Harry tried to stop him,-Are you sure you can go?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I'll talk to you later!-Harry would probably run after Malfoy, but Madam Pomfrey stopped him. She looked at Harry with concerned disturbed sight. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-He's okay, right?-Harry asked,-You let him go, so he's okay?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-He's not sick,-she said,-A bit of malaise, a lot of stress. Draco does need help. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-With what?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-3 hours of sleep a night and nightmares almost every time? Mister Potter, a human can't function like this. I assume he doesn't eat that well either,-Harry tried to think of a time he saw Draco actually finishing a plate of anything and struggled,-You two are friends now, aren't you?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You need to look after him then! I know you are going through something similar, something worse, maybe. But Mister Malfoy may not be as strong as he wants to seem. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I...I'll try.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Talking about your problems and helping someone may be therapeutic for you too,-Harry nodded. He felt so ashamed,-Give this to him, okay?-she handed Harry two bottles and he read the tags. Sleeping Potion in one and Dreamless sleep in another,-He knows how to use them. Send him here, if anything like this happens again. And feel free to come in too,-Harry nodded again and left.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>    Harry went straight to their dorm and waited there for at least an hour. He couldn't tell how much time passed, though. Harry stared into a wall as thoughts spinned around his head.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>He may not be as strong as he wants to seem.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>He didn’t receive any help after the war - only more problems.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>4 hours of sleep a night with nightmares almost every time.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>‘How could i be so blind?’</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-The love birds aren’t back yet?-Draco walked into the dorm, as if absolutely nothing was wrong. He smirked at Harry and put the books he was holding onto the shelf.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Are you okay?-Harry chose the most stupid one out of his questions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah,-Draco said, as if asking </span>
  <em>
    <span>why on Earth wouldn’t I be?</span>
  </em>
  <span> He really hoped Potter would get the hint,-Are you?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Not really,-Harry got up,-You just...passed out!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I noticed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And then you just ran off!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And what did you want me to do?-Draco asked,-Can you do me a favor and act like nothing ever happened? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No?!-Harry said, a little too loud. Draco sighed and sat on the bed,-She asked me to give it to you,-Harry handed Draco the potions and Malfoy quickly hid them in his pockets.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thanks.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Now that i think about it, it was pretty naive of me to assume you met with a psychiatrist this summer,-Draco snored.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-As if you did,-Harry grinned, admitting how right Draco was.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-But they never offered you? Really?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter, i was almost locked away. Why would they bother?-his tone went down at the end of that sentence. Draco hid his eyes, but in a second he got up, putting a brave, unbothered face once again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco, but Pomfrey was right…,-Harry started, but Malfoy cut him off.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I’m okay, really. I’m not an enemy to myself, if I had problems, I would seek help,-Draco said, hoping he sounded assurning enough,-So just forget it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry ended up nodding to that, but there was no way he would “forget it”. He made a mental note to keep a close eye on Draco - on the way he eats, sleeps, acts. Harry flattered himself with a thought that he knew the other boy enough to be able to tell when Draco put on an act of a cold mean person, and when he was actually at the edge. He didn’t say any of that to Malfoy though - for the sake of his own safety.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Malfoy, meanwhile, grabbed his wand and headed tot he door.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Where are you going?-Harry asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-To finish what we started,-Draco said with a smirk,-Cast a normal patronus.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry was yet to decide whether he was angry at Draco for being so reckless and stupid, or just tired of it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Are you insane?-Harry asked, desperately trying to keep his tone normal and standing between Malfoy and the door ,-You just passed out!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-This is the third time you told me that,-Draco said, trying to reach for the doorknob.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Do you want to die?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Sometimes. Not until i cast the patronus though,-Harry groaned in anger.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I hate how stubborn you are.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No, you don’t. Can I please go? I can do it here too, you know?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Go ahead!-Harry said, stepping aside.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Really?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah, i won’t have to drag you from outside at least.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No one believes in me like you do,-Draco said, rolling his eyes. But he did stay, deciding that exercising in a small dorm was better than physically fighting Potter to get out into a more comfortable space. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Draco took a deep breath and did his best to focus. He was quite embarrassed about the subject he had to focus on, but if fantasising about Potter is what it takes to cast a patronus, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fine,</span>
  </em>
  <span> he'll do it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Can you just do it tomorrow?-Harry asked,-Sleep on it first?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Distract me one more time and you won't live to see tomorrow,-Draco said, as his mind drifted off back in time. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Malfoy was outside of the castle again in nothing but a suit he spent hours picking a few days before. It was late and cold - so cold that he even had a bit of a flu the other day, but he didn't feel it at the moment. He was walking towards his mother with Harry Potter beside him, talking about Lucy, preparing for a goodbye. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Draco's wand went up. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry had a bittersweet smile on his lips. He looked up at him, with his eyes that can't be described with any other word except for </span>
  <em>
    <span>wonderful</span>
  </em>
  <span> and smiled. He made him promise to come back. He made him feel like he really needed him back. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Draco opened his mouth to say the spell.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>And Malfoy was really feeling a lot that day - it was a good day, so it was destined to be ruined. When Filch dragged him away, not even letting him say goodbye, Draco was so upset he could have started crying. And then Harry fixed it again. It was kind of his thing. Fixing things about Draco's life that were wrong. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Expecto Patronum!</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry kissed him and it lasted for three seconds, max, but it might as well have lasted for the rest of Draco's life, because that memory was now always playing in the back of his head. He came back to it embarrassingly often and found comfort in it again and again. Because though it was so easy to convince himself that Potter was only around out of pity, that he didn't actually care, that he was going to leave him once he gets bored, Harry proved him wrong. He fixed it, again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Holy shit,-next thing Draco knew - he was falling again. He saw bright light in front of him, but his eyes started closing against his will and he lost control of his legs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry was close though. He caught him, not letting him hit the ground. Potter didn't even look at the patronus, his attention was focused only on the boy in his arms.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco? Hey!-Harry slightly slapped his cheeks and Draco opened his eyes with a gasp. His surprised gaze instantly turned into a happy grin as he saw a silver dragon flying in front of him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Dragon…,-he gasped, not able to say anything else. At that point he and Harry were sitting on the floor, still touching, still mesmerized by what was in front of them.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Dragon!-Harry exclaimed,-You did it!-Draco turned around to face Harry - as if to make sure they were both seeing the same thing,-You did it!-Harry repeated and their faces were so close that it reminded Draco of a memory he used to conjure this patronus. He wondered if a new one was about to be created.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Maybe - probably- it would have happened, but Draco jumped off as he heard loud knocking on the door. Banging, actually.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-HARRREY!-they both heard a voice that couldn’t be mistaken for anything except for Ron Weasley. And quiet laughter that was definitely Hermione’s. Harry got up and opened the door. The moment he did it, Ron fell into his arms.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You should have come with us!-he mumbled into Harry’s neck, not planning to let him go anytime soon. Hermione, meanwhile, sat down next to Draco.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I wanted to tell you this for 8 years now,-she started,-Your hair is so great,-Draco nodded, having no idea what to say. He was glad that his patronus had already vanished, but, to be honest, Weasley and Granger were so drunk that they probably wouldn’t have noticed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While Ron was telling Harry about how much he loved him and how important their friendship was to him, and Hermione kept going on about how she normally </span>
  <em>
    <span>would never</span>
  </em>
  <span> go clubbing and drinking, she was </span>
  <em>
    <span>so tired</span>
  </em>
  <span> that she had earned it, both Draco and Harry nodded and agreed with everything they said, looking at each other.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What were you guys doing while we were gone?-Ron asked, minutes later. Harry shrugged and grabbed his friend by the shoulders.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You need to go to sleep, mate,-Ron nodded and fell on Anthony Goldstein’s bed,-Nope, not your dorm,-Harry took Ron by one hand, Hermione by another and dragged them away. His friends didn’t resist, but neither did they stop talking. Harry told them that he would listen to everything they had to say in the morning and mentally pitied them for the hangover they were about to have.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once Ron and Hermione were safe in their own dorms, Harry ran to his own. He didn’t exactly know why, but he was excited to an extent that it took his breath away. Draco casted a patronus. Harry managed to convince him that he could - and he did!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All his excitement vanished once he stepped into the room. Anthony and Ernie  were there too and Draco would never talk with them present. He just gave him a hardly noticeable smile and went to bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But, of course, he couldn’t sleep. For Draco that patronus was so much more than just a spell. Chances are - he wasn’t going to fight dementors anytime soon, but still, it felt like one of the most important moments of his life. Seeing it was so unbelievably freeing that Draco felt like he could do anything now. It showed him that there was good in him - lots of it, since the patronus seemed so big and powerful and that there was hope. Hope for anything, really. Anything he wanted, things he used to think became unreachable, hope for redemption, hope for a happy ending, for love, for all the stuff he used to see as boring - now they seemed like everything a person could possibly dream of. Draco could have it now. It was possible at least. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When the 4th hour of him staring into the ceiling passed, Draco got up and went to the common room. He was tired, very tired, but all the emotions, thoughts and feelings that were boiling up inside of him didn’t let Draco get relief. Well, better than a fear of nightmares.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He laid on the couch closets to the window and stared at the sky. Draco tried to control an urge to cast his patronus again - just to see it - but it could wake up the others or he could pass out again and Draco didn’t want to go through that again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco ended up falling asleep a little before the sun started raising and exactly when Harry suddenly woke up. He too had a hard time falling asleep and the dream he had wasn’t exactly pleasant. So when he saw Draco’s bed empty, he followed his instinct to go find him right now.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Harry didn’t have to go far, but once he saw Draco all cuddled up on the couch, he froze. After staring for only a few seconds, he went back to the dorm and returned with a blanket in his hands.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Doing his absolute best not to wake him, Harry put the blanket on Draco, resisting an urge to tuck him in and failing miserably.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco woke up with panic in his eyes and it scared Harry too.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It’s me!-Harry said right away, trying to keep his voice down,-It’s me!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Potter?-Draco looked at him with a question in his eyes and then down at the blanket that covered his body. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It wasn’t here before, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    
  </em>
  <span>-I’m sorry i woke you up,-Harry started apologizing, blushing desperately,-I thought you might be cold and…,-he sighed, visibly mad at himself. Draco found it so cute that he really wasn’t in control of his future actions.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Which were: grabbing Potter by that ridiculous old shirt he seemed to wear since the day he was born and pulling him closer. Draco’s hands covered his cheeks and the kiss turned out a little too aggressive than he implied, but in a second he corrected himself, making it tender, and sweet and loving.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Malfoy really had no idea where he got the courage to initiate the kiss, but the way Harry started responding to it almost right away definitely helped him to continue it. He pulled away only when it was physically necessary for him to breath in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Wow,-Harry was afraid to be the one to speak up, but just couldn’t help it. He stared at Draco as if he grew a second head while they were kissing, but it wasn’t a bad kind of surprise for sure.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Draco, meanwhile, was going through all possible stages of paranoia and anxiety. In less than a second he managed to convince himself that Harry was actually trying to pull away, not kiss him back and he just made a fool out of himself, and the whole thing can even be considered a sexual harassment if you think about it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Draco?-Harry said, as if he could sense Malfoy drifting away, which he kind of could.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why did you kiss me?-Draco asked and Harry’s eyebrows went up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Me? You kissed me!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I mean, not now,-Draco sighed,-Back then, after the Ball.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh,-Harry, who was sitting on his knees the whole time, now got up and sat on the couch, next to Draco. Partly because it gave him time to think, partly because this position didn't force him to look into Draco’s eyes,-I guess i wanted to?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You guess?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I wanted to,-Harry said more firmly. But Draco was looking at his hands and Harry had a feeling “I wanted to” wasn’t good enough of a confession. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You’re crazy then,-Draco whispered, blushing more and more with every passing second.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why? It takes a crazy person to like you?-Harry asked and Draco - automatically - looked up at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yeah. Exactly,-he said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Then I’m crazy,-Harry smiled. Draco started thinking it was all a dream. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-So you like me?-he asked and it was definitely the most awkward thing he had to say, ever.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Isn’t it obvious?-Harry’s smile widened.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You don’t answer questions with more questions, Potter,-Draco said, and somewhen during that sentence he moved a little closer and now their shoulders touched.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And do you? Like...me?-Harry forced himself to say, now understanding why Ron and Hermione took so long to get together. </span>
  <em>
    <span>These words are impossible! </span>
  </em>
  <span>he thought.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Isn’t it obvious?-Draco asked, eyes locking with Harry.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Their second (or third, to be exact) kiss wasn’t perfect too, but it was theirs, it was honest and it was long awaited, which made it better than perfect. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So I really did disappear for a while this time, huh.<br/>Unfortunately, I do not have any excuse for this so just accept my apology and this trashy chapter.<br/>A lot has happened since the last time I posted; I turned 19 (wow), I got absolutely obsessed with 'Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency' (please watch it) and I kinda got tired of this fic. I do not know when the next part will be posted - in case anyone was actually looking forward to this one.<br/>I had a lot of plans for this fic and this chapter was not supposed to be final - and hopefully it won't be. Either way, thank you so much for reading, would be pretty cool if you left kudos or comments.<br/>Also follow me on IG (https://www.instagram.com/geeky__page/), I have more Drarry fanfiction there and some other fandoms too.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Chapter 22</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harry was spared of the awkward morning-after talk as by the time he woke up, Draco had already been long gone, having his breakfast in the Great Hall together with Ron, who was pressing his hands against his ears in a desperate attempt to save himself from the noise; and Hermione, who looked calm and peaceful, absolutely unbothered by the usual chatter.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-Good morning,-Harry took his seat and gave an eloquent (in his opinion) glance to Draco, to which he only replied with a nod.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I may actually be dying here, but sure, Harry, good morning!-Ron said, raising his voice which sent another wave of headache and made him moan.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You don’t die from a hangover,-Draco said, not looking up from his plate. Harry tried to read his face, but it didn’t express anything unusual.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It sure doesn’t feel like it,-Ron said, dropping his head on the table, millimeters away from a plate full of cereal.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Is Hermione okay?-Harry asked, trying to call for his friend but getting ignored.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-She can’t hear you,-Ron mumbled,-Noise blocking spell,-Harry gasped in awe.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why don’t you cast one too?-Ron opened his mouth to say something, paused and drifted off to sleep. Harry nodded and left his friend alone.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With Ron asleep and Hermione temporarily deaf, Harry got what he wanted and feared. Alone time with Draco. Malfoy purposely avoided looking up and it was the only thing about him that gave away that anything at all was wrong. A couple times Harry cleared his throat and even opened his mouth, but still couldn’t push the words out of himself. There were no words, actually. He had absolutely no idea what people say or do in such situations. In the glimpses of aunt Petunia’s favorite rom-coms Harry had managed to catch throughout the years of living on the Privet street, he had only learned that all the awkwardness is usually cut off, and the next morning is perfect and adorable, with kisses on cheeks, hand-holdings and unreasoned cuddling. None of that seemed to be coming Harry’s way so he had to take control over his own rom-com, if he even wanted one.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-So,-Harry said,-Is everything alright?-more than anything he hoped that this question would be enough to cover everything that had been going on in his mind, because the rest of his thoughts was...to say the least, messy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, I’m not the one who was apparently drowning himself in alcohol last night, so yes,-Draco smirked, but that answer didn’t give Harry anything but crippling anxiety that Malfoy had decided to act as if nothing had happened at all.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Right,-Harry pushed a weak smile, wondering when it would be appropriate to get up and leave and end this conversation that rapidly became nothing but a humiliation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And you?-Draco asked, much quieter now. His hand slid under the table and quickly found Harry’s,-Are you alright?-their eyes met and Harry hoped to all the Gods who existed and who didn’t that he wasn’t blushing right now.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes. I am.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The whatever-it-was they had during the breakfast didn’t really count as a proper conversation about their potential relationship, current feelings about each other or the whole journey they had been through together, but both of the boys were too secretly happy to care and in both of their experiences, a lot of talking rarely leads to anything good.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Till the end of the day the whole crew remained impressively dysfunctional - Ron and Hermione with their hangover that couldn’t be cured by no spells or potions (Granger had no choice but to actually listen to people once the classes started which did not make her happy), and Harry and Draco - for completely different reasons.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Till the end of the day, Harry caught Draco looking at him (almost as much as he caught himself looking at Draco); accident touches now became more awkward but also more significant and were sometimes followed by small smiles or blushing cheeks. Harry didn’t know if whatever they had going on was visible to other people, nor did he care. He had absolutely no problem with holding Draco’s hand right now - on his way from Transfiguration to Potions, or hugging him by his shoulders while going to lunch, or even kissing him before they had to part for different classes. Draco’s possible reaction was really the only thing that stopped him from doing all those things. Malfoy would want to be subtle, he’d want to hide, Harry thought. They had to talk about it, he knew.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-So I was at Madam Pomfrey’s,-Hermione started, as she walked into the 8th grade common room and sat down on the couch next to Ron. Harry and Draco were there too, sharing another couch that suddenly seemed too small for two people,-And she asked me about you?-Hermione added, looking at Draco. She seemed quite puzzled with the nurse's question.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Really?-Draco shrugged,-Well I’m fine.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Did you pass out yesterday?-she asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Pass out? Wow!-Ron chuckled.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I did not pass out,-Draco rushed to clarify,-I just...fell asleep,-absolutely no one in the room believed him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What were you even doing?-Hermione asked, throwing a suspicious glance at Harry.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why are you looking at me?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-He was teaching me to cast a patronus,-Draco said, choosing to end this whole passing-out conversation as quickly as possible.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh! Interesting,-Hermione seemed to have relaxed,-How did it go? Did you get at least a non-corporeal one?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well,-Draco scoffed proudly,-I actually casted a corporeal one,-he tried to make it sound like it wasn’t a big deal, but his excitement and the pride he took in such achievement got in a way.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Shut up!-Ron said, probably too loudly as it attracted at least a dozen of eyes of their classmates.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yup,-Draco leaned in and smiled. Harry was smiling too.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And what was it?-Hermione asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Guess,-Draco offered, lighting up the fire of a good old competition in Hermione’s eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Peacock!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What? No.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-A snake?-Ron asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,-Draco rolled his eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-A ferret!-Hermione exclaimed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay I don’t like this game anymore,-Draco said, hearing Harry laughing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh, wait!-Ron raised his arm, as if he was in class,-A dragon!-now it was Hermione’s turn to roll eyes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Just because his name literally translates to Dragon doesn’t mean it’s his patronus,-she said and Harry laughed even more.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It’s actually true…,-Draco said,-It was a dragon.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh. Really?-heat touched Hermione’s cheeks and she chuckled awkwardly,-That’s great! I mean, casting a patronus in one day - very impressive.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thanks,-Draco said and pushed Harry with his elbow for laughing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The rest of the evening and a few nightly hours were as uneventful as a studying session can be. Every new day only brought the exams closer and every new class gave them more material to go over. Most of the students dedicated 80% of their time to those exams, but it still did not guarantee success. And even hangover Hermione stayed up till 1 am and didn’t let any of her friends sleep either, even after Ron started actually sobbing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By the time Harry got to his bed, he felt so exhausted that no thoughts except for ‘SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP’ visited his head. He mumbled something remotely similar to ‘Good night’ into the pillow and fell asleep right away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The next morning looked a lot like the previous one - Harry woke up almost too late to go for breakfast and the bed opposite to him - as well as all other beds in their dorm - was empty. Harry slowly walked towards the Great Hall, still ‘enjoying’ the remaining bits of yesterday’s headache. Today was supposed to be a relatively simple day for him - minimum classes, then Draco’s and Ron’s Quidditch training session, which Harry could use as an excuse not to study with Hermione and then - actually studying with Hermione. This week already seemed to be lasting forever and it was only Tuesday. Harry made a mental note to </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>go out this weekend, even just to visit Lucy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Though he hadn’t seen her in a while, Lusy occupied 70% of Harry’s thoughts. He woke up thinking about how the adoption procedures were going and fell asleep wondering how he could help. Ron had told him million times that they had done everything they could and now it was just a question of whether the Weasley family gets approved by the ministry or not. Draco never asked about it and Harry had never seen him talking to Ron alone, but he could tell it was bothering Malfoy too.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Mail!-Harry heard some first-year shouting as he entered the Great Hall. And really, dozens of owls flew above his head, dropping beautiful letters and packages to their rightful owners. Harry rushed to his table, already noticing the usual pile of ‘fan-mail’ next to his plate. He pushed it away and sat down.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Not even opening them now, huh?-Draco asked.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-They’re mostly the same…,-Harry mumbled, </span>
  <em>
    <span>very </span>
  </em>
  <span>embarrassed by his actions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You should start a rumor you’re dating someone,-Ron said casually and Draco choked on his pumpkin juice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why would i do that?-Harry asked, trying to keep it cool.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Then all those Mrs. Potter wannabes would lose hope,-Weasley said, catching a letter that an unfamiliar owl dropped on him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don’t think it would actually stop them,-Hermione chimed in, opening up her letter,-Remember when everyone thought we were dating? They only sent more letters. Usually ones threatening to kill me,-Ron rubbed Hermione’s back, hiding a smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-They don’t bother me that much,-Harry said,-And no one actually did anything to hurt you back then!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Oh, lucky me!-Hermione said.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I actually wonder what will happen once you do start dating someone,-Ron said and Harry wished for nothing but for him to shut up,-I mean, this time they may actually eat your lover alive,-Weasley nodded at Harry’s mail.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay, great talk!-Harry clapped his hands and took Ron’s half-opened letter away from him,-Who’s this from anyway?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Hey!-Ron grabbed his letter back with aggression Harry didn’t quite expect,-None of your business!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Okay, okay!-Harry raised his hands in a peaceful gesture,-We have secrets from each other now?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I don’t know, do we?-Ron asked and for a second his sight moved to Draco. Which Harry, of course, noticed and regretted starting this conversation dearly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Good.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-We are late,-Draco said, getting up. In a minute half of the Great Hall followed his lead and moved to the classes. The thoughts about Ron’s letter occupied Harry’s brain right until Draco’s hand accidentally brushed his and stayed that way for a couple of seconds. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The classes ended pretty quickly that day (as they always do, when you sleep through them) and soon Harry found himself sitting at the tribunes of the Quidditch pitch next to Hermione. The training had just started and the team was only getting on the brooms.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Do you know what was in that letter?-Harry asked Hermione.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-What letter?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-The one Ron took away from me.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You mean, the one </span>
  <em>
    <span>you took away from Ron?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Well, yes, that one,-Harry said,-Is it about Lucy?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-No,-Hermione sighed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Then what is it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-It’s..uhm...a confirmation,-she said, carefully.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Of what?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Of a rent.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Of what?-Harry felt as if he had suddenly turned into a toddler and Hermione couldn’t use sentences longer than 3 words with him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-A flat,-she said, looking into a textbook in her lap.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-A flat? For whom?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-For us,-Hermione said,-Ron and I,-it took Harry a moment to understand what she was talking about.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-You are moving in together,-she nodded,-Right. Of course.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Harry could have sworn on any magic equivalent of a Bible that he had no idea why he suddenly got so upset after hearing the news. Ron and Hermione, being in a very serious relationship, having gone through so much together, being very, very much in love, had decided to move in together. It was more than explainable, it was kind of expected. Then why did Harry feel so...betrayed? So suddenly alone? He felt like a child again, but for a completely different reason.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Are you okay?-Hermione asked, after Harry had remained silent for a minute, just staring into his shoes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Yes! Yes, of course,-Harry looked at Hermione and smiled. His eyes felt teary, but that didn’t have to mean he actually was about to cry, right?- I’m very happy for you.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Thank you,-Hermione smiled. Her eyes were getting red too,-It’s near the Diagon Alley. Close to George. We picked it during Christmas.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Right. Great, that’s just...great.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Ron didn’t want to tell you back then because he thought you may get upset,-Hermione said after a second.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Why would I get upset?-Granger’s weak motherly smile was enough to bring Harry back, to the day after Christmas. How the three of them spent it at the Grimmauld Place, drinking firewhiskey and just laughing. Laughing endlessly, laughing desperately -  about funny things, about scary things, about painful things. They laughed more and more because after everything that had happened, laughing was the only thing left to do. And Harry felt so damn happy. He forgot about everything, about Draco, about exams, about nightmares, about his own future that was slowly becoming his worst enemy. Harry was lost, terrified and anxious most of the time, but during that night with his two closest friends at the place that never managed to and probably never would become his home, he was free. And happy. He wanted to be this way forever. So he asked for it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Drunk and still partly lonely Harry Potter gave his friends more drinks and started talking about ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>how fun it would be if we all lived together!’</span>
  </em>
  <span> He said that they could live right here, that this house is too huge for him alone and that this way Ron and Hermione wouldn’t have to pay for rent. He went on imagining breakfasts together and Friday nights that would look exactly like the one they’re having now. And it would be just perfect and they would be so happy and Harry would never trade it for </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything ever. </span>
  </em>
  <span>And neither Ron nor Hermione had guts to cut him off. They, considerably more sober, listened to him and nodded, not agreeing to anything, but not refusing either. In the end Ron ever said that ‘yeah. It would be bloody fun’.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>-I was drunk. I didn’t actually expect you two to move in with me,-Harry said as one of the most embarrassing flashbacks of his life ended.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-I know,-Hermione put her hand on his shoulder,- I was just trying to be...sensitive?-Harry scoffed,-You know, you don’t have to live at Grimmauld if you don’t want to.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-And where am i supposed to live?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>-Wherever you like,-Harry nodded, but he couldn’t imagine a place in wizarding London he liked enough to move into. What he </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked </span>
  </em>
  <span>was the warm and noisy Burrow, that always welcomed Harry even though it hardly had any place for him. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked </span>
  </em>
  <span>his old dorm, the one he shared with Ron, Neville, Dean and Seamus. He liked how it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>his, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but still remained distantly impersonal. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked </span>
  </em>
  <span>his new dorm too, though he still wasn’t used to it and it didn’t hold as many memories as the old one, Harry liked waking up in the middle of the night and hearing Draco’s calm breath from across the room. He liked how silver light shone from the window. He liked the posters they had up on the walls - the ones they chose. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He liked that he never had to be alone in any of those places. They were the only ideas of home he had and Harry just knew that no brand new fancy flat in the Diagon Alley or a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade would make him feel quite the same way.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I promise not to disappear every time I post, but then do it again. So. Sorry for a long hiatus, but here's the new chapter!<br/>This one feels kinda random, but I'm doing my best to express all my favorite headcanons and thoughts about post-war Harry, who is - in my opinion - very lost, very confused and just has no idea what he is doing. <br/>Draco isn't doing much better, as you can see, there's just some more hidden aggression + fear + insecurities and good old internalized homophobia &lt;3<br/>Anyway, hope you enjoyed, I won't promise to post soon, but I'll definitely try to and thank you so much for reading! Also thank you for your kind words under previous chapters! Nothing motivates me to write more than your comments.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I haven't posted anything here in a while, so hi :)<br/>This fic is probably going to be hella long, but it's the 8th year AU, basically classic in Drarry fanfiction, so...<br/>Anyway. Hope you enjoy, kidos and comments are very, very appriciated.<br/>Thank you!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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